Beneath the Rotten Church

Dear Diary,
 
I went to church today. Feels like half a century since I went last - not that I made it to the sermon (regrettably since there is none whose soul needs more redemption than mine). The church doorman would not let myself pass without a smile. But what am I to prove with such a thing? That I am a good girl in need of salvation? Perhaps if Doctor Sutton had asked, I might have obliged but that whole thing feels so long ago, and I will certainly not smile for a stranger when he has done nothing to earn my pleasantries. On the contrary, shouldn't he be smiling at the sight of me?
 
Mr. Anton passes inside without me but I am stuck outside with this damnable doorman. After a while he seems to relent, and a Sister Judith collects me. She leads me to the left and down some stairs. Hardly surprising for a church such as this to be underground, but we walk for a while and I have yet to see any sight of Mr. Anton.
 
The walls become wet, the concrete stripped away to reveal brick beneath. She leads me into a small room. Mr. Anton is not still not to be seen. Sister Judith says she will attend to me shortly, and leaves me in this miserable place. I wait a while, but my impatience overcomes me. There is a nagging in the back of my head, and the walls feel