Shbbrs: Mischievous Guardians

Step right up, step right up! You, sir, have you heard about the new household guard opportunity? No? Or you, ma'am? Surely you jest! Not one of you have even heard of them? Well, let me introduce you to . . . SHBBRS!

In this document

All artwork by Shanda Nelson unless otherwise stated

What Now?

I know, I know, you look at these cute wispy creatures with cute fangs and cute glowing red eyes and cute menacing frowns, and you wonder, "What IS that?"
Well, folks, let me tell you! Shbbrs are twilight creatures!
No, no, don't run away! They won't harm you! At least, not while they work for me. You see, shbbrs love magick. If you give them little magick wells, why, they'll do whatever you ask of them! Guard treasure, act as bodyguards, zap the neighbor's dog for yapping too loud--as long as you have the magick, they're yours to command!

staircase by Ekaterina Astakhova

I'm not sure . . .

Sbbrs are worth the silvers you spend on magickal wells! They don't eat food, they don't take breaks, they just float around and give that snobby man who elbowed his way into line in front of you at your own party an icy glare.
Icy, you say? Yes! Shbbrs are named for the cold they emit. Can frost up a hallway or sidewalk right fast. And the best part is, their targets don't even see them coming! That's right, their wispy appearance acts as camoflage, so they sneak up on their unsuspecting prey--target--without notice.
Yes, they do have other talents. They make long-lasting ice cubes.

Quick word of warning--don't run out of magick. Keep several small wielded containers that mystery artists use to store backup energy in your pantry or cellar. Store it like food. Shbbrs are not exactly the patient sort, so if you run out, they'll fade away into the morning mist, and you won't see them again.

Well . . . maybe

Think of it! It is dark, the storm rages outside, lightning and thunder, and a hooded thief decides to take advantage. They choose your house, and fiddle with the lock to get in.
Fog rises behind them. They shudder as the air becomes cold. Their breath puffs at the lock, hiding it from view. Something strange is going on, so they turn, and meet the glowing red eyes of their assailant. Ice crystals coat them, from head to toe, and their lockpicks burn their fingers from cold. They drop them and scamper away--or try to. Fog chases them, snapping and snarling--and the fright makes certain they never return. Better than any watchdog, I tell you!
And if they can chase away a thief, think about what they can accomplish with your mother-in-law!
I jest, I jest.

Yes, yes, you might get a reputation for having a haunted house. Just bring the shbbrs out to meet guests during entertainment nights--and let them in on the secret to the safety of your valuables.
And remember to tell them that the cold that infuses your home is a feature of shbbr service, not a vexation. If you employ them during the hottest times of year, you won't regret it.

I have questions . . .

Of course I welcome inquisitiveness! These marvelous creatures are quite the curiosity.
Shbbrs is a twilight term used by conjurers. It means 'cold'.
No, they don't reek, normally. If they become annoyed with someone, they can hide beneath their bed and fa--expel--a hazy gas that coats everything in a rotten, sparkly stink that lingers until it melts. Smart employers, however, will use this to advantage.
Yes, if you employ enough of them, they can create a ski slope in the middle of your mansion entry. But that requires a multitude of them, and remember, magick wells cost a good bit of silver.
Yes, keeping liquids cold is a specialty! But don't let them sip the beer or wine. They . . . um, let's just say alcohol doesn't agree with them.
Yes, they are fine with pets and children! Maybe acclimate your cat, though. Cats and shbbrs enjoy hissing at and swatting each other after shbbrs have iced the kitties' water bowls. It's a game for them, you see.

magician by fxquadro, Adobe Stock Images

So, numbers are limited! Who wants to hire a shbbr first?

Shbbrs first appear in The Glass Volcano: The Wellspring Dragons Book 3.