Iris Churkoz

"Poem" to Kaylee

Kaylee   The stars seem dimmer down here. Their light fades with every step I take. And as I fall deeper down this pit I have created As I drift further away from that bright sky we sat beneath all those years ago A twisted thought suffocates me. Can I really see them, or is it all just a memory? An illusion of the sky that I still attempt to grasp on to. Nothing but memories. Memories of light. Of hope Of love.   But you taught me that the stars never die. No matter how far I stray from them they shall still be there Burning with the same passion they had when you first showed them to me. My steps in the sand have no power over the sky above us. And as such they shall always be there, waiting for my return into the light. So now, as I delve deeper Your voice kills those twisted thoughts And again I can breathe.   Even if it is just a memory, Those stars are still real for me and you. And wherever I lay my head I can still look up to them, Even if they are nothing but illusion, I can still be comforted by the memories of our light, Of our hope Of our love.

Letter 1

Kirael, I remember how when you were young you used to adore stories. Fantastic fables of worlds that were not our own. I refused to tell you them, and for that I am sorry. I could not picture a life better than the ones we were given. Though, that changed when Kaylee came into our lives and used to tell these stories of the Gods dancing through the night sky together, painting stories of their exploits into the stars. Of Bonbeauleza laying her heart into the earth so that all living things may beat with the same passion and harmony that she had within herself. Of beyond the walls, and what majesty may be one day waiting for us. It made me understand how these stories may bring hope, the seed that something more is waiting for us than this was planted in my head and I adored it. I still do. As such, I want to share some of my own stories with you, though I lack the incredible imagination Kaylee was gifted with so I will settle on tales of how much my life has changed since last we spoke. I won't speak of the tales of my last few years. I know you’re an adult woman now but in my head you are still the child I remember you as and as such those stories might be too upsetting for you. Instead I will tell you about my last few days and the strange people I met.   My daily routine is not much to speak of as it stands. I descend into the Gulch to kill beasts and sell what I can salvage to whoever will buy it. It is poor paying work but I assure you dear sister, it is more than enough to be happy. My fate changed however, when I was accosted on my return home by two thugs. Of course, I made short work of them. I’ve become more than a competent fighter since you last saw me. You’ll be happy to hear that I did not kill these men, though I did remove their weapons in hopes it would slow down their criminal exploits. I did also find a troubling note on their person which I shall tell you more of once I have more information on the subject, though knowing what I know now that note may have entangled me in a web much deeper than I had wished to involve myself with. In lighter news, I found a scrap of paper with a poorly drawn doodle stating ‘thank you sewer knight’ who I later met! It is joyous to know there are still those willing to help others out in the world.   I made a swift exit from the location of my previous fight, not wanting to have to entangle myself with the law by having to explain the two unconscious men I had left behind. But, as if I had fallen into the web of fate already, my swift exit led me to yet another confrontation. A set of beasts, far uglier than even our brother and with a far worse temper, had surrounded a group of innocents. I knew I had to step in to assist, even if I was greatly outnumbered. However, fate had decided to work in my favour this day as a set of truly strange people of vast power had also come to assist. I shall spare you the details of the fight as I feel no joy comes from tales of glory through bloodshed. Instead I will focus on these fantastic people as I am sure you will find them extremely fascinating. I shall start with Jenny, or the sewer knight as I am already sure he shall despise me for calling him. A strange person who refuses to remove their armour to show his face to us. However he proved himself as a formidable fighter in combat which has more than earned my trust from him. I am sure if we ventured into the gulch together you would never need to worry for my safety again. Next is Sam, a teenager with a distinctly unique tongue from Kinstead. He seemed to know little of the workings of Garrigill which I instantly perceived as dangerous for one so young. However, Sam seemed to be more than capable of holding his own in a fight, wielding magic that was an awe to behold. I am deeply curious of his abilities so shall write again of any incredible feats the young man performs while I have the pleasure of his company, though I do worry I insulted him by offering him to ride on my back. Apparently that is an insult to those taller than you, you must remember how difficult I find social interactions. I confess, the memories of having you on my shoulders came back to me and I wished to capture that magic again but I digress. Verrin will be more than pleased to hear I have acquainted myself with the church to some degree and have found two companions of faith. I shall describe them in ascending order of how much I like them, as to close my descriptions on a high. The first is a gentleman named Leopold. He had a grander title, but I must confess I did not take the time to memorise it. He must, though, hold a place of great importance which was made evident in the way he holds