Close Call

Life, Identity

Fendir and Kastella make it to the hunting lodge exhausted and grateful for a place to rest for the evening.

Kastella slammed the doors to the manse closed behind her and she quickly grabbed a rope and started wrapping the handles closed. Suddenly they heard the orcs scream and yell. Fendir propped himself against the door and braced himself for impact. Fendir saw blood trickling down through Kastella's hair and down her neck and he felt fear consume him. This was too close. They had bit off more than they could chew with this one. He saw Kastella brace herself against the other door and suddenly they heard the all too familiar beat of Cryovain's wings. Their eyes met and he saw Kastella's fill with fear. They heard another scream and some scuffling and listened to the sound of the dragon's frost breath. They tried not to make a sound. Fendir saw Kastella's tail quivering between her legs and he scooted a little closer to her so that he could take the brunt of an attack. After a few terrifying moments, the beating of the dragon's wings grew distant. Soon all they heard from outside the door was some heavy breathing which Fendir hoped was the sound of a dying orc. They waited a few more moments before Fendir stumbled to Kastella who collapsed into his arms. He supported her as they limped into one of the rooms that was empty and he closed the door behind them and braced it with a chair. He helped Kastella to the floor. "Ow." Kastella winced in pain as Fendir helped her down. He took her head in his hands and he summoned every ounce of magic he could muster. Slowly the blood stopped flowing from her head and she laid back exhausted onto Fendir's lap. "I'm so sorry. This was too close." He said sadly, "Are you okay?" Kastella nodded and focused on breathing. Fendir also allowed himself to breath and they sat there for a while. Kastella would occasionally drift off to sleep and Fendir would track her breathing to make sure she was okay. After about an hour Fendir decided they had to leave to make it back to the hunting lodge before nightfall. "Stel. Stella." He whispered gently prompting her awake. She opened her eyes sadly. "We need to get out of here. I'll turn into a horse and get us there as fast as I can. We can't stay here." He said sadly, hating to wake her. She nodded slowly and Fendir helped her to her feet. They stumbled into the kitchen and Fendir turned into a horse and laid down on the floor to make it easier for Kastella to crawl onto his back. She grabbed his mane and squeezed her thighs tightly around his body and Fendir stood gently making sure she was steady. He walked over to the door in the kitchen and snorted before busting the rotting wood open with his hooves. He leapt out of the threshold and bolted toward the hunting lodge. He was consumed with fear that the dragon would come down and steal Kastella off his back and his fear gave him the adrenaline to sprint the entire way. Luckily Kastella was a good rider, even in her wounded state, and she managed to hold on to him. She rode low with her head nuzzled into his neck. They ran for what felt like ages until Fendir leapt over a stream and heard Kastella grunt in pain. Fendir felt his legs start to grow weak from exhaustion and suddenly he started turning back into an elf, throwing a startled Kastella into the bushes as Fendir stumbled onto the ground. He tasted dirt as his face hit the earth. "Sorry!" He said as he spit out the dirt and tried to get to his feet. He felt weak and tired. As he tried to stand, his legs gave out and he plopped himself on the ground. "It's okay, I'm fine. Are you okay?" Kastella limped over. Fendir felt bad for not being able to protect her. He dropped his head as he tried to catch his breath. She leaned down and tried to help him to his feet. "We're close Fen. Here, lean against me." She said as he stood and forced his legs to stop shaking. He leaned against Kastella and they hobbled toward the lodge which was, thankfully, very close. They didn't say anything until they got to the lodge and Falcon ushered them in and gave them the room for the night. "I had fresh water drawn for the basin and hot meals are on their way." He said as he closed the door behind them. Fendir stumbled toward the bed and dropped his backpack and weapons on the floor. "Are you going to kick me out again?" Fendir winced as he leaned against the bedpost. Kastella smiled softly as she also removed her things, "Just keep your eyes to yourself." She said. She winced in pain as she went to pull her chainmail off and Fendir stumbled toward her, "Let me help. Please? You're in pain." He said sadly, genuinely hating seeing her blood staining the beautiful elvish chainmail. She sighed, "Fine, but just with the chainmail." Fendir sighed and helped her out of it, "You know I'm not a complete asshole right?" "Ow!" Kastella said as the armor got stuck on her horns. "Sorry! These things have got to be insanely inconvenient." Kastella laughed softly, "Yeah, I guess. I've never not had them though so I'm pretty used to it by now." Fendir finally managed to unhook it and Kastella took a step back. Her undershirt was soaked with blood. He waved his hand over her clothes and the armor and the blood slowly vanished as it was cleaned with magic. Kastella smiled at him gratefully before wincing. Fendir saw there was