A.S.S.: Little Waywyrd One

General Summary

Wherein the Arbos manage their rowdiness, discover the meaning of "bar keep," and become acquainted with the Shepherd of Laughter

A Different Kind of Job

A standard day at A.S.S. HQ (also called Asshead Quarters), was interrupted by the arrival of a letter addressed to the brave members of the Arboreal Security Service. Sir Courtois des Lapins, perhaps itching for some adventure, took possession of the letter from the courier, offering an inadvertently generous tip in the process.
The letter was from their Scumrunner comrade Coppermuck (see A.S.S.: Voyage of the Trash Boat), who implored A.S.S to seek out Ruhrr in Little Waywyrd One, a tavern in the farmlands south of New Carydam, and assist him with what he requires. Not having a whole lot else going on at the moment, Courtois, Harriet, and Lenny set forth.
It became apparent, upon meeting Ruhrr, that this was a different kind of job. The old druid turned tavernkeeper did not need help slaying those that would abuse and pervert the natural cycle of life, but rather just needed our heroes to work a shift in the tavern for the night. But this is no normal night--this is Moon's Crown, in which the devotees of Haesmer that make up much of Little Waywyrd One's customer base, get their rowdiest, as that is the best way to honor the Shepherd of Laughter on his evening of power. What Ruhrr needs our adventurers to do is to make sure that the evening gets rowdy, but not too rowdy. They need to achieve that perfect balance between "calm" and "rowdy" and will likely have to use a variety of their skillsets to do just that. They'll get 200 gold each for completing the tavern shift, plus a bonus for how well they achieved the level of "controlled chaos" that enables Haesmer to thrive, and thus, this community to thrive along with the Shepherd.
Despite being utterly mystified at the notion of normal work, and completely clueless as to what a "barkeep" does, A.S.S. agreed.

A Rowdy Night

Before the shift began in earnest, our heroes took some time to prepare themselves for the night ahead.

• Harriet pursued the tavern's small library, full of books and material dedicated to Haesmer. There, she learned Shepherd's Lament, which is a surprisingly upbeat song given its title.
• Courtois, ever-vigilant, decided to discuss security tactics with Shardkiln, the very busy cook of the tavern. You don't need your hands to talk, so she put him to work kneading dough during their conversation. Unfortunately, Courtois dough was somehow both too wet and overworked, which brought the mood of the night down a little before it even started.
• Lenny built a small shine to Carida, fashioning dirt and twigs into a tree that approximates the Goddess of Charity and Benevolence's symbol right there on the bar. Povyn, the barkeep, was nonplussed, but this work seemed to earn some favor for Lenny from the goddess. She felt Carida watching her actions.

