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Journals of Drek Orenaid

Written by TheirGraceGrace

The washing waves against the foreign shore woke us from our slumber this morning. The cawing of strange birds filled our ears and the talking of foreigners on the docks outside intrigued us. I stirred, unable to ascertain our location.   Where were we? What were we going to do? Would we find the Jug? Questions rattled in my weary head.   While I did not know it at the time, adventure, as always, was calling...
  Thousands have read the immortal words of Drek Orenaid and the extra descriptions added by his cousin Castor, but very few have experienced the wonders of the strange land of Kerath. None, actually, before Drek's arrival there some sixty years ago. Now scribes are kept busy in the libraries of Sedesta as many clamour to know the curiosities of this new continent.   While Drek Orenaid is no storyteller, his words have sparked hundreds of expeditions to the new continent, opening up a whole new frontier in the exploration of Orkanis. It is a story of cultural exchange in a strange new land, a tale of curiosity tempered with loss. It is a legend about what it means to let go...

Historical Details

Background

This journal was written as part of the story of the figures Drek Orenaid and Castor Orenaid during their adventures in the Kerathian metropolis of Sha-din-ko. The original reason for their adventuring was the search for a relic of the Free Ones, an item known as the Jug of Getranus.

History

This journal contains the first recorded journey to Kerath and the first known contact between the peoples of Sedesta and their Kerathian brethren. This has caused remarkable changes in Sedestan and Kerathian society that are still being felt three generations later.  
I don't expect to be praised or rewarded for what I've done. Getranus knows I've lost a lot along the way. If anything, I've learned this: you never leave empty-handed from an adventure, even when it leaves you with nothing but the clothes on your back.   You carry your pilgrimage with you wherever you go.
World
Orkanis
Type
Journal, Personal
Medium
Paper
Authoring Date
4E 312
Location
Art Credit: emperorcharlesii (me!)

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Articles under Journals of Drek Orenaid


Comments

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May 30, 2019 04:39 by Stormbril

This is a really cool article! I'm a big fan of treasure hunting, and "city of gold" style locations. Gives me a bit of "Road to Eldorado" vibes, which is a good thing! Onto some things I noticed...   For the authors of the document, I see that it's both Castor and Drek, however reading the actual document, I dont see any signed names after either of the entries. I think it'd help to know who wrote which entry -- or did they both collaborate with both entries? It's a little unclear.   Another quick thing about the document, I think it'd help to have the date's of each entry in the article be headers! Something to make them stand out just a little bit more.   I love the introduction of "cold favours" at the beginning of the document, and the explanation of them later on. I was originally going to ask you to create a tooltip for them, but then I kept reading and figured it out.   Speaking of tooltips, I think a few linked articles with tool tips would go a long way! A lot of the words you have in bold might serve you better as a linked article, I think. I'd like to see more tidbits of information about the characters. I'd probably keep the tooltip info about the Jug of Getranus more mysterious though, I like the reveal of it's powers at the end of the document.   One little thing, this paragraph here:  

"We'll need Fiero for this." she mentioned with her usual hurried voice. "He's got that translating spell. Comprehend languages or whatever he called it. I don't remember." I then had Fiero brought to us, and the kind-hearted De'arian agreed to follow us into the city to be our interpreter. Flashing his hands in a gesture we had seen many times while chatting to the Vatarians while crossing The Thousand Stars, we set off.
  I think it could use a little bit of reworking. The jump from "We'll need Fiero for this"... to "I then had Fiero brought to us, and..." is a bit jarring. Maybe Castor wrote some thoughts down about it, or said something, before having Fiero brought to them?   There's really not too much to nitpick about your article though! I really enjoyed my read through of it. You painted a super interesting setting with this article! I'd enjoy reading more for sure.

May 31, 2019 05:14 by TheirGraceGrace

Thanks Stormbril! It's a little late for edits for the DoD challenge but I'll put them in afterwards. About half of these suggestions are things that I had to do to make the word count, unfortunately...   So Castor wrote a couple of her thoughts earlier in the journal, usually descriptions of her visions but her contributions weren't large scale. It was her cousin's journal after all.   Yeah, and I'll fix the rest of that. I'm still new to the whole writing game, so this is exciting enough!

May 31, 2019 16:45 by Stormbril

Apologies for not getting to leaving a comment earlier! It truly is a great article regardless though haha. And yeah, word counts are pretty hard to deal with.   You did remarkably well for being new to the while writing game!