still blood soaking her shirt and realized she was still bleeding. "Here." He said moving toward her and gently resting his hand on her side where the blood was flowing. After a moment a golden flow ran from his hand and into her side and he saw the blood slowly stop flowing. Fendir sighed in relief. Kastella lifted her shirt a bit to see a gash that was now mostly closed. "Thanks." She said quietly. "Let me bandage it before you bathe." Fendir said gently. "I can get it myself. You should take care of your wounds too." "Okay. Suit yourself." He said, annoyed that she didn't want his help. He liked taking care of her and being able to heal her. Kastella sighed and walked over to the other side of the room to bathe. Fendir sat down on the floor on the other side of the bed so Kastella would know he wasn't watching her. He decided to give her privacy and hoped that maybe if he behaved himself a little he might get a little farther in the future with her. He was confused by how much she had started to consume his thoughts. He had never felt this way with Sasha or any of their other friends. He wondered if they had sex if that would cure his incessant desire to be with her. He considered these thoughts and feeling as he dressed his wounds and listened to the gentle slosh of Kastella's bath water. He felt himself blush as he thought about how close they were and how easily he could glance over at her. He didn't though. He enjoyed the teasing feeling it gave him. Eventually he heard her get out and heard her getting dressed. "You can come out now." She finally said softly. Fendir smiled at her friendly demeanor. He was insanely happy to be here with her. It felt they were kids again going on adventures in the forest of Flottenheim together. He shakily stood and saw Kastella sitting on the edge of the bed, facing away from him. She was in a soft icy blue linen tunic and her braise. Her tail rested on the bed as she angrily tried to brush out her wet curls. Fendir smiled when he saw her. "Feeling any better?" He asked. "Much. Sorry, the water is kind of gross now." At that moment there was a knock on the door and Fendir went to answer it. Corwin, the chef, was there and he handed Fendir two plates of warm, hearty food. Fendir smiled and thanked him and brought the plates over to the bed. "Here." Fendir said, handing Kastella a plate. She took it and scooted under the covers and sat against the headboard. She gently patted the spot next to her inviting Fendir to eat with her. Fendir swore she was blushing as he climbed onto the bed next to her. He didn't get under the covers though. He leaned against the headboard next to Kastella and they ate in silence. As she finished, Kastella finally spoke, "I think I like the bear best." Fendir smiled, "Really? I thought the badger was quite fun." She rolled her eyes, "You're such a dork." "I was also fond of the elk. I think you found it uncomfortable though, which is surprising considering how often your dad used to let us ride around on his antlers in the palace when we were younger." Kastella smiled and then Fendir saw a tear creep into her eye and she turned her face away from him. "What's wrong?" Fendir asked her softly. Kastella sighed and slowly turned back toward Fendir, "Nothing. They...they'll be fine...right?" She asked him. Fendir saw the pain and fear in her eyes and he finally allowed himself to think about how his mother and father probably felt about this. "Well...well we both know Niko will probably spill the beans and tell everyone what happened. Besides, your father was trying to marry you off to McFartsalot and mine...well-" Fendir trailed off, frustrated with the conversation he had heard from his parents before they had left. Fendir felt Kastella's tail rest gently on his arm. He sighed. He loved how she always seemed to use her tail when she wanted to be affectionate toward him. She was too prideful to use her hands and Fendir loved how stubborn she was. "That's not his name you know." She said chuckling at Fendir's jest. "Did...did you really like him? I mean, you set my pants on fire because you were jealous of Sasha!" Fendir asked her. Kastella blushed a little and turned her face away from Fendir. "Yeah, I guess I was jealous of her wasn't I?" She tried to avoid Fendir's gaze. "Personally, I think you could do a lot better. I mean, his beard was just...ridiculous. He could use a good shave. And a new name. Honestly. Worst name in the world. If you married him your name would be Kastella Badcock. And any children you had would also carry that curse." Kastella giggled, "I bet I could convince my husband to take my last name. Damakos isn't bad." Fendir shrugged, "Not as good as Frostears though." He teased. "I wouldn't marry you in a million years." She said rolling her eyes. "Why not? I'd make a wonderful husband!" Fendir said proudly. "Like hell you would! Besides you're an elf Fen. You'll meet your thiramin one day so I'm not even an option." She said rolling her eyes and looking down. Fendir couldn't tell if he heard a bit of sadness in her voice or not and he felt a tinge of fear slowly start to burn around his heart. "Thiramin doesn't always happen you know. There are plenty of elves in Flottenheim who've married interracially and have lived perfectly happy lives-" "Stop. Fen, seriously." She cut him off, suddenly stern, and met his