Chapter 23

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His dreaming, his dreaming again.

Opening his eyes, Sunny looked around to see himself in outer space, with distant stars glittering like diamonds. He was floating freely, weightless, and the vast expanse of the cosmos enveloped him. It's a nice and quiet place to relax after everything he went through. It's appropriate for someone like him who craves peace. 

Yet his own mind was in a whirlwind of chaos, the lingering memories of the night before still fresh in his mind with all the emotions that he felt. The guilt, the fear, the sadness, the confusion, the anger, and the relief—he had experienced it all from seeing those crooks die around him.

What's more, the troubling idea came to fruition when he thought of something else: "What if it happened to my father or anyone I cared about?"

Sunny feared how his own Esper powers worked after they tried to harm him. "Would I be okay with the consequences?" he asked himself, trying to make sense of whether he himself was a danger to not just those who wanted to harm him but also anyone he considered to be close friends. It's a scary thought when he doesn't have a full answer or clue as to what he is capable of doing.

Looking around, the serene expanse of outer space enveloped him like a celestial embrace. The depths of the cosmos stretched out infinitely before him, an endless sea of twinkling stars that danced in the inky black void. Each diamond-like orb casts a soft, ethereal glow, bathing the emptiness in a delicate radiance.

The Milky Way, a majestic ribbon of stardust, arched gracefully across the heavens, a testament to the grandeur and mystery of the universe. A palpable stillness permeated the vastness, and the absence of sound was a stark contrast to the cacophony of Earth's ceaseless chatter.

But he knows this is just a dream created by his own mind, a reflection of his own thoughts and emotions. It is a coping mechanism, a way for his subconscious to process the events that transpired the previous night. And by far, this is one of the calmest dreams he ever had. Sunny sighed in the silence.

"I'm sorry," he whispered under his breath, the same sentiment he expressed the last night when he knelt on the cold floor in the public bathroom before heading home to take a long and serene rest.

Scratching the back of his own neck, he doesn't know what to do from now on. His actions from tonight will definitely not go away anytime soon. The fresh bodies will obviously be investigated for the cause of their deaths, and he doesn't want to imagine the authorities manhunt searching for the person responsible for this.

At least he is planning to leave the Ark soon without causing further trouble that he is not ready to face; he just wants to find a place to lay low and heal physically, mentally, and emotionally altogether.

Then his sudden presence caught his attention; it was an interstellar cloud made of purple nebulous gas standing before him. It was a beautiful sight to behold—a swirling mass of interstellar dust and gas that illuminated the darkness.

While it wasn't enormous, being only around the size of an ordinary vehicle. The sight was nonetheless unexpected, for it wasn't something that he usually sees in his dreams. But the mysterious cloud was silent, but its presence was commanding. It was as if it were waiting for him to say something.

After a few seconds, it began morphing and shifting into the humanoid form of a human woman while standing near his height. Her recognizable eyes and appearance made him notice that it was none other than Celestial herself.

Although he is rather curious as to why she is visiting him again at a time like this when he is completely in a terrible  place and moment when there were so many arising problems in his life, he is nonetheless glad to see her for some reason, despite not really having a strong relationship with her.

"Celestial? Your back?" A sad smile crossed his lips. "I didn't think I would see you again so soon," he said, the dream taking a different turn now that his guardian angel is here as Sunny felt a sense of comfort, a reassurance that everything would be fine.

But there was no response coming from her; only ominous silence filled the cosmic void. A silence that he understood all too well from how she was presenting herself to him and the situation that was going on. Making him almost feel bad for greeting her in the first place.

A brief silence passed by before she finally spoke with what she had in mind for him. "I am here because I heard your cries, Sunny," she said, her voice filled with concern and love. "You are in pain, and I can't bear to see my sweetheart suffering like this.

All the burden and the weight of the world are crushing you, and you don't know where to turn." Her eyes scanned him from head to toe. "I'm here to remind you that you are not alone, Sunny. You are never alone." The words leaving her mouth were like a balm to his soul, a reminder of the love and support he has from the people he cares about.

Putting on a brave act, he scoffed at the idea, "I'll be fine, just a bit of a rough patch." He tried to joke, which ended poorly for him after his own inner turmoil was boiling again. An emotion that was too much to handle at the moment. "It's more than just a rough patch, Celestial," he sighed, finally giving in to his problems.

"I killed them, and I didn't even mean to. But yeah, sure, they deserve what they got for being assholes, but I can't help but feel guilty. I'm a good person, and I should feel like that, even though part of me finds it satisfying to see my own enemies die, but I still did something terrible," a pained expression crossed his face.