Preparations complete, the evening started in earnest. The tavern quickly became packed, and our heroes find themselves involved strange and random encounters while completing the basic duties of running food and drink to patrons. During the course of delivering a nice glass of wine, Harriet was asked to strike an artful pose and be sketched by Jailal Glorythorn, as her profile was just perfect for the heroine of the tale. Harriet agreed, and quickly became emmeshed in a long-standing argument between Jailal and her brother, Grammoc. The siblings bickered over a central question posed by Grammoc: why write about or document life when, instead, you could be living it? Jailal looked to Harriet for support and she offered that "the stories of the past must never be forgotten," while simultaneously adding that it is important to live life, too, and that the two were not in opposition. Both Jailal and Grammoc seemed intrigued and pleased by her answers during the informal debate. Harriet found the encounter invigorating, adding a little bit to the magic of the evening.
Courtois, however, found his experience with the wizard Loldolrath to be a little lacking. Loldolrath, it seemed, needed Courtois' help in performing a magical utterance to invoke the Shepherd's favor. The wizard required our fighter to think of his rowdiest memory while Loldolrath spoke the required incantation. The problem, however, is that Courtois isn't rowdy. In fact, he's the opposite of rowdy. But, he had a job to do, so he summoned up the rowdiest memories he could think of, consisting of not brushing a horse and staying out late, while Loldolrath was about his business. Unfortunately, nothing happened. Loldolrath was disappointed with the status quo of the tavern being maintained, but this chronicler could imagine Courtois being a little pleased with the outcome.
Lenny found herself in the middle of a drinking contest early during her shift. The Shepherd, apparently, willed that Lenny participate in the bounty of Shepherd's Keg, a drinking contest designed to honor light, laughter and comradery. Brossal Beatboot, who seemed to be in charge of the proceedings, was happy to make Lenny's acquaintance and the contest began in earnest. Lenny had no trouble navigating the sting of Waywryd's Wallop, a strong ale, and achieved victory in the contest, enlivening the atmosphere slightly. Brossal offered her business card, listing her occupation as psychotherapist, just in case Lenny ever needed to talk.
The first instance of the evening's rowdiness was revealed to be a rowdy bard and his cronies, upset at seemingly (and incorrectly) being upstaged by Harriet. Combat broke out with formerly rowdy customers quickly defeated. It is worth noting that Courtois was careful to knock these combatants out. Lenny, however, didn't get the "don't kill" memo and promptly exploded the hell out of a couple rowdy skulls, clearly contributing to the chaos of the environment.
The night continued and Lenny found herself face-to-face with a strange woman named Alydra Caibalar, drawn there by a connection forged in the sacrifice of body for Meemaw Inkalia (see A.S.S.: Voyage of the Trash Boat). Lenny gave up her left pinky toe, while Alydra seems to have sacrificed her sight. A eerie conversation ensued about the nature of sacrifice, gifts, and benevolence. Throughout it all, Lenny felt the eyes of Carida upon her. Or perhaps that was just the eyes of Izenbras, Alydra's feline companion somehow providing the woman with sight. It was certainly a strange discussion, but Lenny had little time to think on that as the night continued apace.
Given the demand for food and drink, the formidable barkeep Povyn found himself falling behind in orders, so it was A.S.S. to the rescue. Harriet, Courtois and Lenny all pitched in to help deliver the backlog of beverages. Lenny proved most adept at handling the crunch of the crowd while delivering drinks. Harriet gave it a solid effort, helping ease Povyn's obligations. Courtois was no help, perhaps deep in his feelings about all this ruckus. These deliveries allowed Povyn to catch up, and he was grateful to the hired hands.
Just as Courtois was beginning to catch his breath amongst all this rowdiness, a one-eyed dwarf named Yoopscrut approached him unexpectedly and asked him about his shield. It turned out that Yoopscrut is a follower of the blood-eye wolf, Vallik, and seemingly wanted to make sure that Courtois was worthy of his gift. Perhaps welcoming a change in situation, Courtois described his encounter with an avatar of Vallik while sharing his rations with the dwarf. A most amicable encounter.
Contributing to the ongoing rowdiness was the uninvited intrusion of a Giant Boar and Peryton into the tavern. These beasts, driven bonkers by the frivolity, wanted a fight and got one. These foes dispatched, our weary tavern workers had time for a short rest.
And that turned out to be a good thing, as the rowdiness of Little Waywyrd One summoned forth a chosen of Haesmer called Broadbeam and he immediately engaged A.S.S. in "rowdy fisticuffs." The fight was a tough one, with many blows exchanged. Finally, however, Broadbeam was beaten, disappearing in a flash of laughter and radiant energy. In his place was a shepherd's crook with a laughing face carved into it.
Surprising everyone, perhaps including himself, Courtois reached for it and was rewarded with glimpses of the life of a large orange-eyed, raven haired man. Eventually, those images ceased the staff vanished.
The rest of the evening proceeded without notable incident. At the end of their shift, Rurhh gave our heroes each the 200 gold they were promised, plus an extra 300 gold each for their work maintaining an excellent level of rowdiness.
With that, A.S.S headed back to A.S.S HQ, likely eager for the next job to involve less service industry work.

And That's Where We Left It

We'll see what the skein of fate has in store for the Arbos as the annals of A.S.S. continue.

Varied & Sundry Details

• Harriet left her address with Jailal Glorythorn, asking for a copy of the book when it was finished. Jailal promised to send one to her.
• Lenny realized that the questions asked of her during her encounter with Alydra were a kind of test. Could this be sent from Carida?
• Courtois, having grasped the Crook of Laughter, is now of interest to the Shepherd. What might this mean for our fighter, who definitely loves fun and good times?

Character(s) interacted with

• Rurhh, owner and operator of Little Waywyrd One
• Shardkiln, the no-nonsense cook of the public house
• Povyn Fiddlebelch, charming barkeep of Little Waywyrd One
• Jailal Glorythorn, artist and author
• Grammoc Glorythorn, her curmudgeonly brother
• Loldolrath, a wizard
• Fortunand, his "owl"
• Brossal Beatboot, Shepherd's Keg participant and psychoanalyst
• Alydra Caibalar, mysterious blind woman
• Izenbras, her cat
• Broadbeam, Chosen of Haesmer

Notes

Coppermuck's Letter is as follows: Scumrunners! I write to you to ask a favor. My friend Rurhh needs a bit of help. Can you meet him at Little Waywyrd One, a tavern in the farmlands south of New Carydam, on the morning of 21 Ashes? He can pay you for your trouble. I would come, too, but I’m still aboard the Implacable doing all kinds of cool stuff, like the following seems to have been redacted. Later, there is an addendum, clearly written at a different time. Okay, well, somebody told me I couldn’t tell you. But I promise it is both rad and cool. Anyway, please help Rurhh. He’s one of the good ones. Trash 4eva, Coppermuck

Report Date

23 Oct 2022

Primary Location

Little Waywyrd One

Secondary Location

New Carydam