S161 Recap: A Conflict Of Interests | Ep104: I Can Fix Him

General Summary

What if I told you it's been 13 days since the session? Lmao yeah no, nobody's shocked by that lol xD > okay but for realsies. AHHHHHHHHHHH WHY IS THIS FIGHTING ME SO HARD I JUST WANNA WRITE THE THING BUT IT WON'T LET ME WRITE THE THING SO NOW I'M JUST SCREAMING INTO THE VOID ABOUT HOW IT WON'T LET ME WRITE THE THING BUT LITERALLY SERENAS SHOOTS THE MOTHERFUCKER YAY YIPPEE WAHOO AND THEN CORAYAS FUCKING BOLTS SOME LIGHTNING WITH THE SCRIB OF WONDERS WHICH IN TURN LETS SCRIB #SurgeForTheSurgeGods WHICH, YOU GUESSED IT! SUMMONS A FUCKING FERAL UNICORN > #HowDidYouGuessThat? > SO ANYWAYS IT STARTED CHARGING, PICKED UP ROMAD ON THE WAY, AND JUST, TELEPORTS INTO THE DRAGON(disguised as a bird)'S AIRSPACE SO IT CAN TAKE A BITE AT IT > ALSO ROMAD THINK FAST! CORAYAS IS FALLING!! (#NiceCatch!!!) > OKAY CORAYAS YOUR TURN TO THINK FAST! THAT DRAGON BITCH BIRD IS TRYNA DIP!! (#NiceCatch...TWO!!!) > The Dragon: “You ever have those days where you're like Adult Life Is Already So Gods Damned Weird– That This Might As Well Happen??” > OKAY BIG DRAGON TIME AGAIN I GUESS BUT WE'RE STILL OUT HERE FLAPPING. ISATI!!! ELDRITCH BLAST HIS ASS!!!!!! > #CritCount1 > NOVA!!! EARTH BIND HIS ASS!!!!! > #CritCount2 > Nova: “Ngl, I really didn't think that was gonna work.” > #AlreadySoGodsDamnedWeird > Romad seeing the opportunity to be a funny bitch decides to jump up on the dragon's head by parkouring up it's arm despite definitely possessing the ability to fly and he was so real for this ◡‿◡ (also hi we're back to normal lower case usage it seems) > Serenas: “Love that for him! Now imagine if I dealt friendly fire the exact number of hit points the dragon had left!” > #HeDoesThat #HeDoesAlsoDoFriendlyFireLmaoXD > Seeing the imminent #MortalKombatFinisher Romad is about to inflict upon the unconscious dragon, the rest of the party rushes to convice him otherwise. It Doesn't Go All That Great ☻ > Serenas gets a few words, but honestly his heart isn't in it so eventually he decides to just stop the feral unicorn from finishing the job while Romad isn't paying attention > #ResidentHorseBoyRanger > Nova (panicking) casts command. Romad just kinda shrugs it off, leaving Nova feeling very conflicted about the actions taken this shitty lil evening. > #FeelingEmotions™ #ThinkingThoughts #CharmingYourLovedOnes > Kirin just tries to fucking pounce on a motherfucker, but Romad (A Stronky Barbarian Melee Fighter) just fucking #Nat20 tosses her over head like a crowd surfer at a rock concert > #CritCount3, #GoodCrits2, #BadCrits1, #FinalCritCount > OKAY BACK TO CAPS LOCK BECAUSE ROMAD TRIED AND FAILED TO WISDOM SAVE HIS WAY OUT OF THIS SO NOW IT'S TIME TO CALL IN THE FUCKING BIG GUNS! (like literally we had to stop and call the player back in lmao) > Isati: “Romad, I Can Fix Him” > Romad: “Oh! Well why didn't you lead with that!” *proceeds to heal the dragon and hop off his head* > #Isati #It'sThatEasy > Serenas to the dragon (unintentionally setting up some of the (but not the) wildest shit to happen this campaign): “You better be grateful to Isati because if not for her you would be dead.” > The Dragon (Realizing He Just Incurred A Life Debt That He's Too Fae To Ignore): “Ah. I See.” > #MiscalculationsWereMade #ShouldHaveUsedThatLastLegendaryResistanceIdiot > Also Romad makes the executive decision that he still needs to kill something and so he (pursued by Corayas on hoverboard) goes out into the woods to hunt > #Honestly #VeryMatureSolutionAllThingsConsidered > Back with Isati and the dragon, we are slowly wiggling out the details and also ourselves coming to the realization that this dragon owes Isati a life debt > #ProbablyTheBestPersonInThisPartyToOweOneToAtLeastLmao > Listen. A LOT of shit happens after this point, Isati rolled some checks, we learned Leimnah (his mom) sold this dragon's name to the fae when he was a kid so Isati hits him with the ol' “guess I'll just have to call you my friend then”, Diva gossips with Serenas, etc etc but also let's just skip to the important bit lmao > On The Day She Died She Changed A Man. The Day After She Did It Again. Two Hundred & Fifteen Days After That She Changed A Third Man When Her Girlfriend Slapped Said Dragon On The Ass. > THAT'S ALL FOLKS!!!! I'LL SEE YOU ON THE HIGH SEAS!!!!

S161 Crit Count: Isati Nat20 eldritch blast, Dragon Nat1 Strength save against earthbind, Romad Nat20 Kirin Redirect