A Light in the Dark
TW: Parental Abuse, Trauma tied to such abuse. Reader discretion is advised.
Alken ran up the stairs, tears streaming down his cherubic cheeks, the fear deep inside him, as he heard the shouting of his mother and father getting much louder, and heard a heavy impact. His father had come home drunk again, and Alken knew that he would be next. He ran to his room, moving under his bed, the fear inside him swelling to a fever pitch as he cried, hearing his mother's voice go silent after a pained and strangled scream. Was tonight the night the monster in his father would actually kill them? Was his mother dead? Alken felt a pang of guilt suddenly, remembering his little sister, only three years old, in the next room. He was nearly thirteen, he was nearly grown, he shouldn't be hiding under this cot, he should be in her room trying to protect her. His father had never hit her before, however she also hadn't learned to walk yet. Two days ago she'd started walking, and Alken's only memories of his father all included drunken fits of rage as far back as he could remember. His mother had always told him "Its because you can walk and talk. When he drinks, anyone who walks and talks makes him angry." Well now, that included his little sister Shana. Alken heard the footsteps coming up the stairs and to his shame he didn't leave the room.
They passed his door and kept going. Alken heard Shana crying, heard her fearful words. "Papa, where momma. Papa where momma." followed by her crying and then the sound of an impact. His father's grumbling voice came to him. "Damn girl, better you never learned to speak, stop your crying!"
Alken heard another thudding impact, and his sister's crying stumbled, stuttered, and faded some. She sounded faint, weak, like she'd hit her head. ""He hit her in the head!" Alken realized in a panic. Though his father was a violent drunk, he'd never struck Alken in the face or head as a toddler or young child. Not until he'd reached his eleventh year and, in his father's words, 'been able to take it.' Alken was horrified, scared, but for once, not of his father. He was scared for his sister. He felt something rising in him, the young man felt some sort of calming presence and power, he felt the presence of others. The darkness and fear in his mind began to give way to light and courage he didn't know he had as he slid out from under his bed. His sister's tears and crying had gotten louder, and Alken heard his father swear, and heard him leave her room, going to his parents bedroom. "This ought to shut her up!" he growled, and as Alken moved into the hallway, his old man came into view, his Tiate Police department issued revolver in hand.
Alken felt the presence of something before he saw it as he called out in diefiance, but in a language he didn't know he could speak and didn't understand. He felt its presence move from embracing him, as the radiance of...whatever it was embraced his father suddenly, flaring to life in a sudden surge that illuminated the entire house. His father yelled out, fumbling the firearm, trying to get his hands up to shield his eyes and face from the sudden tendrils of silvery radiance that lashed at him from the strange lantern shaped creature. It did not speak, but Alken felt the sudden flow of courage and bravery guiding him what to do.
Before he could stop to consider further his actions, or find shadows of doubt creeping back in, before the bravery and protection of the light from this creature, this Ukuhanyii, a name the boy had no idea how he knew, could leave him, Alken dived forward for the revolver that had clattered to the floor. He swiftly scooped it up, and before he could doubt himself, gripping it with both hands, he pointed it at his father and looking away, pulled the trigger, pulling back the hammer with both thumbs, he shot again, and then a third time, tears streaming down his face. The gun dropped from his hands then, as Alken buried his face in his hands, weeping heavily. He couldn't bear to look at what he'd done. Then came the man's rasping voice, kinder then it had ever spoken to him, softer in tone. "Boy, damn it Alken, look at me. Look at me, please."
Alken looked, feeling a swirl of emotions he could not begin to process. There looking more human and vulnerable than he ever had, but with more clarity in his fading eyes than Alken had ever seen, was his father, Thomas. Not the drunkard monster whom came home every night, nor the hero he pretended to be in uniform at work. Just Thomas Zeigler, his Papa. As the light began to fade from the man's amber eyes, Alken saw....tears in them. Saw regret. Saw pain, saw love and saw a great sorrow. "You did the right thing, my boy. You did well. I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I was weak, and I became a monster. Protect your sister, look after your mother...." he coughed violently, blood splattering the floor, "Its your responsibility now. Its your family. Whatever happens, you figure out how to care for them. I'm sorry I couldn't be better. I'm sorry-" another violent cough and blood splatter, wheezing as he finished the thought "for the monster I became. You all deserved better."
The man slid himself into a sitting position, cursing as he did so. Two shots had hit his stomach, another he knew from the blood splatter had hit a lung. He was a dead man, regardless if a surgeon was present in the room with him, but at current it was going to take him the better part of a fifteen or twenty minutes to actually die. "But you didn't finish the job, Alken. Pick that piece up and finish it. Before the monster comes back." The man weakly tapped the center of his chest. "Right here. I won't move. Finish it."
Alken tried to protest, but Thomas roared at him, finding the strength through anger and self loathing, wanting it to be over, needing it to be over. "Finish what you fucking started, you pathetic bastard!!!" he roared, even as tears of shame formed in his eyes, though he had not the energy now to truly cry.
Alken didn't even think, the fear of the sudden anger driving him. He scooped up the revolver, lined it up and fired. His fathers eyes went wide at first, but then a smile came to his lips, and briefly, before they dimmed forever, their was a light of peace in those dark amber eyes, the storm that lived in them normally momentarily gone. As blood bubbled up onto his lips, as he wheezed his last breaths, with the last bit of air he could muster, Thomas wheezed out two words to his son. "Thank....you."