eyes. Fendir was sure he saw a deep sadness in their bright blue gaze. "We're just friends Fen. It's best that way. Please don't get any crazy ideas in your head." Fendir sighed. "Yeah, okay. I should probably wash off and you should probably get to sleep." He said climbing off the bed. Kastella sighed. "Yeah, good idea." Fendir waved his hand at the water and it magically cleaned itself. He took off his clothes as Kastella dimmed the lamps in the room. He glanced over at the bed as he stood naked and saw Kastella's blue eyes glance at him. He rolled his eyes as he stepped into the basin. He dunked his head under the water and tried not to think about the fact that Kastella had once again drawn a very clear line between them but had the audacity to get a peek of him naked. It was frustrating and confusing for Fendir. He came up for air and rested his head against the edge of the basin and saw Kastella curled up in her giant bed. She always started off sleeping gracefully on her side and by morning she'd be sprawled out on her belly with her hair tangled in her horns and saliva dripping from her mouth. She also snored sometimes. It was a soft, quirky snore though and Fendir found it charming and amusing. He smiled as he saw her gently drifting off to sleep. He felt the water grow warm as he blushed watching her. He wondered if what she said was true. That he shouldn't fall in love until he met his thiramin. He liked the idea of thiramin but he thought about the way his mom talked about Dimitri. He knew that if they had had the opportunity they probably would have married each other if their situation had been different. He also thought about what his father had said. About the fact the he would, inevitably, considering they don't get killed by a heard of orcs or the white dragon that was stalking them, outlive Kastella. That she would grow old and he wouldn't. That they were on different timelines. These thoughts made the fire of fear around his heart start to burn fiercely and he found himself shoving the pain of it down as tears started to brim his eyelids. He finally got out of the bath and walked over to the towel sitting on the smoking chair. He started drying off and he found a clean pair of braise in his pack. He put them on and walked over to the bed to steal a blanket to lay on the floor. As he pulled one off, Kastella looked up at him. Her eyes seemed tired and sad and Fendir wondered if she had been crying. "Are you okay Stel?" He whispered to her softly. She looked nervous and she quietly whispered back, "Will you rest here? Not to have sex. Just...I'm just a bit homesick is all." Fendir nodded softly and crawled under the covers and leaned back against the headboard. Kastella turned away from him and her tail rested against Fendir's leg. He smiled softly and tried to ignore the burning desire to make love to Kastella that consumed his body with their closeness. He was happy she let him in this close. He looked down at her as she curled into the bed to get comfortable and he smiled. Despite the distance the last couple years had put between them she was still his best friend. Fendir drifted into his meditations and woke to find Kastella's back pressed against his thigh. He smiled at her closeness and he slid down under the covers and laid next to her. She moved as he moved though and leaned her head back causing Fendir to move quickly out of the way to avoid her horns. He moved too quickly though and fell off the bed. "Ow." He muttered as he heard Kastella gasp from the thud of his body hitting the floor. He got up and saw Kastella looking at him confused. "You almost stabbed me." He said laughing softly. She chuckled and scooted over in the bed to let him back up. "Did you meditate already?" She asked him sleepily. "Yeah. Do you want the bed to yourself?" He asked her as he climbed under the covers. She turned to face him on her other side this time. "No, it's fine, unless you're bored." He smiled and laid down to face her. He fought the temptation to touch her as they laid there together. "No, I like laying in beds. It's a nice space to just think." Fendir told her. Kastella smiled and nuzzled into her pillow, "I'm going back to sleep now." She said closing her eyes. "Sweet dreams." Fendir told her sweetly. She smiled and drifted off to sleep. Fendir watched her drift off and after a while she rolled onto her stomach and inched closer to Fendir. Fendir closed his eyes a few times to try and sleep but found it a hopeless endeavor. After a while Kastella's tail rested between Fendir's legs and her face ended up being inches away from his own. Luckily her breath was a pretty strong deterrent to keep Fendir's lips away from hers. He turned onto his side away from her smelly breath and saliva and his movement caused her to grumpily moan and move closer to him in her sleep. She curled up against his bare back and Fendir felt her lips slightly graze his skin. He jumped a little at this and sat up. He looked down and saw Kastella rub her eyes and look at him confused. Then she looked over at the tent forming above his crotch and she giggled sleepily. "Oh fuck off. It's your fault." He said teasingly. She rolled her eyes. Fendir got out of the bed and walked over to the window to see the sun rising. "We should get going anyway." He said. Kastella was sitting up in bed looking at his crotch