The Troubles at Silverpass

Part One:

"Go ahead, Ranger...range."
- Bast to the Ranger, Aimon Tardi

Meeting in a tavern (as adventurers are want to do), Cersa, Aimon, and Bast set out into the Silverwood together. Each adventurer has received a retainer fee of 100gp, with 400gp to be paid upon completion of their task. Should they survive.
Investigating the Hunter's Lodge, with whom the city has lost contact, the party found the Ranger's headquarters in ruins. Bodies lay scattered around the Lodge grounds, and an entire wall destroyed. Following a strange set of tracks leading from the lodge the party discovered a standing stone guarded by a unique owlbear who became protective of the unconscious humanoid figure collapsed beneath it. The party parlayed with this creature and awoke the exhaused Hunter Ilaris Gerel. Ilaris explained these standing stones are a special marker called a Leystone, a magically infused structure that indicates a conflux of arcane Leylines that run beneath the forest. Ilaris and the owlbear (Westie) described that some malevolent force burrowed its way into this Leyline network, and it's presence has tainted and possessed the creatures of the wood including the forest spirit creatures that protect the Leystones.

Part Two:

"This seems like a trap..."
- Cersa, before being ambushed by goblins

Along the way, Cersa, Aimon, and Bast were joined by the elven fighter Angrammas.
During an investigation of a ruined watchtower, the party was ambushed by a group of Goblins wielding a particularly nasty crossbow. The party defeated the lil' shits and took on of their number as...hostage? Slave? Mail-Order-Bride? Jury's still out, but the goblin known as Spleek is none too thrilled about it. Spleek tells the party that his gang infiltrated the Silverwood under the leadership of a goblin called Skrank the Sneaky. They are currently holed up in a series of caves along the eastern walls.
The party set out to investigate these corrupted Leystone Guardians. They encountered and defeated the giant wasp known as Stuzz'm, the owlbear called Oru, and a massive Elk who did battle with their own sibling. As the party slew these creatures, their spirits were released and the Leystones were cleansed.
The party investigated a landmark known as Aerowen's Fingers, a set of 4 ancient Leystones in the center of the forest. This area appeared as a scorched crater, clearly the epicenter of the explosion. Inspecting the area surrounding the Fingers, the party discovered an out-of-place looking artifact: some kind of inorganic shard covered in arcane runes of unknown make. They pocketed that shit. Further studying Aerowen's Fingers, the party discovered various glowing lights that appeared to represent the status of the 7 Leystones that dot the forest.
Two Leystone markers emit a sickly red light, while one dimly flickers.

Part Three:

"I use minor illusion to make Spleek look like a...a monkey."
- Bast

The party was awoken by Aimon, who had spotted a shrouded figure around the perimeter of camp. The party tracked this figure along the road headed towards the city. The party followed the figure into the great Elevator, and gave chase once the figure attempted to escape into the streets of Silverpass. After some...persuading...the figure revealed himself to be a spy in the employ of a Silverpass noble named Lord Roald. The spy was instructed to monitor the party's movements in Silverpass and the Silverwood, specifically the movements of Aimon Tardi. Learning that the spy was to meet with an anonymous agent of Lord Roald in two days to deliver his report and receive payment of 1,200gp, the party cleverly convinced the spy to deliver false information and surrender his payment to them.

While in town, the party visited the magic curio shop Arcane Antiquities to have items identified. There they met Master Saalm, the wizard proprietor and his young ward Bim. They also visited the smithy The Silverhammer and picked up some additional gear.
The party was also accosted by six thugs. They got turned inside out.
Out in the wilds, the party stumbled upon a friendly group of adventurers who were willing to share some of their spoils. One of these adventurers, a half-orc war veteran named Rourke, challenged Angrammas to a fistfight to claim these trinkets. After narrowly besting Rourke, the party walked away with a Flask of Everhealing.
Upon entering the festering marshlands called Dorr's Swamp, the party met an obnoxious mud mephit named Glhkhghk who offered to guide them through the treacherous swamp. The lil fucker was definitely up to no good, and as such the party decided to avoid the ball of mud and skirt around the swamp.
On the road the party encountered another patrol of skeletons led by a cloaked and staff-wielding undead. These creatures, however, were no match for the party. Upon closer inspection, the cloaked figure's apparel seemed eerily similar to the kind worn by the Hunter's Guild, and bore a brooch inscribed with a similar but more ornate sigil of a stag's head.

