Verlisi Binding of Lives

The binding and the wedding customs in Verlis are a mix of old tribal customs and religious customs brought by the Boreas. They are rich with meaning and beautiful to see. Though most common in Verlis they are also practiced in Amray even by those who have little connection to Verlis.

Execution

An engagement begins with an exchange of hand woven cords symbolizing the other person as you see them. A cord is given as a proposal, and worn around the neck fastened with gold or copper clasps. A girl may accept the gift of a cord, but wait to give her own in return. In some cases a young man has waited a year or more for the girl to return a cord, though it is extremely rude to hold onto a cord if do not think you may marry the other person. Returning the cord is declining the suitor's offer. Giving them a cord is acceptance, though parental approval may need to be sought, and at this point the binding can easily be broken. Traditionally the man is always the one to initiate, but a girl may make a braid in public and, when it is finished, display it predominantly as a crown on her head. With her not saying who it is for, this can lead to guesswork on the part of the young men, but they can usually tell.

When time comes for the wedding, the family and closest friends of the man and woman gather with them under a moonlit sky, and they exchange the second binding. This involves exchanging a second braid made for this with the original braid, so that they each have one for their-self and one for the other. The family and friends then bring single threads of their own and bind the two braids to together so that they each have a compound braid symbolizing that it is more than them that holds them together.

Components and tools

The cords are woven with a variety of dyed linen threads and small beads. The differing colours and materials are indicative of the other persons origin, occupation and history. Misinterpretations of the threads has broken relationship on occasions, so it is now common practice to explain them when the braid is given.

Participants

The woman traditionally weaved the braid herself, and the man will either weave it himself or ask his mother or sister to do it for him. For the first exchange only the man and woman need to be present. For the second it is essential that they each have at least one representative of their family and one who is just a friend. In the case of those with no blood relatives, another person who takes that role in their life may stand in.

Observance

A marriage will take place on the day of the full moon or on one of the four days around it.

Related Ethnicities

• Amrayen mixed
• Verlasten