giggling. Fendir looked down and rolled his eyes at her. "Never seen an erection before?" He teased. Kastella blushed, "Not this extreme." Fendir smiled and walked over to his pack to find his trousers. "I'll consider that a complement." He said, getting dressed. "It seems bigger than Gifartus." She said getting out of bed. "You and Gifartus slept together?" He asked, a little hurt and extremely curious. "Well, yeah." She said awkwardly. He looked at her expectantly. She rolled her eyes. "We did before he asked me to run away with him." "Clearly he wasn't big enough to make a good argument for it." Fendir teased. Kastella sighed, "It was...fine. A bit weird. Really awkward. We didn't really know each other well enough." She said slipping on her chainmail. "I'm glad my first time was with Sasha. I think it helped that we knew each other well." Fendir said, not really knowing how to talk about this sort of this with her. Kastella nodded, "I can see that now. Gif is pretty handsome though. He was...just a bit...boring." Fendir smiled softly at the thought of Gifartus being bad at sex. "Is he the only person you've been with?" Fendir asked her cautiously. Kastella met Fendir's eyes and nodded nervously. Fendir felt the air grow tense between them and he fought the urge to make a fool of himself. He realized the air between them was changing and it scared him. What if Kastella did want to sleep with him? He felt himself start to blush and he turned back to his packing, trying to think of something witty and inappropriate to ruin the mood. To scare her off. Kastella spoke first though, "I'm sorry I've been...judgmental toward you. About sex I mean. Now I...I kinda see how it's not that big of a deal." She seemed disappointed. Fendir hated to see her so disheartened. "Well, sex can be important. Maybe you're right in that I've been a bit too...careless about sex." Fendir decided to shut down the opportunity in the air, "Like I'm honestly really glad we've never had sex. It would make things...complicated. I'm glad we're friends and that we've decided not to mess that up." He lied, hoping they could carry on with their day. Kastella was quiet and after a few moments she finally spoke as she threw her backpack on, "Yeah. You're right. It's better like this." Fendir looked up at her and nodded as they met at the door, "Well, would you prefer a horse or an elk for the ride?" He asked her teasingly. "I'd rather ride the elf personally." She said seductively before stopping herself as she realized what she said. Fendir felt himself blush and he found himself at a loss for words. "I...sorry." She said, "It...it was just a joke." She shyly opened the door and walked down the hall leaving Fendir in the doorway in shock. He wondered if he turned into a horse right now if the horse would also be embarrassingly erect and decided not to risk it. Luckily, Falcon met Kastella down the hall and greeted them both. Fendir shuffled his pants around so he wouldn't embarrass himself and walked down toward Kastella. They told Falcon goodbye and walked out to see the ox and cart they had to take back to Phandalin. He felt the tension burning the air between them as they rode toward Phandalin. They didn't speak but Kastella did scoot close enough so that their thighs rested against each other. Fendir was annoyed and confused. He wanted to be with Kastella like that but it also terrified him that it might actually happen. As the sun started setting, they made it to a small clearing to make camp for the night. Fendir built their the tent as Kastella made them a simple dinner with their rations. When the tent was done she entered and sat down next to Fendir and they started eating. He was painfully aware of her and wondered how long this torturous tension would last. Maybe they should just get it over with and fuck. That normally cured such ailments. He thought about what his father had told him years ago and he feared he would hurt her. What if they did make love and he felt the way he did about everyone else? What if Kastella lost her specialness to him? What if she fell in love with him and he didn't love her back? What if he ended up breaking her heart? He hated the consequences of his desire for her. Why couldn't she have just been an elf so they didn't have to go through this? A few times throughout the meal one of them would start to say something but decide against it. Eventually, Kastella put her mess kit away and took off her chainmail to sleep for the night. She looked at Fendir nervously to see if he would do anything but he tried to avoid looking at her body for fear he'd give in to his temptations. "I'm going to go outside for a bit, it's a nice night." He finally said standing and leaving the tent. He walked a few yards away and plunked his head against a tree a few times. He was such a dumbass. He was ruining everything. Kastella probably wanted to run back to Flottenheim just to get away from him at this point. He sighed heavily and saw a fox a few feet away look at him funnily. Fendir closed his eyes for a moment and spoke to the fox, "Hello little friend." The fox's ears twitched in surprise. "Why hello, your kind don't often speak to me or my kind. Forgive me for being startled." It gave him a small bow and trotted over, "You seem to be in despair of some kind." The fox pointed out, sitting next to Fendir. Fendir sat