Part Four:

"Aw please don't break my butt bones, them's my most defining feature!"
- Gary the Skeleman

Upon waking up, the party discovered that their goblin captive, Spleek, has secretly been able to slip loose his restraints at will. After being caught, Spleek explains that he has a better chance at survival by sticking with the party.

The party then continued their trek into the marshland called Dorr's Swamp. They located a leystone on a series of small swamp islands, surrounded by large crocodiles. Eventually, the leystone guardian revealed itself as a massive crocodile. After defeating this creature, the corrupted energy of the leystone was dispelled.

The party came across a number of freshly risen skeletons picking on one of their own. Defeating these bullies, the party met the amiable undead called Gary. Gary told the party that he was recently risen by a spooky scary voice, but didn't want to be a bad guy and was able to resist the voice's thrall. Gary joined the party on one condition: don't break his butt bones...

The party then made their way to the northernmost stone, where they encountered some kind of undead golem-like creature doing battle with a wood woad called Mosscloak. Assisting the woad, the party made short work of the creature. Mosscloak told the party that despite their efforts it feels as if the sickness of the forest is getting worse. The woad tells the party that they should continue in their task regardless, and move on to the final corrupted leystone.

Part Five:

"These guys don't know Goblin Obama. Globama."
- Spleek

The party set out to cleanse the last leystone, located to the East. En route to their destination they encountered three Warg Riders who rose north. The party managed to stay out of sight, and the group moved on. Remembering that the goblins here were on the hunt for a so called treasure cache, the party decided to make a detour and track the riders.

The party came to a clearing at the base of Argent Peak, and found signs of battle. Two well equipped corpses, freshly slain, laid in front of a set of green flamed braziers. Investigating, the party found the pair's orders and a device called an arcanolock. Angrammas' investigation of the braziers revealed an illusory door that led into a series of caverns.

Inside the caves the party discovered more of these braziers spread throughout the caverns. One of these braziers had a corpse nearby with a horribly burned hand. In their last moments, the unfortunate adventurer scrawled "Not Here" into the brazier's base. Soon after this discovery, the party was accosted by a Grick, whom the party had seen brief evidence of before. The wormyboi had no chance.

The party continued their spelunking, eventually coming across another brazier that served as a impromptu campfire, complete with rugged spit and kettle. This makeshift camp had two tents, one torn and collapsed, the other empty. The party found a journal describing two adventurers who also had heard of a treasure cache in the forest, and snuck past the Hunter's Guild rangers to find this place.

Venturing forth, the party encountered one of the Warg Riders: Festus, Skrank's Slavemaster. The nasty little fuck seemed to be alone in his investigation of the cave. The party swiftly imploded him. And then fed his corpse to a cave fisher. The cave fisher liked that.

The party discovered another brazier, and again it was Angrammas who discovered an illusion. The flames of the brazier where illusory, concealing a mechanism in it's base that revealed a hidden door. This door led to a nondescript stone hallway that bore a locked and seemingly invulnerable door at its end. Only when Gary the Skeleman unwittingly stumbled backwards through the entrance did the party discover the means of egress from this illusory hall. The party entered into a massive cylindrical chamber illuminated by yet more green braziers, and festooned with alcoves hewn into the stone walls. The party was met with by the uncomfortable sensation of someone attempting to pry into their thoughts, and heard the wheezing whispers of some unseen entity. Investigating the room further the party was drawn to a pair of large ornate chests. When Cersa attempted to pick the lock of one of these chests, their true nature as a pair of particularly large and wily mimics was revealed. After exchanging a few blows (and almost consuming Cersa entirely) the two creatures were called off by the voice of the whispering entity, who soon manifested themselves to the party. The hooded figure spoke telepathically to the party, and the two sides reached a détente...

Exposition Dump:

The figure explained that he was a purveyor of magic items, and offered to trade with the party provided they had magic items themselves to bargain with. While the party took inventory, the figure explained what they theorized was happening to the world outside:

Somehow, the spirit of a long dead minor Lich named Kyzarak the Unclean has wormed its way into the Silverwood's Leylines. It is building its strength in hopes of being able to possess a temporary body, and then use the Leywell as a means of siphoning the life of every living thing in the Silverwood. The shrouded figure believes that the only way to defeat this foe is to destroy whatever vessel it finds for itself. The figure also expressed an extreme disdain for this particular Lich.