She nodded, her gentle expression a mixture of understanding and sympathy. "I know, beloved. I saw the pain you endured, the fear, the sorrow, and the guilt. You are unsure of who and what you are in the forsaken world that forced you to come into existence, and I pity you. The weight you carry is yours alone, but I am here to help you bear it." She moved closer, her compassionate eyes drawing him in.

"You did what you had to do, Sunny. You protected your friends and those you care about, but the pain you feel makes you a good man, very human, and understandable. You have a pure heart with a flawed soul, and that is what makes you human," she said, her hand gently caressing his cheek. "You are my hero, Sunny. And always will be."

Touched by her words, he felt a lump form in his throat, the tears threatening to spill over. "Do you think this is who I wanted to be? Are you just striving to do the right thing?" Sunny muttered, the question more of a statement to himself than to her.

"I'm still unsure of myself, but I do believe that I am a good person, and I will continue to be one, even if it means living with the consequences of my actions," he vowed, his voice wavering but determined. "However, I'm still confused about what to do next. There's too much happening around me, and I need to take a break from all of it to clear my mind and regroup," he confessed, looking up to her, hoping for some guidance.

Celestial averted her eyes away from him, her contemplative expression deepening before she finally spoke, "Are you forcing yourself to be someone that you don't want to be?" Her question was like a knife piercing through his heart, a truth that he had never thought of before:

"Are your acts based on the kindness in your heart or out of obligation to those who are close to you?" She continued, "Try to look inside your heart, Sunny, and find the answer. Soon, the path you need to take will become clear," she advised, her gaze returning back to him and a soft smile playing at the corners of her lips.

Almost throughout his life, he always imagined himself as a good man who does the right thing, even though he doesn't know why he does it other than because he feels like it. It's a strange way to put it, but that's how he sees it.

However, listening to Celestial made him pause and reflect. He is unsure if his actions are truly borne out of his own will or simply a result of his connection to others and their well-being. What's more, he couldn't help but wonder if he was trying to force the ideal of a good person upon himself.

Would a righteous person consider himself a himself a good man if he forced himself to be one? He thought deeply, trying to make any sense of this growing madness inside his own mind. However, his heart says otherwise, and he truly believed in his own goodness, even though there is still a lingering  doubt inside. "Yeah," he admitted, his voice cracking from the uncertainty of his own identity.

"I'm not one hundred percent sure anymore. I only know that I want to be better, to do the right thing, and to be the person that I can be proud of. That, I think, is who I want to strive for." The growing perseverance within him could be seen in his eyes, a determination to find the path that he is meant to take.

With one reverberating clap, she brought her hands together, the sound echoing throughout the cosmos: "Then find your own path, Sunny. You will face trials and tribulations; walk through them with your head held high. Because the universe will always conspire in your favor, as long as you keep your heart true and your intentions pure. I will be here, watching over you. Find the strength within to face the challenges that lie ahead. Remember, you are not alone. And I have faith in you, my beloved," she said, her voice filled with confidence and belief in him.

Feeling like the colors were returning to his world from this conversation between them, Sunny smiled. "And I love you for supporting me in times of need." His sudden answer quickly created a shade of red on her face from embarrassment, which made him chuckle softly by this action.

"Thank you, Celestial," he whispered, feeling a warmth spreading in his chest. "I will find my own path and be the best version of myself that I can be. I promise," he vowed, a newfound sense of hope and determination filling his heart.

Gathering herself together, she smiled in return. "Before you go, my love, there is one more thing I will tell you," Celestial said, her voice regaining its composure.

"Speak to Kara about your impending departure from the Ark." Her answer caught him off-guard, making him frown in confusion at the mere mention of a name he himself had never heard of, let alone recognize anyone by that name. Making him deeply bewildered by the abrupt change in topic and the reasons behind it.

"Who's Kara, and why do I need to tell her about my business?" Sunny isn't sure what to make of this; he still thinks this is just an illusion and a dream. But there is still a chance this celestial is a legit sapient entity that can reason and talk while knowing the real world itself. The thought behind that is somewhat frightening, to say the least, but also makes him more curious about who she really is. Regardless, he just might as well play along with her for the time being.

But if what she said is true, then he might as well oblige her and follow her instructions. "Alright, I'll do that," he said, trying to play along, "but who is Kara and what is her relation to me?" Gaining information is always a good idea, especially when dealing with a mysterious dream entity who knows so much about him.

As curiosity gleams in his eyes, he have so many questions he wants to ask.

Her smile grew tenfold. "You don't have to worry about that, Sunny." Slowly, her form dissipated into the violet nebulous gas. "Fate will make sure that you find each other. You will meet her soon, and she will guide you to your destiny. Trust the universe, my love. Just as I trust," then she vanished into a cloud of gas, leaving him to ponder the meaning behind her words.

"Fate?" He said confusedly, "What does fate have to do with me?"

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