down next to the fox. "I'm just having...relationship problems." He motioned to the tent. "Ah, my wife frequently kicks me out of our den as well." The fox said. Fendir smiled at him, "You have a wife?" "Yes, we live not too far from here. She's quite lovely. Her fur is as red as a rose." The fox said romantically. "Mine too." Fendir said chuckling. "She's not my wife though. We've been friends our whole lives and I...I do feel things toward her. I'm just worried about ruining our friendship or hurting her." Fendir said plopping his chin on his knees. The fox nodded, "I see. Have you told her this?" He asked Fendir. Fendir sighed, "No. I don't want to get hurt either. Part of me thinks it's better if we just wait before we do anything stupid. Another part of me really wants to have sex with her. It's very frustrating. I'm worried if we talk about it we'll come to the conclusion that it's a bad idea. Then...then..." Fendir trailed off sadly. The fox stood and walked over to Fendir and rubbed against his legs comfortingly. "Well have you tried just licking her and seeing how she responds?" Fendir chuckled, "Where I come from, that's considered rude." The fox nodded understandingly. "I see. Sometimes it's good to just wait for some things. You often find that if you do they come to you sooner than you think." The fox said thoughtfully. "You're pretty smart for a fox." Fendir said to him. "Well thank you. You aren't a human are you?" The fox asked him. "You don't get a lot of elves in these parts?" Fendir asked the fox who shook his head. "I've only seen humans, some dwarfs and those ugly orcs. They've been infiltrating our woods more than normal recently. Disgusting beasts." Fendir nodded in agreement. "Yes, we had a rough run in with them yesterday. Barely made it out alive." The fox nodded, "They're quite dangerous. I hope you and your...companion are able to resolve your troubles. You seem like a decent fellow and I hate to see a friend in pain. I must be getting back to my hunt. Have a splendid evening." The fox bowed to him again. "You as well." Fendir said nodding to the fox who turned and leapt into the forest. Fendir sighed and walked back to the tent. He saw Kastella sitting up in the dark. "The walls are pretty thin." She said meeting his eyes. Fendir sighed guiltily knowing she had heard his conversation with the fox. "It's a bad idea." She said looking away from Fendir. Fendir felt a tear trickle into his eye. "Yeah. You're...you're right." His voice cracked a bit as he felt his throat dry up. He sat down on his side of the tent and faced away from her. After a few painful moments, he heard Kastella ask quietly, "Is it?" He turned and saw her looking at him desperately. "I don't want to hurt you Stel." He said sadly. She shrugged, "What if it's too late for that? Avoiding this has only brought me pain." Her voice was full of defeat and Fendir looked down sadly. He didn't know what to do. What if they had sex and it was awful and ruined everything. "Not yet Stel." He decided to take the fox's advice and see if time could make things clearer. "What do mean not yet?" She asked him. He scooted closer to her where they were sitting next to each other. He remembered how his father had told him about how he and Natalya had waited years to be together. He decided he and Kastella could wait a little while longer. Maybe not years, but enough time to where it wasn't painful. A time where they could consummate the feelings they had for each other in a beautiful perfect way. Fendir leaned softly against Kastella. "Let's take the fox's advice and wait." He looked her in the eyes and fought the urge to kiss her. "I...I want this to be right and...and I'm not sure if it is yet." Kastella took a deep breath, "Really? I finally give you an opportunity and you just...want to wait? Because of a fox? Ever since we left home you've been trying to sleep with me!" Fendir smiled at her and shrugged, "I was joking! I didn't think you liked me like that! If this is going to happen I want it to be different. You're different." He said looking into her bright blue eye lovingly, "The feelings I have for you are different. I want to wait...to have sex and do that sort of thing. Not necessarily a long time. Maybe even just a few days. I would, however, like to be more affectionate toward each other. Maybe...I don't know...hold hands and...cuddle. That sort of thing." He said looking down, a little embarrassed having never asked someone for that sort of thing. Kastella seemed bewildered by this. "You're ridiculous." She teased and leaned softly against him. Fendir cautiously put his arm around her and smiled as her head rested on his shoulder. "Okay. Fine. But if we fall in love or something it's your fault." Kastella said. Fendir chuckled softly, "I'm worried we might be past that Stel." "I didn't think young elves could fall in love." She said finding his hand and interlacing her fingers into his own. "Well, maybe the rules are different for elves who were raised alongside tieflings." He teased. She giggled and leaned into his chest, careful not to poke him with her horns. They cuddled for a while before Kastella laid down next to Fendir and fell asleep against him. The next morning was nice as they helped each other pack. They headed back into Phandalin on the cart, this time intentionally leaning against each other.