Marie Applewood
Marie Applewood
Marie Applewood, born to Maria and Marlo Willowwood.
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the fifth of november (edited)
I found out phel wrote in my journal today. I'm not sure what day it is but this page says its the fifth of novemeber. 11.5.1863
the sky is on fire today.
Ronin and I bickered, he always forgets his book on---
m̶e̶d̶i̶c̶i̶n̶e̶ ?
p̶o̶e̶m̶s̶?
u̶n̶d̶e̶r̶s̶t̶a̶n̶d̶i̶n̶g̶ t̶h̶e̶ h̶u̶m̶a̶n̶ m̶i̶n̶d̶?
perhaps the walls would know
right, left, left, straight for 800ft, follow the drawings until a four split. take far right, left, right, right, turn left forty steps, graffiti at the corner---- oh we've forgotten the rest again.
K stands for kites outside the window as i sat.
O stands for the old wooden planks of the tower that we hid our book under
R stands for RENAT
**the rest of the page is scribbled heavily**
11.6.1863
*scribbled out sentence*
Hello Marie. You cant remember your lastname today but maybe that is a good thing. The previous page says you have been gone for a month or at least what I counted as a month. I̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶s̶t̶a̶r̶t̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶f̶i̶r̶s̶t̶ ̶p̶e̶r̶s̶o̶n̶
Hi M̶a̶r̶i̶E̶ ̶
Hi journal, its Marie here. I can't wait to see Ronin again. Maybe he will take me to dinner or I can make food for us. Perhaps i'll ask him about-
w̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶n̶a̶m̶e̶ ̶a̶g̶a̶i̶n̶?̶
oh.
it seems i can't recall what i was going to say anymore.
10.27.1863
y̶o̶u̶ no. I. I felt uncomfortable today.
Rigorous and I got into an argument. Best to remember that one future me. I got angry at them for taking away alcohol of all things. geez we really are pathetic sometimes. Ronin wasn't kidding when he yelled at us that it was an addiction. They mentioned felix before the argument. He had kidnapped us but truthfully between you and I future marie, you went willingly. That's what had gotten me so angry. It shouldn't have but- I felt like I was allowed to be angry almost. That was my fault. Rig didn't deserve that.
It was so childish.
You and I were never allowed a childhood but that doesn't mean we act like children and lash out at our...
friend.
Remember Hel, Phel, and Korman. I like them but I don't trust them. Care for them at a distance future me.
you
Remember?
I wish she remembered.
I wish she remembered all the times at the tree
All the hours playing Life,
watching the sun's light get weak.
I wish she remembered all the promises we made,
and the games we played.
I wish she remembered the sound of his voice.
And the painting by her mother.
I wish I could go back in time,
and tell myself the future.
Stop her from going.
Stop myself from losing a friend.
23.1863
Marie is what they say your name is. This is your journal they said.
apparently you used to have friends. according to rigorous and ronin they are dead now.
Truthfully you aren't sure who either one of those people are. Ronin is a pretty name. You read it somewhere once before but you can't recall where. That's annoying. This place is annoying.
My chest hurts. I close my eyes and I feel my chest being cut open. There's bitter hands inside, rifling through my organs to pull things out and replace them with a cold substitutions. My arm hurts. It feels like its been ripped off and sewn back on. My thigh hurts. I feel like there's something wedged inside underneath the stitches. I want to rip them out.
10-19-1863
Never can I forget that day;
where memories remain fresh, as if
they happened just yesterday.
On the day where the iron fell like delicate petals;
Love brushed my face;
The roses on the chill they had settled
But, perhaps, it was pain instead.
The hurt of love, much like the looming threads of my memory
Reigned--
*the rest is ripped out*
Golden Slumbers
Golden slumbers kiss your eyes,
Smiles await you when you rise.
Sleep,
Pretty baby,
Do not cry,
And I will sing you a lullaby.
Cares you know not,
Therefore sleep,
While over you a watch I'll keep.
Sleep,
Pretty darling,
Do not cry,
And I will sing you a lullaby.
10-18-1863
Marie Applewood;
you are a fool
you offered yourself up for an experiment w̶e̶ ̶s̶a̶i̶d̶ ̶w̶e̶ ̶w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶g̶o̶ ̶b̶a̶c̶k̶
braeburn said no t̶h̶a̶n̶k̶f̶u̶l̶l̶y̶ and blew the very idea of using you into the wind. He's weird. And blunt. And uncaring. He's purple.
I saw a cat today
stop forgetting
I saw a cat today
maybe ronin will get a cat, he seems to like cats
stop forge-------
the bartender is good at his job
w̶h̶o̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶h̶e̶
you like strawberries, cats, and red.
p.s. stop drinking. it makes you sick
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