What Really Happened

Life, Identity

Natalya tells Fenneck why and how she killed Staladin.

"Checkmate" Fenneck said as he moved his dragonchess piece forward, beating Natalya for the fifth time that day. "Okay, I'm done." She said, throwing her hands up in defeat. "Sore loser." Fenneck teased her as he started putting the boards away. "Oh come on. You always win. It's not even fun anymore!" She complained, standing up to stretch her legs. "You've said that for years now." He said as he delicately put away the beautiful elvish figures, "You'd think you'd have gotten better by now." He teased her. "Wanna go on a patrol or something? I need to move." Natalya asked as she stretched. "Sure. We can watch the sunset." Fenneck said as he finished putting the board up. They put their gear on and headed out into the wilderness. They walked for a while in silence before Fenneck finally spoke up, "I've been wanting to ask...and we don't have to talk about this if you wish, I understand it probably isn't a pleasant memory. But...I was wondering why you killed Staladin. What prompted you to do such a thing and...and I am curious as to what actually happened. We've heard many different rumors in Glitterfjell." He was looking out into the mountains as he asked her this and they kept walking. "What have you heard?" She asked, genuinely curious and a little scared of Fenneck's judgment. "Well, some say Pufuktin ordered you to do it. That it was an inside job for him to rise to power. I personally think that would be too simple for someone like Pufuktin and I've met you and since ruled that one out." He smiled at her before turning back to the mountains and the setting sun. "Some say you were a crazy witch who liked to sleep with her victims before killing them. Some say you snuck into his chambers and slit his throat and some say you seduced him and murdered him mid-coitus. One particularly gruesome one was that he was strung up and blindfolded naked on his bedposts and stabbed brutally in the neck. Some say he was poisoned. The list goes on." He said. Natalya noticed the way he mentioned the poison and knew that was the answer he wanted. Unfortunately, it wasn't the answer she had for him. She swallowed nervously, "Well, a few nights before it happened I was accompanying Pufuktin to some feast and Staladin was there. At the end of the night, after Pufuktin was...done...with me. He told me that Staladin wanted to spend an evening with me in a couple of nights. Of course Pufuktin couldn't tell Staladin no so when the night came I hid a dagger on my thigh. I made it into Staladin's room and he sent his attendants away. He dropped his robes and I convinced him to let me tie him to the bed posts and blindfold him." She tried to see Fenneck's reactions but he was doing a good job of avoiding her eyes. "Once he was blindfolded I took my dagger and rammed it through his neck. He died instantly." She could tell Fenneck was uncomfortable but she kept going. "I was covered in blood so I took my dress off and stole some of his robes and escaped out the balcony and into an empty garden before I managed to make it onto the streets and all the way to the southern outpost where I found Dimitri." She paused and sighed at the memory, "I told him what happened and he told me to run. To escape into the mountains. So I did." She looked up at Fenneck. His eyes were cold and hard. She felt guilty for causing Fenneck discomfort. He pondered this as they waded through the snow. "Why?" He finally asked, "Why not just stab him? Why...why tie him up like that?" She could tell he found her method grotesque. She sighed, "Two reasons. One is that Staladin was a very powerful warlock and I wasn't sure about the extent of his power. I wanted to incapacitate him as much as possible. If he had a second to react it wouldn't have worked. He would have killed me. I had to make him trust me. To blind him. To remove any margin of potential error." She paused for a moment, "The second reason...is that he deserved it. He deserved to be humiliated. To be murdered not by some great sorcerer or monster but by a nobody whore in the most humiliating way possible. His hubris got the best of him, and I wanted everyone in Lenisily to know that." She said confidently. They kept walking in silence along the mountain ridge before Fenneck finally stopped and turned to look at her. His eyes were still cold but there was a hint of what Natalya hoped was respect in them. "You are the most terrifying person I have ever met." He said, somewhat bewildered. Natalya smiled at him, she enjoyed his reaction. "I'm glad you think so." She said. "No, really." He said, "You're terrifying. I hope to god I never make an enemy of you." She was taken aback a bit by his serious tone. "Well, I doubt that will ever be the case. I didn't do it for personal reasons Fen. I did it because he was a monster. You are one of the most noble persons I have ever met. You have so much good in you." She looked down trying to push the shame she was feeling down, "I don't want you to fear me." Fenneck sighed, "I didn't mean it like that." He took her chin in his hand and lifted her face to meet his gaze. "I don't mean to judge you." He said sadly, "I know I have a tendency to do that sort of thing. I am trying not to. I'm sorry if I offended you." She smiled softly at his apology. He really was the epitome of goodness to Natalya. "I know it's gruesome. I have visions of it all the time in my meditations. I don't rest easy knowing I took him from this earth. Even if he was a demonic warlock who slaughtered his people." She said defensively. "I know." Fenneck said softly, "I can't imagine the pain it must cause you." She sighed a sigh of relief, happy to have finally told Fenneck this dark moment of her past. Suddenly Fenneck became very alert. He drew his bow and fired an arrow over Natalya's shoulder before she had time to react. She heard a piercing shriek and turned to see three small devious little ice monsters. The middle one now had Fenneck's arrow in his chest. It suddenly breathed a cone of ice toward herself and Fenneck. Natalya and Fenneck gracefully rolled out of the way of the blast. Natalya drew her bow as she rolled and fired an arrow at the center one. It shrieked again as her arrow lodged into his side, next to Fenneck's arrow. The one on the left ran toward Fenneck and slashed at his ankle ripping a chunk of fox fur off of his boot. The one on the right came for Natalya but she easily sidestepped it. Fenneck notched two arrows and shot one into the the center one and one into the one on the right attacking Natalya. The center one suddenly burst into shards of ice. Natalya went to fire an arrow at the one about to