Session 34: What a Waste Report

General Summary

Gathering at the docks, the group noticed hunters guarding the barge boarding ramp. The group opened the purse behind a quiet building, and shared out some items they had forgotton to spread around earlier. Roy cast a spell to grant a minor rewrite of events to Cigfran , Boris granted the Aid of The Source to his companions, and Cigfran scaled a building to get a better vantage point. What then followed was a confusing and long discussion of tactics combined with random comments often unrelated to the fight ahead. It became somewhat clear that few among these adventurers had any tactical experience beyond the typical highly chaotic "monster" fighting that was the expected life of an adventurer. Even the former soldier seemed unfamiliar with military tactics. Boris concidered what he might do to gain advantage against these constructs, but could not easily think of a good and effective option. Jeeves also gave a powerful magical herb, "Angel's Grace" to Goro so that the warrior would have a much greater chance to severely damage these constructed creatures. Roy also read a powerful magical script to enhance the range of his own magic.

Thus readied, Cigfran waved down, that others were approaching from behind. Roy teleported up to the roof, and Goro climbed up as well. Roisin Marshfield also climbed up to a slightly lower section of roof. The others gathered on a loading platform below. Cigfran opened the fight by launching a bolt at one of the hunters, damaging its armor. Cigfran tried to hide again. Roisin Marshfield ordered Cigfran to attack, and he tried to strike the hunter, but he had not hidden well, and missed. Goro applied magical gel to his arrows, then struck the construct twice. Roy dodged, and Jeeves accidentally struck Goro in the back with a misplaced arrow. The hunters charged forward, teleporting twice as far as they ran at the end of their charge. A familiar figure, the same Unknown Wizard the party had fought several times before, stepped out of a small boat nearby, and launched a powerful magic, a bolt of lightning that struck Goro and then continued on to strike Boris, Roisin Marshfield, and Jeeves . All at least partly dodged the bolt, Roisin Marshfield's scarf enabling her to avoid the impact entirely. Boris called forth a lightning storm, and struck two of the constructs with a bolt called down from the clouds. Cigfran then hid behind the edge of the roof, fired a bolt at the Unknown Wizard, and struck, dealing substantial harm, but noticed that the wizard's hardened skin reduced that considerably. Roisin Marshfield ordered Goro to attack, and Goro fired at the wizard, who deflected it with a magical shield. Jeeves , coordinated, also fired, but missed. Roy then heard the voice of the Master directing him to leave the wizard alone, but resisted the command. Roy used the power of his magic ring to empower a spell, scorching ray, and launched 5 bolts of fire at the Unknown Wizard. only two hit, causing some mild damage, then consumed a powerful alchemical preparation to grant him several portents of the future, and declared that the Unknown Wizard would not escape their wrath again. Goro consumed a healing herb and took that moment to also catch his breath, then threw an origami fist in the air, summoning a paper fist to grasp one of the constructs, which succeeded, restraining the creature. Jeeves then fired his shortbow at the restrained creature, striking twice gouging the metal. The remaining hunters continued to rush forward. The wizard swirled a cape dramatically, disappeared in a puff of smoke, and reappeared next to Roisin Marshfield, then conjured a massive cone of magical cold which impacted Boris, Roisin Marshfield, and Roy . Roisin Marshfield's halfling luck prevented much of the damage. Roy 's portent warned him of the event and he dodged much of the impact, while Boris gritted his teeth and resisted the cold. Roisin Marshfield's antics forced the wizard to take a hit from his own spell, but he survived and then vomited forth Lightning right in Roisin Marshfield's face, which her scarf partially deflected. The lightning also blasted a hole in the roof which Roisin Marshfield nimbly avoided. The wizard also tossed another scrap of paper in the air. Boris then healed everyone with a divine word of health, and was promptly engulfed in infernal flames. Boris also called another bolt of lightning to strike one of the constructs. Cigfran hid, and prepared to fire at the wizard, Roy had forseen this, and directed Cigfran to a weak point, resulting in a powerful critical strike. Cigfran also called upon a celestial boon and very nearly killed the Unknown Wizard in one strike, but the wizard survived, and, with a screamed curse, disappeared. Cigfran cursed, and Roisin Marshfield cried out encouragement to rally both Roy and Boris. Roy hopped down to a lower level of the roof, stood back up, and fired a fusillade of scorching rays at the construct restrained in the paper hand, but missed with every one. The construct restrained in the hand spent its turn escaping the magical hand, first blasting it with thunder, then bullying itself out of the hand's grasp. Goro then tried to re-grab the