Alken dropped the revolver, fear and sorrow beginning to consume him. As he dropped to his knees, tears splattering, he felt a warm embrace, a presence, and he looked up to see the small lantern like figure, ghostly tendrils of light and warmth surrounding him, two silvery eyes of kindness, love, and friendship looking with his, as the creature embraced the young man with its presence, helping keep back the darkness and despair with its otherworldly radiance.
They passed his door and kept going. Alken heard Shana crying, heard her fearful words. "Papa, where momma. Papa where momma." followed by her crying and then the sound of an impact. His father's grumbling voice came to him. "Damn girl, better you never learned to speak, stop your crying!"
Alken heard another thudding impact, and his sister's crying stumbled, stuttered, and faded some. She sounded faint, weak, like she'd hit her head. ""He hit her in the head!" Alken realized in a panic. Though his father was a violent drunk, he'd never struck Alken in the face or head as a toddler or young child. Not until he'd reached his eleventh year and, in his father's words, 'been able to take it.' Alken was horrified, scared, but for once, not of his father. He was scared for his sister. He felt something rising in him, the young man felt some sort of calming presence and power, he felt the presence of others. The darkness and fear in his mind began to give way to light and courage he didn't know he had as he slid out from under his bed. His sister's tears and crying had gotten louder, and Alken heard his father swear, and heard him leave her room, going to his parents bedroom. "This ought to shut her up!" he growled, and as Alken moved into the hallway, his old man came into view, his Tiate Police department issued revolver in hand.
Alken felt the presence of something before he saw it as he called out in diefiance, but in a language he didn't know he could speak and didn't understand. He felt its presence move from embracing him, as the radiance of...whatever it was embraced his father suddenly, flaring to life in a sudden surge that illuminated the entire house. His father yelled out, fumbling the firearm, trying to get his hands up to shield his eyes and face from the sudden tendrils of silvery radiance that lashed at him from the strange lantern shaped creature. It did not speak, but Alken felt the sudden flow of courage and bravery guiding him what to do.
Before he could stop to consider further his actions, or find shadows of doubt creeping back in, before the bravery and protection of the light from this creature, this Ukuhanyii, a name the boy had no idea how he knew, could leave him, Alken dived forward for the revolver that had clattered to the floor. He swiftly scooped it up, and before he could doubt himself, gripping it with both hands, he pointed it at his father and looking away, pulled the trigger, pulling back the hammer with both thumbs, he shot again, and then a third time, tears streaming down his face. The gun dropped from his hands then, as Alken buried his face in his hands, weeping heavily. He couldn't bear to look at what he'd done. Then came the man's rasping voice, kinder then it had ever spoken to him, softer in tone. "Boy, damn it Alken, look at me. Look at me, please."
Alken looked, feeling a swirl of emotions he could not begin to process. There looking more human and vulnerable than he ever had, but with more clarity in his fading eyes than Alken had ever seen, was his father, Thomas. Not the drunkard monster whom came home every night, nor the hero he pretended to be in uniform at work. Just Thomas Zeigler, his Papa. As the light began to fade from the man's amber eyes, Alken saw....tears in them. Saw regret. Saw pain, saw love and saw a great sorrow. "You did the right thing, my boy. You did well. I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I was weak, and I became a monster. Protect your sister, look after your mother...." he coughed violently, blood splattering the floor, "Its your responsibility now. Its your family. Whatever happens, you figure out how to care for them. I'm sorry I couldn't be better. I'm sorry-" another violent cough and blood splatter, wheezing as he finished the thought "for the monster I became. You all deserved better."
The man slid himself into a sitting position, cursing as he did so. Two shots had hit his stomach, another he knew from the blood splatter had hit a lung. He was a dead man, regardless if a surgeon was present in the room with him, but at current it was going to take him the better part of a fifteen or twenty minutes to actually die. "But you didn't finish the job, Alken. Pick that piece up and finish it. Before the monster comes back." The man weakly tapped the center of his chest. "Right here. I won't move. Finish it."
Alken tried to protest, but Thomas roared at him, finding the strength through anger and self loathing, wanting it to be over, needing it to be over. "Finish what you fucking started, you pathetic bastard!!!" he roared, even as tears of shame formed in his eyes, though he had not the energy now to truly cry.
Alken didn't even think, the fear of the sudden anger driving him. He scooped up the revolver, lined it up and fired. His fathers eyes went wide at first, but then a smile came to his lips, and briefly, before they dimmed forever, their was a light of peace in those dark amber eyes, the storm that lived in them normally momentarily gone. As blood bubbled up onto his lips, as he wheezed his last breaths, with the last bit of air he could muster, Thomas wheezed out two words to his son. "Thank....you."
Alken dropped the revolver, fear and sorrow beginning to consume him. As he dropped to his knees, tears splattering, he felt a warm embrace, a presence, and he looked up to see the small lantern like figure, ghostly tendrils of light and warmth surrounding him, two silvery eyes of kindness, love, and friendship looking with his, as the creature embraced the young man with its presence, helping keep back the darkness and despair with its otherworldly radiance.
The moment of embracing the Touch of Arcanis for one whom would eventually become a well respected Magister of the Diamond in Susma's capital of Tiate, Alken Zeigler. Out of tragedy can come illumination. Out of fear can come great courage and understanding. In his case, the calling forth of a Ukuhanyii and the chain of events it would set in motion helped him find all that and more. It saved his sister, saved his mother, and likely saved him too.
Comments