Part Six:

"I hate everything about this."
- Cersa, remarking on the metric fuck-ton of spiders

The party left the cave of their new wizard friend of his two mimic pets, following Worg tracks to the base of the mountain trail that leads to the top of Argent Peak. After brief deliberation the party decides against tracking Skrank up the mountain, and resume their task of cleansing the last leystone.

The party found the last leystone in a shadow portion of the forest thick with spider webs. The leystone itslef was encased in a thick shell of webbing, and a number of giant spiders crawled about the area. The party deleted these eight-legged monstrosities, as well as a number of spider swarms, a phase spider, and one half of a pair of Ettercaps. The remaining Ettercap managed to scurry away, the only survivor of the extermination.

Once the last stone was cleansed, hell broke loose. A wave of thunderous necrotic energy swept through the forest, uprooting trees and cleaving mounds of earth in twain. The blast rocked the cliffside section of Silverpass, destroying the great elevator that connects the city to the forest. Soon thereafter, our villain introduced himself: Kyzarak the Unclean. He cackled and mocked the party because he's a twat. Through nefarious dark magics the former Lich created a horde of undead servants that filtered through the forest. The party moved to regroup with Mosscloak, and successfully evaded a number of these undead patrols.

Mosscloak was beside himself, and offered little guidance other than that the party must ascend to the top of the mountain and enter the Oakborn Enclave, the ancestral headquarters of the Oakborn Circle. Mosscloak remembered a secret passage in a nearby cave that will assist the party in their climb. This tunnel bypasses a collapsed and treacherous section of the mountain trail. The party met again with their becloaked wizard friend (whom the party learned from Mosscloak is a mage who goes by the name Old One Eye) and after some brief conversation and bartering the secret passage was revealed.

The party stepped into the maw of this unknown tunnel, and then the camera freeze-framed and Roundabout by Yes played.

Part Seven:

"So you do that every time? You disappear, talk to an old guy, and he sends you back?"
- Angrammas, after teleporting via fey step

The party ascended the damp tunnels that gradually became chillier and chillier. They were deposited on a snowy outcropping halfway up the mountain. They soon located the trail and continued their trek until they came upon an cave along the trail. Investigating, they were ambushed by Skrank the Sneaky and his bugbear lieutenant Grustus, as well as their two Worg mounts. As the party did battle with these goblinoids, the owner of this cave dwelling returned: an Ice Troll. The two sides formed a cease-fire and teamed up against this monstrous creature. After defeating their foe (and leaving only Skrank alive), the party let Skrank escape with his life. Surely this will not have consequences.

Traveling forth, the party made their way to a icy cavern, which was home to a nest of dog sized, eight legged, smelly lizards who slumbered in a big gross pile. Cersa encased these beasts in a shroud of darkness, and the party was able to sneak past them, navigate a short climb, and escape the cave. They then came upon a 15ft wide chasm that bore the remains of a long dilapidated rope bridge. Cersa utilized her arcane abilities again and used mage hand to tie the remnants of the bridge back together. When Bast used fey step to transport Angrammas across the chasm, the elf was briefly detoured and ended up in a dark chamber occupied by a mysterious human mage. Both parties were confused. The mage sent Angrammas on his way. It was weird.

The party finally ascended to the top of the mountain, where the entrance to the Oakborn Enclave was guarded by two awakened trees and two wights, who all got their shit rocked. The party then did the fusion dance on the pedestals outside and opened the door. As they walked into the darkness beyond the door, Roundabout by Yes played once again, but it was the bass boosted version.

Part Eight:

"Shit..."
- Aimon Tardi, as a wall of vines animate and grab him.

