Iss' Diary 2

Harvesting the beasts that tried to kill us felt good, father always taught me to respect the kill and respect the hunt, but I know it won’t be respect I’ll feel when I devour these beasts. It will be victory, and perhaps the smugness of a huntress that survived what she thought to be impossible. I never imagined that I’d find myself at the bottom of the deep seas, the lakes in our mountains are deep at times but nothing like this, and the fish are sweet, and everything feels safe. The salt of it all still burned, and I am still wondering if this place will end up as my grave. So, should I make it to the surface, I shall devour what would gladly feast upon me. Our short rest offered us some comfort, and I felt my resilience return to me though I still feel the effects of my exhaustion. Others seemed fine as well with the exception of Valspira. I almost felt pity for her. I find victory in my survival, but I find no fear in my death, as I told Alma my life has been forfeited to my mistress long before I was born but I doubt the sorceress has a similar heart. Perhaps I judged her too harshly but what it is that I find so intolerable about her? I am at the edge of death at all times, and The Seer has told us so that I would live a life that deserved a saga, and my death would inspire many song and verse. These are heavy burdens, to carry my death whilst still alive, perhaps that’s what makes me so cold at times. So angry. I know I should apologise to the girl, but before I commit to those words, I must understand why I distrusted her so and what I truly feel. I cannot lie, so my apology has to be genuine.
During our rest we escorted Valspira back to the ship, part of me still feels pity but I am also relieved by her absence. This is why I am not ready to apologise yet. Back to the small but rich chamber, I found myself a hat yet before I could do anything about it, we lost Eldur. It scared me; I must admit. To see a stranger where a friend used to be. The thing spoke of missions and duties, and how we must hurry. I stood silent by Alma and prayed for strength to my mistress. This was wrong, this just felt so wrong. The thing identified itself as Elenzen Mizzrarran, he has yellow eyes that strike fear in my heart, his voice cold when he threatened the life of Eldur. I wished to kill it but it had Eldur in him, what perfect hostage to ensure his own survival, a parasite at its worst.
Our dear Alma, cleric of our mistress, she beat this thing in its own game. Or so I would like to believe as Eldur returned to us albeit still in the form of the thing. The sword that seemed to bring madness into Eldur had overtaken him, I had noted my observations of his behaviour before and from what I learned from Alma and the thing itself he has ties to that sword Eldur carries. Perhaps would be the best if we took it. Doubt he’ll let us and I do not wish him harm. Alma will know best on this.
Once the thing gave us our companion back I let my fear go but at the back of my mind it still lingered. So I gave the hat to Alma to identify and she found it to be valuable. It was mine to give so I gifted it to her but she seemed to reject my gift with several efforts. I won’t lie that it hurt my feelings, a hat like that would be so valuable to my people yet I thought to gift it to her. Perhaps I was too foolish in my affections for her, perhaps I overestimated the kinship I felt between us, but I still trust the cleric. If she does not wish to keep the hat than I shall send it to my people, I have no intentions of sharing such treasures when they’d be safer at the hands of the Seeker.
One good thing to came out of this was that I am taller than Eldur now, and it feels good to be taller one once more. To think such things was juvenile of course but I allowed myself a little window of joy, or else this place will suck the last laughter I have left within me.
Have I noted that I hate this place so much? If not, then let the records show that I, Iss of the Mountains, Iss the Stormshield, hated every waking moment of my existence in this place. Our rest concluded and once more I found myself opening doors that should have most likely be left unopened. Behind one of the doors was an eel that I believe spoke? But that seems improbable so I must have been hallucinating from too much salt water consumption. It electrocuted us all, and yet I know I fared better than some. Once the thing was dead it attracted sharks, I did not fear them, they are creatures to be revered. So strong, and so full of teeth. Creatures deserving of their own songs, and one bit me. I must say despite that almost killing me, I felt delight in my predicament. I think Alma thinks of me as crazy now that I said it all out loud. But to be tested by all that power and leave its jaws alive and strong was an experience. I did promise Alma that would not make merry with the sharks anytime soon again.
Inside one of the other doors I found some navigators tool but only the magnifying glass survived, I took it so that I may look cooler when I investigate. That, and perhaps I will needed it for real at one point in our journey.
Joy did not last long of course; we were attacked by swarms and I felt useless. The dread of almost being killed by these things almost dragged me into rage but I resisted. I put my faith in my goddess and my fate foretold something more glorious than a party of fish. I did aided fate though by consuming the potion gifted to me by Mirik, she had warned me that it would taste disgusting and I am happy to have found her to be truthful. It is not as bad as some of the Seer’s potions though. I shudder to think of those things. In another room Mirik found some tablets that had carvings on them, I saw Alma find some also. Of course, there were still more doors to be opened and eventually yet another fight broke. The thing looked similar to those we fought on the surface, its head covered in coral however, and once the thing die by our hand, I lost my cool. I attacked the carcass of the thing and I barely contained the full power of my rage. I stole its own trident to hurt it. I was tired of being at the edge of death at all times, I cannot bear the thought of being killed by such insignificant things and I doubt the others understand as they fight from safe distances and have their neat magicks to rely on. All I have is my axe and what power I can put behind it. I did snap at Alma due to this, but in that moment she did infuriate me so. I will not apologise for this one, I am deserving of this rage. I am firm on this. However, it might have been a bit mean spirited to move the severed head of the beast and make Alma uneasy. Still, I felt so angered by all that has happened in this ship. I am weaker in this place, and my axe wasn’t as true, and neither was my speed.
Do they even know what it means to have your own death shroud over you at every waking moment? I sat down, almost defeated and weakened further by my wounds but Eldur’s offer of sweet wine brought some life back into me. I cannot explain beyond that it was magick. I am grateful that he shared, I know him to be selfish at times and probably he did not want to lose the barbarian that acted as human shield but still I found the gesture to be sweet. I’ll find a way to help him and free him from this thing that has a hold of him.
I could feel that our journey was coming to an end, we had dived further down and found the source of this trickery. It looked like a brain and it shined bright enough that for the first time I did not feel blinded. Eldur attacked it first, then Mirik and I did my best to rush up there for my own pound of flesh. The brain unleased some vine like plants from the ground to stop us but I fought against it, my strength yet again became my greatest asset. I do not think this creature could stop me despite best efforts, perhaps it was arrogant of me to think so, but I finally feel ready to unleash my rage. It’s tentacles tried to stop me, and only succeeded momentarily. I shall not fall to this thing. I refuse.
In the end it was I that strike the killing blow with the trident stolen from a previous victim. How good it felt to unleash my rage, how fulfilling it was to feel the rush of blood, the frenzy of it all. The Seer was right as always, I was created for such violence and I vow to be the perfect weapon by the end of our journey. I believe we will return to the surface soon. It will be good to see the captain, I hope that she’ll be proud of what we have achieved.