Floudi Noren's Son and the Saggy Mountains

A Story of Wit and Trickery, and the Floudi's Great and Horrible Axe of the Blue Napalm

Story of the Saggy Mountains (As Told in Brohd Zellor, by Tellek the Wilderness Guide, Around a Campfire with the Red-Scroll Heroes)
In a time before the mountains stood tall, there was a Hill Giant they called Binjamen. The terrible glutton Binjamen, the Hill Giant of Yumkor, hungered constantly. He knew no end to his hunger. He roamed the vivid land, eating every Dwarf in his path--gold, silver, and all. He laughed an awful laugh with each Dwarf he ate. The people were afraid Binjamen, and they moved their villages, moved their mines, moved their cities far away. Binjamen ran after them, but he was a lazy giant and he soon tired, always sitting on a great rock and taking a breather.
The terrible glutton Binjamen terrorized the population, but one Dwarf would have none of it. The great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, found the giant one day among a flock of sheep, chasing them, eating some, and getting very tired, huffing and puffing.
The great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, the clever hero, had an idea. “Binjamen! I would speak with you!”
The terrible glutton Binjamen looked down on the Dwarf. “Whuh? Speak with me? I eat you up!” But the great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, held his ground and held his axe with pride. He spoke to the giant in a commanding voice.
“My good friend Binjamen, I have a way for you to get all the food you desire, without moving a muscle! What do you say to that?” The terrible gluttonous hill giant stood up tall with a ponderous look on his face. Now he was listening.
“My good friend Binjamen,” if you climb to the top of that hill there and sit down, and settle into place, I will bring you food every single day, to curb your great appetite and to make you the King of Comfort, the King of Gustatory Satisfaction, for evermore. What do you say?”
The terrible glutton Binjamen thought about this, pondered it in his little brain, then acquiesced. “Yes. I will do that. No more running around. Just eat.” He smiled a stupid smile and climbed ot the top of the hill. He sat down, opened his mouth, and waited for food to come.
And come it did! Every day, the great bearded axwielder, Flouden Noren’s son, the clever hero, brought a whole swine up the hill and dumped it in the huge mouth of Binjamen. Every day he would repeat this. Day after day the swine disappeared down Binjamin’s gullet. And Binjamen was satisfied indeed! After a year of this, the great bearded Axwielder, Flouden Noren’s son, clever hero, began bringing oxen to the hilltop. Every day, ox after ox disappeared down Binjamin’s hungry gullet. The Great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, clever hero, repeated this again and again for another year. Binjamen was satisfied indeed.
Now however, the great giant began to grow larger and larger. The great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, clever hero, kept feeding the giant. He fed him orcs, then trolls, then hill giants of his own kind, and after all these years, the terrible glutton Benjamin could not even move--not a muscle--he just sat there with his mouth open, still a stone. And so Floudi Noren’s son stopped feeding him, and his incredible girth was bloated beyond belief. Binjamen’s body, unimaginably obese, sagged and flowed from the top of the hill, covering it with the girth of his great body.
Over the years, Binjamin’s body hardened into a dark stone, and they say his head still lies somewhere up there, a hall for strange beasts and creatures to feast and east their fill as the Hill Giant once did. His mouth remained as well, they say--a hole or a vent of some kind, leading down to the fiery heart of the mountains. They say there are treasures up there; all the gold and silver (and who knows what else) the giant swallowed over his long years.
So these are the Saggy Mountains, named in a fashion after the terrible glutton Binjamen, the Hill Giant that could not stop eating. With their gradual slopes and their rounded tops, they show the body of the terrible glutton; they show greed and folly; and perhaps they always will.

Story of the Saggy Mountains (As Told in Brohd Zellor, by Tellek the Wilderness Guide, Around a Campfire with the Red-Scroll Heroes)[
In a time before the mountains stood tall, there was a Hill Giant they called Binjamen. The terrible glutton Binjamen, the Hill Giant of Yumkor, hungered constantly. He knew no end to his hunger. He roamed the vivid land, eating every Dwarf in his path--gold, silver, and all. He laughed an awful laugh with each Dwarf he ate. The people were afraid Binjamen, and they moved their villages, moved their mines, moved their cities far away. Binjamen ran after them, but he was a lazy giant and he soon tired, always sitting on a great rock and taking a breather.
The terrible glutton Binjamen terrorized the population, but one Dwarf would have none of it. The great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, found the giant one day among a flock of sheep, chasing them, eating some, and getting very tired, huffing and puffing.
The great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, the clever hero, had an idea. “Binjamen! I would speak with you!”
The terrible glutton Binjamen looked down on the Dwarf. “Whuh? Speak with me? I eat you up!” But the great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, held his ground and held his axe with pride. He spoke to the giant in a commanding voice.
“My good friend Binjamen, I have a way for you to get all the food you desire, without moving a muscle! What do you say to that?” The terrible gluttonous hill giant stood up tall with a ponderous look on his face. Now he was listening.
“My good friend Binjamen,” if you climb to the top of that hill there and sit down, and settle into place, I will bring you food every single day, to curb your great appetite and to make you the King of Comfort, the King of Gustatory Satisfaction, for evermore. What do you say?”
The terrible glutton Binjamen thought about this, pondered it in his little brain, then acquiesced. “Yes. I will do that. No more running around. Just eat.” He smiled a stupid smile and climbed ot the top of the hill. He sat down, opened his mouth, and waited for food to come.
And come it did! Every day, the great bearded axwielder, Flouden Noren’s son, the clever hero, brought a whole swine up the hill and dumped it in the huge mouth of Binjamen. Every day he would repeat this. Day after day the swine disappeared down Binjamin’s gullet. And Binjamen was satisfied indeed! After a year of this, the great bearded Axwielder, Flouden Noren’s son, clever hero, began bringing oxen to the hilltop. Every day, ox after ox disappeared down Binjamin’s hungry gullet. The Great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, clever hero, repeated this again and again for another year. Binjamen was satisfied indeed.
Now however, the great giant began to grow larger and larger. The great bearded axwielder, Floudi Noren’s son, clever hero, kept feeding the giant. He fed him orcs, then trolls, then hill giants of his own kind, and after all these years, the terrible glutton Benjamin could not even move--not a muscle--he just sat there with his mouth open, still a stone. And so Floudi Noren’s son stopped feeding him, and his incredible girth was bloated beyond belief. Binjamen’s body, unimaginably obese, sagged and flowed from the top of the hill, covering it with the girth of his great body.
Over the years, Binjamin’s body hardened into a dark stone, and they say his head still lies somewhere up there, a hall for strange beasts and creatures to feast and east their fill as the Hill Giant once did. His mouth remained as well, they say--a hole or a vent of some kind, leading down to the fiery heart of the mountains. They say there are treasures up there; all the gold and silver (and who knows what else) the giant swallowed over his long years.
So these are the Saggy Mountains, named in a fashion after the terrible glutton Binjamen, the Hill Giant that could not stop eating. With their gradual slopes and their rounded tops, they show the body of the terrible glutton; they show greed and folly; and perhaps they always will.