Nebulfungo

Ladies and Gentlemen, friends and neighbors, gather 'round! Since last I visited my favorite town, I have traveled throughout the land seeking the finest potions, lotions, and tonics to help improve your health and life. I have crossed the Children and explored the land of Tygers, where I sampled the Tyger Blood and know its worth. I have entered the Forbidden Valley, evading the elves to bring home a cutting of the Good Berry bush; I have parlayed with the Dwarves of Silverbeard Mountain to gain access to the Dwarvish Whiskey.

But that pales in comparison to the wonder I bring to you today. Step right up and witness the marvel of the Underdark, the secret to the long lives and power of those below, the mystical remedy that will cure all your ills - the Nebulfungo!

Cast aside your ills and infirmities and enter a world of health and vigor, all thanks to this magical mushroom elixir! Guaranteed to clear your mind and bolster your body, you will experience newfound energy lost since your childhood. The Nebulfungo is no ordinary mushroom, my friends! These rare specimens can only be found deep in the Underdark, past the Great Underground Empire, in the lands controlled by the misty gnomes. At those depths, the Nebulfungo is life for the gnomes, providing everything they need to survive in the dark. But here in the sun, the Nebulfungo does so much more.

Are you feeling tired, worn down, ground to nothing by the drudgery of life? Fear not, for the Nebulfungo Elixir will restore your energy and rejuvenate your spirit, giving you a zest for life you haven't felt for years. But that's not all! For everything it does for the body, it does the same or more for the mind! Imagine going forth with the body of a warrior and the mind of a wizard, ready to take on any challenge!

I'm sure you all can recognize the wonder that is before you - please, form an orderly queue to the left, and we will make sure everyone gets a bottle of the Elixir and enjoys the good health that comes with it. Some of you may be skeptical, of course, as other less scrupulous traders have passed through here and damaged your trust. I understand, friends, but I assure you that you will find no problems here - the Nebulfungo Elixir has been proven effective in towns across the land by satisfied customers like you.

So come forth, brave souls! Act now, and embrace a life of wellness and vitality. With a single dose of the Elixir, you will begin a journey into a life of health, wealth, and happiness, limited only by what you desire. When you choose the Nebulfungo Elixir, you are not choosing just a remedy, but rather tapping into the secrets of the adventurous in the hunt for a brighter tomorrow!

— Stefan Drake, Travelling Salesman
Sales pitch given in Custone, 882 Af.

Summary

The Nebelfungo mushroom is a staple of life in the deep areas of the Underdark. The caps are a primary food source, with protein equivalent to an equal weight of beef and a flavor similar but more earthy. The stalks are fibrous and are the most common textile made in the Underdark. Some specific compounds found in the ribs of the cap have medicinal properties, although the amount necessary to have a real effect is significantly more than what anyone would consume. The compounds can be distilled into effective potions, although for most there are cheaper and easier alternatives.

Because the mushroom grows only in the depths of the Underdark, few on the surface know much about it. Around 800 Af., a group of traders from Sulae mounted an expedition to the Underdark, seeking to create trade relations. While they were rejected by most of the denizens, violently in some cases, they did come across a tribe of gnomes that was willing to work with them. The gnomes were quite poor and had little to provide other than the Nebelfungo. The Sulaen's agreed to trade for the mushrooms, having learned of the medicinal uses the gnomes had for them. The mushroom became quite trendy in the city, with the wealthy adding it to everything and crediting it for improvements in their health. The Sulaens attempted to grow their own, but found that they were unable to get the mushrooms to propagate. The appetite for the mushrooms soon became so much that the tribe of gnomes could not maintain the supply. The Sulaens sent out war bands to capture the tribe and the source, and ended up wiping the tribe out to the last gnome. This happened before the Sulaens could learn how to properly grow the mushroom, and by 850 Af. the supply was completely depleted.

Since then, various con artists have taken to selling "mushroom elixir", purported to be made from the Nebelfungo. Some may have traces of it, but the overwhelming majority are common mushrooms finely chopped and formed into a slurry. These "'Shroom Sellers" have a poor reputation in cities and spend most of their time traveling from village to village, selling elixir and leaving before anyone complains.

Spread

The myth of the Nebelfungo is spread by credulous purchasers, con artists, and bards spinning fantastical tales.

Many peddlers work in groups, helping to spread each of their specific cons to possible marks. A typical group would consist of four teams of peddlers, each with a different mushroom they are focusing on. Either through a plant or an easily manipulable local, they will see that the marks are primed for the next group to come through by teasing some information about a different mushroom. In most cases, they are all selling the same thing with a different label, just changing the name to suit.

Credulous purchasers tend to tell everyone they know about how much good the elixir did, even if they do not think it did help. This is something that the con artists exploit - few* will admit to being taken in, instead insisting that the decision was a good one. This tendency also allows most to con their marks without fear of retribution, as a few locals claiming that the elixir worked is the surest form of protection.

Because of its origin in Sulae, the great Bardic College of Kolero became quite fascinated with the mushroom for a time, and many of their songs and tales have immortalized its powers. These songs continue to be sung, especially among traveling bards who can count on new audiences and thus don't work as hard on creating new tales or music. Many in smaller villages across the continent have never seen anyone with the mushrooms, but have heard one of the songs or stories about them. Some traveling performers are part of the con, and make sure they tell stories of the mushroom a few days before the peddler arrives.

In Literature

The Nebulfungo is the subject of many songs and stories, most coming from Sulae. A series of tales was written in the first half of the 9th century Af. revolving around a sailor from the Children who gained strength and wisdom from eating the mushrooms. More than a dozen authors contributed a story of the sailor, and they have been collected and printed many times over the years. These stories are incredibly popular in Sulae, and remembered fondly by anyone who grew up in that time.

The poet and playwright Jonquinn Halbar was known to eat the Nebulfungo regularly, and wrote the definitive work on the subject:

In farthest depths where ancient shadows play,

Deep gnomes and dwarves for power vie.

In caverns untouched by light of day

the Nebul thrives unseen by mortal eye.

From dark it springs, a mystic gift,

with spores that dance on tender breath,

Its touch a balm, strong and swift,

while conquering all pain and death.

O Wondrous Fungus, harbinger of ease,

In darkness where life is blind,

Your essence blooms in sorcery,

To mend the hurt and soothe the mind.

Through centuries may your magic reign

To free Sulae from doubt and pain.