G. Gnormand Gnomanclature III
Doctor Gee Gnormand Gnomenclature
One of the most vaunted of the professors that proudly served under the various roofs of the various colleges on The Bardic College Campus, Doctor Gee Gnormand Gnomanclature, PhD., LSD, MDMA, THC, DPsi., was a force to be reckoned with as a teacher. Despite his small stature Gnomish height, Professor Gnomenclature could bellow like a bison with a bullhorn, and scared almost all of his students silly. Especially the first term students. Well, all of his students, really. Except the one.
The professor will not speak that red-headed lad's name in public.
Hailing from Marketoon, where later professor Gnomenclature would often vacation, basking in the luxury of his parents' estate, this consummate teaching professional was known as a liturgical purist. He could quote the classics, line for line, and was a mean mint-julep muddler, come horse racing season. To be quite fair, he was a bartender in college, and was something of a girl-drink-drunk, himself. He quite enjoyed a good pipeful of shredded moonflower and hibiscus, and a snort or two of the 'good snuff' was always welcome by the stout old Gnomish man. Yet, for all of his many faults, this cantankerous academic really loved both his job and his students. His gruff exterior was merely a front for an overly full heart, and too many of his 'brain-dead tutoronomies' would offer as little effort as possible, and then get angry and caustically insulting when their work was of failing quality. To those students who showed any sign of interest, any sign of being invested in the work of a true academic, the professor was a mentor and advocate with the school.
Professor Gnomenclature's greatest academic achievement, however, was the re-discovery of the technique used to create the psi-crystals of antiquity; those quartz and amethyst devices that could record sound, smell, and video. He could never work out how to properly make the user perceive touch or temperature, but he did manage to record an entire summer tour schedule of the famous tortle music group out of The Bardic League, Terrapin Isle.* This sparked a whole debate about intellectual property, and musician's rights to their music etc., etc. Terrapin Isle, musicians whose trade in stock is an improvisational tapestry of shared energy, saw it this way: 'The shows are never the same, ever. It's just a moment. So, when we are done with them, y'all are more than welcome to them.' This was in stark contrast to another popular musical group out of the Kingdom of Cotnor calling themselves the Metalpop Lights. Their drummer, Lars, became a vocal advocate for monetary exchange anytime a psi-crystal was listened to or experienced, saying they deserved to be paid each time one of their psi-crystals was even accessed. Professor Gnomenclature called Lars a 'pompous jackass', getting into a physical altercation with him at one point when the Metalpops were touring in Greynor. Eyes opened by the social interactions of the Terrapin Isle fans, or perhaps the psilocybin tea the group's enthusiasts regularly partook of, Professor Gnomenclature began hunting for the secret to happiness. His research became his lifeblood and his sustenance, spending most waking hours working to unravel the mystery of universal happiness, and why it seems so bloody elusive. Hailing from a wealthy family, he knew money was not the secret answer; nor was the sex with random adults. He spent years feverishly researching how to help the general population just be happy, for a change. He did in fact make huge advances in the Social Sciences, linking his research to corresponding ancient manuscripts, methodically tracking the happiest moments in historical people's lives. It was he who discovered and first synthesized methylenedioxy-methamphetamine, using only himself as a test subject until he perfected the technique used to create it. He created a frankly astoundingly effective regimen of 'microdosing', with psilocybin extracted from mushrooms, to treat the chronically depressed, releasing a white paper on the differing brain chemistries of the various ethnicities attending the college quite soon thereafter. When the professor retired, there was a campus-wide kegger sponsored by the Dean of the entire school.
It was a rager.
The professor will not speak that red-headed lad's name in public.
Hailing from Marketoon, where later professor Gnomenclature would often vacation, basking in the luxury of his parents' estate, this consummate teaching professional was known as a liturgical purist. He could quote the classics, line for line, and was a mean mint-julep muddler, come horse racing season. To be quite fair, he was a bartender in college, and was something of a girl-drink-drunk, himself. He quite enjoyed a good pipeful of shredded moonflower and hibiscus, and a snort or two of the 'good snuff' was always welcome by the stout old Gnomish man. Yet, for all of his many faults, this cantankerous academic really loved both his job and his students. His gruff exterior was merely a front for an overly full heart, and too many of his 'brain-dead tutoronomies' would offer as little effort as possible, and then get angry and caustically insulting when their work was of failing quality. To those students who showed any sign of interest, any sign of being invested in the work of a true academic, the professor was a mentor and advocate with the school.
Professor Gnomenclature's greatest academic achievement, however, was the re-discovery of the technique used to create the psi-crystals of antiquity; those quartz and amethyst devices that could record sound, smell, and video. He could never work out how to properly make the user perceive touch or temperature, but he did manage to record an entire summer tour schedule of the famous tortle music group out of The Bardic League, Terrapin Isle.* This sparked a whole debate about intellectual property, and musician's rights to their music etc., etc. Terrapin Isle, musicians whose trade in stock is an improvisational tapestry of shared energy, saw it this way: 'The shows are never the same, ever. It's just a moment. So, when we are done with them, y'all are more than welcome to them.' This was in stark contrast to another popular musical group out of the Kingdom of Cotnor calling themselves the Metalpop Lights. Their drummer, Lars, became a vocal advocate for monetary exchange anytime a psi-crystal was listened to or experienced, saying they deserved to be paid each time one of their psi-crystals was even accessed. Professor Gnomenclature called Lars a 'pompous jackass', getting into a physical altercation with him at one point when the Metalpops were touring in Greynor. Eyes opened by the social interactions of the Terrapin Isle fans, or perhaps the psilocybin tea the group's enthusiasts regularly partook of, Professor Gnomenclature began hunting for the secret to happiness. His research became his lifeblood and his sustenance, spending most waking hours working to unravel the mystery of universal happiness, and why it seems so bloody elusive. Hailing from a wealthy family, he knew money was not the secret answer; nor was the sex with random adults. He spent years feverishly researching how to help the general population just be happy, for a change. He did in fact make huge advances in the Social Sciences, linking his research to corresponding ancient manuscripts, methodically tracking the happiest moments in historical people's lives. It was he who discovered and first synthesized methylenedioxy-methamphetamine, using only himself as a test subject until he perfected the technique used to create it. He created a frankly astoundingly effective regimen of 'microdosing', with psilocybin extracted from mushrooms, to treat the chronically depressed, releasing a white paper on the differing brain chemistries of the various ethnicities attending the college quite soon thereafter. When the professor retired, there was a campus-wide kegger sponsored by the Dean of the entire school.
It was a rager.
*Music is omniplanar; many folks on our own POE would call the music of Terrapin Isle oddly familiar to the Grateful Dead
Alignment
Lawful/Neutral
Current Status
Deceased
Current Location
Species
Ethnicity
Other Ethnicities/Cultures
Professions
Date of Birth
22 Tophor
Date of Death
19 Embers
Circumstances of Birth
Born to a well-to-do family of engineers and social workers
Circumstances of Death
Old age, surrounded by friends and family, with a national "Death Watch" ordered by the High King himself.
Birthplace
Place of Death
Children
Pronouns
He/Him/Professor/Doctor
Gender
male
Eyes
A little too large and spaced a bit too far apart, bright green
Hair
balding, red
Skin Tone/Pigmentation
A swarthy skinned gnome of means
Height
3'4"
Weight
73 lbs.
Belief/Deity
Tyr
Aligned Organization
Other Affiliations
Comments