The party descended into the ruins of the Oakborn Enclave. They managed to open the sanctum door by watching a timer count down and listening to DMX. They also fought a tree. Upon entering, they were accosted by undead whom they dispatched with relative ease. The party began to explore the West Wing of the complex, briefly scouting out rooms before moving on. They found a room where skeletons and bushes fought to the death. Also there was a weird moldy dog thing. They didn't go in that room. They also came across a pack of ghouls snacking on ancient desiccated medical waste. Gross. One of these ghouls fled the scene, unknowingly aggro'ing a group of those moldy dogbois. The party defeated these creatures and discovered a large cavern with a shriveled tree in the middle of a pond. This pond featured pedestals similar to those used to activate the front door. Exploring this chamber more, they discovered a strange ritual chamber that featured a writhing vine covered ceiling. Upon paging through ancient texts, it was discovered that this room was where the Oakborn Druids created Wood Woads. Spleek saw a shiny new dagger and tried to steal it. Angrammas told the little shit that the dagger was cursed, and he dropped it. The dagger is now in Cersa's inventory. Gee, I wonder what that perception check she rolled while leaving the room was for? Huh. Guess we'll never know!

The party found a strange alcove covered in vines, that animated and consumed any living creature that came into contact with them. The party was harmlessly transported through the vines to a hidden chamber. This chamber was the hidden home of a small colony of myconids, who communed with the party via their giant shroom-tree.

The party tripped their absolute shit.

The party then discovered another vine-wall that led to the greenhouse, where they encountered the skeleton/bush/dogthing fight. The victors of this battle, a few animated shrubs, attacked the party.

Being bushes, the did not put up much of a fight. Because they were, in fact, bushes.

Also Cersa found a "diamond" the size of a grapefruit. It looks like a lump of coal to everyone else. Goofs ensued.

The party returned to their lil' shroombois and set up camp, enjoying the rare "safe spot in a dungeon for a long rest".

Part Nine:

"Ok, this might be stupid...but here goes..."
-Aimon, just before turning a hallway into a giant cheese-grater and reducing a dozen zombies into goop

The party awoke refeshed under the spore-y canopy of the shroomtree and then resumed their journey. Upon exploring the east wing, the party was met with the apparent living quarters of the druids. At the end of a tediously long hallway the party spied two wights guarding a door and talking amongst themselves. The party prepared for a long-range battle, and did their best artillery cannon impression by overwhelming the two goons with incredible firepower. The two wights (barely) survived the onslaught and alerted the 12 zombies that idled in the bunk-rooms. While Angrammas and Bast held the front line, Cersa and Spleek took out the two wights, revealing some sort of creature locked in the room beyond that really wanted to get out. Aimon, not to be outdone, used spike growth to whittle away (literally) the horde of zombies.

After attempting to parlay with the mysterious creature beyond the door, the party was attacked by a large, frenzied, worm ridden husk of a person. The creature was killed. Twice. After the second one, the party caught wise and light his ass on fire, but not before using the Disc of Yeeting to paint the fucking ceiling with the guts of a thousand worms. Also Spleek go KO'd but it's cool, Angrammas gave him a lil' sippy from the Flask of Everhealing.

The party searched the Archdruid's chamber, discovering an ancient bronze key and a secret passage that Bast surveyed, revealing more than he expected:

Beyond this hidden tunnel was a window into a massive chamber that housed the fabled leywell, as Big Stinky K hisself, Kyzarak the Unclean.

The party inspected the stone door at the northern end of the central cloister, and discovered it required four keys to open. Angrammas accidentally solved a puzzle by donating to the ASPCA the bowl held by the statue of Aerowen Oakborn in the center of the chamber. An additional Key as well as a bronze tree statuette were revealed by the statue.

The party returned to the west wing and investigated the two shrine rooms. Angrammas, riding high on his superior puzzle solving skills, solved the Pyramid of Life puzzle in like four fucking seconds and netted the party another key. In the next chamber, Bast, Angrammas, and Aimon communed with beast totems of a Mountain Lion, Bear, and Owl respectively. They each aced their trials, revealing a final key as well as inspiration.

All that was left to do was unlock the door and face the Prince of Prolapses, Kyzarak the Unclean.

PSYCH, ONE MORE PUZZLE!

The party entered a chamber lined with Leystones, who were cloaked in crackling arcane energy. A crystalline staff in the center of the room would occasionally attract and disperse these arcing bolts of leyline power. Bast fuckin' got this, and instructed Gary to use the staff to discharge the energy at the gem in the center of the door. He did. Door is now unlocked. Beyond this portal lies their final goal.

Kill Kyzarak the Unclean. Party hard.