himself and the way he felt he could command me in battle despite us never meeting. It is my opinion that authority is earned with an individual, not given by a title. Let it be known that I only followed his orders because it was already the plan of attack I had already set out for myself, and not because he ordered me to. He is a strange man who changes his face at a moment’s notice which he admitted was for a good reason yet something still does not sit right with me. I do not think making company with one who you are uncertain if they are showing you their true face or not is unwise. I know that may sound hypocritical after my remarks of Jenny however, to speak improperly, Jenny is cool. Despite all this I wish not to understate the competence Leopold held both in and out of battle. The control he held over others is a power that no amount of training would help me achieve. Finally was Lacey, another person of faith. She was far more approachable than Leopold and held herself with a warmth and kindness that I have not seen much within The Veil. Not since Kaylee. Though, she does seem to have a naive disposition which apparently came from her years of faith. You will be happy to know I have met a woman who has spoken to people as little as I have. But there is something truly wonderful in seeing a woman of faith wield the power of heavens to protect those in need. I understand now why brother does what he does. Though Jenny is the person that I have met who I know I could potentially be friends with, Lacey is the one that I hope to be. But, I shall not get my hopes up right now as I have only just met these people and from my time in the Gulch I know that friendships can be short lived. I shall return to the story.   A man by the name of Barramead took control of the situation and informed us that there were more sightings of beasts like this across the city and that apparently they come from the outside. Though, knowing capable warriors like the ones I met exist I should not worry yourself too much with rumours like that. And know, if something were to happen I would do all in my power to protect you even if you do not believe it. Barramead told us to leave the sight of battle though told us to attend a form of meeting the following morning. I must admit that I made a fool of myself by trying to argue that I should be able to salvage parts of the beasts we slayed, money is hard to come by here. But before I made more of a fool of myself, a bell rang that signalled the return of the Crusaders. Sister, their return was truly a sight to behold. It was a joy to see the vast number that had come to witness their return, those that still hold hope for what waits for us beyond the walls. Though, I made eye contact with one that returned and his face was not one of joy, but again, I wish not to dwell on unhappy stories in this letter. Leopold is of high enough position within his faith that he had the pleasure of greeting and blessing those returning home and even brought Lacey to attend the rituals with him. I hope this is a sign of a good heart hidden behind the grandeur and formality.   Returning to our inn, we did sight the Crusader that I had made eye contact with and had the pleasure of sharing a drink with him. Though it was truly an honour, the festivities were short lived. He attempted to share some form of information with us but before he could a Custodian entered the inn and called him away. It is truly a rare sight to see a Custodian, but this my sister was not a pleasant encounter. They crashed upon the evening with a wave of foreboding that forced the night to come to a premature ending. Jenny left first as they had taken a task to protect one that apparently can see the future to some degree. The details were hazy through the excitement of the evening and I am not one to believe in predeterminism as it takes the excitement out of the unknown of our lives. But still, I could not help but think of how you would have loved to have met this person. We retired for the evening, with Lacey returning with me to assist with an errand that I shall tell you more of shortly. The true ending of this chapter of my story is not a happy one so I wish to end this with joyful news.   The morning came and we reported to the location we were instructed to meet. We were told of the incursion of monsters, platitudes were used on how only a small assault proves to us that the walls still provide protection. Kaylee’s stories of joy beyond the walls seem nothing but a coping mechanism to me now but I digress. We were told of an individual, The Sovereign, who had a part to play in these attacks and with this news it pains me to say that there may still be things here for me to do. Ways that I could use my abilities to protect those in need. Though, I know not who to trust here anymore. The Crusader, sister. They had executed him. To know they could take life with such a lack of remorse sickens me even now.   As promised, I shall end this letter with positive news. I have written to Kaylee. A poem that I have had stuck in my mind for some time now. I know not if it is of any artistic merit and I am sure you could tell me the countless ways I wielded our language like an inexperienced soldier holding a sword for the first time. However, Lacey seemed impressed, even if it were because she lacks experience hearing art of that kind. That was the task she assisted me with, writing the poem out for me. I know that may be a surprise. I have yet to tell you how I lost my arm. I have yet to tell you I lost my arm at all. For that, I am sorry. Perhaps, one day soon. I shall ask Lacey to help me write these letters to you too, but not yet. Not until my story has a happy ending. Until then I am deeply sorry, sister. With love, Iris.