attack Fenneck but her bow string snapped as a shard of ice pierced it and the arrow fell short into the snow. "Damn it!" She said. The one about to attack Fenneck jumped to claw him but Fenneck gracefully kicked him midflight and sent him falling down the side of the mountain. Fenneck drew an arrow and shot the creature in the head as it fell causing it to explode in mid air. The other jumped up at Natalya but she gracefully dodged out of the way. Fenneck drew another arrow and shot the creature in the side. It let out a shriek and turned toward Fenneck. Natalya took her bow and swiped at the beast sending it down into the chasm it's buddy had fallen into. Natalya and Fenneck looked down and watched it explode like the others had. "The hell were those?" Natalya asked. "Ice mephits." Fenneck said informatively, "They aren't native to this plane but they have been known to sneak in occasionally." Natalya looked down at her damaged bow. "I can restring it when we get back to the cave." Fenneck said. "We should head back anyway, it's getting late." They made their way back to the cave and Natalya started working on dinner while Fenneck worked on repairing her bow. "You never answered the other part of my question." He said as he delicately strung the bow. "Which part?" Natalya asked. "The why. Why did you do it? I know the whole 'he was a bad person' thing, but I want to know what changed in your mind after being a dedicated KAV soldier for over a hundred years." Natalya thought for a moment as she stirred the rabbit stew. "One day I had a job in the mining town on the northern border of Lenisily. While I was there I...I finally started to see the reality that was Lenisily. It was a dark, sad town. Women were being raped in the streets and the air was full of smoke and this...pungent smell. I followed the source to this clearing in the forest where I saw a pit of bodies, mostly half-elves being burned by this sickly purple and black fire. Above the pit was Staladin surrounded by some of the generals from the KAV, including Pufuktin. He had his hands raised above the pit as if it was a sacrifice or something. I snuck out of there hoping they wouldn't catch me and tried to make it to the southern outpost to see Dimitri but on my way there I...I tripped and fell into the snow." She took a deep breath, "I sat there and cried for hours. Finally as the sun was starting to rise I..." She hesitated for a moment before continuing, "I felt a large snowflake fall into my hand...As I looked at its beauty and intricacies I...I just...I felt a sense of..." She struggled to find the right words. "A sense of understanding." Fenneck helped her, "An understanding of the balance of the universe. Of good and evil." He said knowingly. Natalya looked up at him confused and nodded. Fenneck looked down solemnly, "You shouldn't have told me that." He said quietly. "What do you mean?" Natalya asked him, confused by his weird behavior. He looked like he was struggling and in pain of some sort. "Fen?" He slowly looked up at her, "Have you ever heard of epiphanies?" He asked her. She was confused, "I know what the word epiphany means if that's what you're asking me." She said. Fenneck shook his head, "No, epiphanies. It's...it's an elvish...thing. For lack of a better word. Every elf should experience it at some point in their lives. It's a very private thing between an elf and their gods." He said cautiously, "Normally one does not discuss it with others, even their children or lovers." Natalya felt a sense of shame rise up in her for telling Fenneck. Fenneck saw this, "No, look, it's okay. I...thank you." He looked her in the eyes compassionately. "Thank you for sharing such an important moment of your life with me. I don't mean to shame you...you didn't know." She swallowed and nodded, still a bit confused. "I feel like I know nothing about elvish customs or culture." She said. Fenneck smiled at her, "I'm more than happy to share my knowledge with you on such subjects." He seemed a little too excited, "I know it's a lot and Lenisily didn't allow you to grow up with it. I have some books here I could show you. One of them discusses epiphanies, after dinner let me read some to you." Natalya nodded and worked on finishing the stew. After the stew was done and her bow was beautifully repaired, Natalya fixed them both a bowl and she curled up under their furs with Fenneck. They sat next to each other as he read to her about epiphanies and elvish customs. Occasionally he would show her the pages and their arms would rest against each other sending a comforting flutter of butterflies through her stomach. Natalya enjoyed learning about the old ways of elves. She especially loved recognizing the ways Fenneck implemented them in his own life. He was very dedicated to his culture and faith and Natalya found it admirable and found herself wishing she had faith in these gods and ideas as well. They ended up discussing religion, the elvish deity Corellon, culture, politics, and nature into the dawn. By the morning they were laying down next to each other looking up at the apple tree branching out above them. "So yes, in that school of thought, we are reincarnated versions of ourselves on the constant path to perfection." Fenneck said thoughtfully. Natalya pondered this, "So if that's the case, would thiramins always be the same? Were we meant to always find each other, no matter the paths or journey's our lives would take us on?" Fenneck thought for a moment, "I don't know. It's a nice thought though." He turned on his side to look at Natalya. She turned her head to look at him. He studied her thoughtfully for a while, "You know...I don't hate our situation. I know it's not what I thought it would be but...we've been able to help so many people thanks to this." He smiled softly at her, "I...I also enjoy your company...Even if you do scare the shit out me." He teased. Natalya smiled and laughed softly, "Me too. I think I felt way too much pressure when I first met you to...to just be myself. I felt like I had to be perfect for you." She looked back up at the apples and smiled, "I prefer this. It's easier." Fenneck smiled and laid back down, "Me too." He said looking up at the ceiling. Slowly Natalya noticed the apple above her start to lower itself on a vine. She reached up and plucked it from the air. "Good morning." Fenneck smiled as the warm glow of the sun broke through the entrance. "Thought you'd like some breakfast." He looked over at her smiling from his trick. She made eye contact with him as she bit into the apple causing him to look away annoyed. "Well played." He said. They giggled and drifted off into their meditations laying on the floor next to each other.