Part Ten: Finale

"Cersa, maybe you hang back and just start blasting?"
"That has literally been my plan this entire time..."
Angrammas to Cersa, moments prior to confronting Kyzarak

The party took a "moment" to devise a strategy to defeat the psudeo-lich Kyzarak the Unclean. Because Aimon has the ability to turn a 40sqft area into a fucking chipper-shredder, they aimed to use this to whittle down Kyzarak's minions, opening a window to apply sweet DEEPS on the big bad himself. Or at least I think that was the plan...

Like all dickhead megalomaniacal mages are want to do, Kyzarak welcomed the party with E X P O S I T I O N and then after saying a bunch of shit about his wiener, the final fight began proper.

Kyzarak periodically siphoned energy from the leywell itself, using it to heal his wounds and redirect the volatile forces into damaging offensive abilities. The minions of Kyzarak proved formidable, tying up the party significantly.

 Cersa, Aimon, and Spleek all ding-dong-ditched at death's door a number of times, but ultimately were able to muster enough energy to avoid going to the light.

 When things seemed dire, an old ally in the form of the venerable wood-woad Mosscloak appeared to assist, bringing Cersa and Spleek back from the brink. He also just fuckin' bitch slapped a corrupted Woad into a pit. Mosscloak suffers no bitch.

Utilizing the in-game-meta-gaming artifact known as the Scrybone, the party ascertained that Kyzarak was well within acceptable nuking parameters, and Bast used the Ring of the Grammarian to cast BIG SLEEP, a modified spell that functioned as the infamous spell Power Word: Kill.

It worked.

Kyzarak's essence was expelled from the body of Aeroen Oakborn, and his spectral form was consumed by the Leywell itself, transforming him into a raging being of pure arcane energy that flailed wildly. This destabilization of the Leywell initated the collapsed of the chamber, and the entire Oakborn Enclave itself.

The party escaped the collapsing ruin, and were met with a Silverwood that had fundamentally changed. Fissures of glowing energy webbed throughout the forest, suffusing the entire valley in a soft blue light.

The party returned to Silverpass, greeted as heroes, and the Lord-Mayor saw fit to grant the adventurers two considerable bonuses:
doubling their reward fee to 1,000gp
A fucking house.

The only thing that stands between the party and a night of legendary drinking and whoring is the most feared enemy in all of the Realm: Paperwork.

Allies

• Spleek, Goblin Warrior. Captured by the party after a failed ambush, Spleek sticks around because the party hasn't killed him yet and it's dangerous to go alone: take this shitty goblin!
• Gary the Skeleman. A recently risen skeleton who just wants friends, Gary is a jack of all trades who is eager to help. He has a phenomenal ass, or at least that's what his skeletal structure would suggest.
• Ilaris Gerel, Chief Scout. Ilaris is the last surviving member of the Hunter's Guild. He is resting nearby the Lodge at a leystone, keeping an eye out for the creature that destroyed his friends.
• Westie, Leystone Guard. This unique owlbear is bound to the Western Leystone.
• Mosscloak, Leystone Guard. The oldest of the Leystone Guardians, this aged wood woad is the only known of his kind to speak any language.
• Old One-Eye. This creepy cloaked figure trades magic items, and possesses significant arcane proficiency. He has two creepy mimics of prodigious size, Hocus and Pocus. He has beef with Kyzarak.

Points of Interest

• A goblin gang led by a vicious goblin called Skrank the Sneaky have infiltrated the forest and are on the trail of a cache of treasure. They believe this treasure somewhere along the northern wall of the valley. This hoard is supposedly property of a wizard, or so says the captive from whom Skrank wrested this information.
• A Silverpassian noble called Lord Roald had dispatched a spy to surveil the movements of the party, more specifically the movements of Aimon Tardi. The spy was an independent contractor, and offers no further insight.
• The powerful crossbow Point of the Tooth exudes some kind of fiendish influence, which seemed to have had some effect on Spleek when he had been carrying it. He seems to have since recovered, though hasn't spoken of his experience. This weapon has manifested a business-card printed that bears the name of "Sraktkenzekaal, Eighth of the Burning Line - Deputy Assistant to the Sub-Regional Manager of Interplanar Relations and Acquisitions", as well as causing Aimon to hallucinate briefly. Creepy.