construct, but the creature was far too strong. Goro fired his longbow at the same creature, and gouged the metal slightly. Jeeves looked around, still a bit shell-shocked, ran back closer to Boris, then fired his bow at the closest hunter, but missed twice. One of the hunters charged forward, appearing next to Roisin Marshfield. Another also charged forward, and also appeared next to Roisin Marshfield, opposite the first. Boris healed Roisin Marshfield with a divine word of health, then fired a clockwork bolt at the construct out on the road, but missed. Cigfran took careful aim, and fired at one of the constructs next to Roisin Marshfield, striking solidly. Roisin Marshfield then ordered Cigfran to attack again, Cigfran struck powerfully, right in a critical mechanism. The creature exploded, and Roisin Marshfield dodged out of the way of the blast, which left a hole in the roof. Roisin Marshfield then drank a Ditan's Displacement, trading places with Goro, who was shocked to find himself next to a very angry construct. Goro reacted by slicing the creature's armor, and its eyes glowed bright red as it turned toward Goro in fury. Roy used his magic ring to fire an Ice Lance at the creature next to Goro, blasting a hole in its armor and leaving it briefly stunned thanks to Roy 's portent forseeing this event. The other hunter charged forward, and appeared next to Roisin Marshfield. Goro directed the hand to grasp the hunter again, but it knocked the hand aside. Goro then drank a disgusting potion, causing him to vomit forth ice and cold, blasting the hunter further. The creature turned toward Goro "Don't worry, you aren't the target, stop hurting me and I won't kill you". Jeeves saw that Roisin Marshfield was next to a Hunter, and rushed over to offer his physician's skill and healing, fully restoring her strength. Jeeves then backed away, and the hunter slammed him with thunder, which he was unable to sidestep. Roy thought he had forseen this event, but was mistaken. The hunter tried to leave Goro behind, and when Goro took the opportunity to slash at it, it turned and stabbed him in the gut with a sword covered in sparks, but Roy had forseen this event and the creature missed, it still charged over to Roisin Marshfield, appearing opposite the other Hunter, bracketing Roisin Marshfield again. Boris rushed over, conjured a spiritual weapon, and a glitch in the matrix caused a brief freeze in reality. The weapon missed, and Boris then fired a clockwork bolt, which missed as well. Cigfran again took careful aim and fired his crossbow and the weaker of the two hunters, just managing to penetrate its armor. The strike jammed a crucial component, leaving the creature unstable. Roisin Marshfield ordered Boris to fire another cockwork bolt, which missed, and coordinated Jeeves to fire as well, but he also missed. Roy teleported to the ground, rushed closer, and attempted to encase the stronger hunter in momentary stasis. The Hunter resisted, thanks to its innate resistance to magical effects. The hunter reached out with its sparking longsword, connecting to a port on the other hunter, and a magical field began to form. Goro moved up, called out a warning, focused on his warrior's fighting spirit, and fired his longbow at the weaker of the two. After striking twice, he surged with activity and fired twice more, striking twice more. The last struck a critical point and the Hunter exploded. This triggered a chain reaction into the other Hunter, which also exploded. Roisin Marshfield, thanks to her magic scarf, managed to avoid the first explosion and mostly avoided the second. Silence fell over the battlefield. There were a number of spectators watching from a considerable distance, including some watching in awe at the stormcloud dropping lightning on the dock.

The group approached the barge, the captain, a halfling female, met them on the deck, and asked if the group might be willing to assist the boat if they encountered any threats to the boat, to which Roisin Marshfield agreed. The captain noted that the Duke would be rather put out at the loss of the Hunters, and Boris mentioned he was put out about the captain informing on them, which the captain denied. Goro agreed and said that the Harbormaster informed, but the Captain explained it was the travel broker, who was merely trying to protect his own family. The Captain also explained that the official story was that Roisin Marshfield had fallen under evil influence, and was being controlled by her companions. The Captain explained that she knew a lie when she heard one, and Roy noticed that the Captain appeared quite elderly; something that, for a Halfling, meant she was very close to the end of her life. The group came aboard, and overheard the Captain reassuring passengers that the recent events were just a demonstration of the ability of the boat crew to defend the boat against strange creatures they might encounter as they passed the Sudarnen Badlands. At dinner that evening, the Captain spoke to Roy about magic that might help the barge, and they discussed a couple options to enhance their travel.

Over the next few days, Boris and Jeeves conspired to keep Goro sober and unable to become drunk, as well as sparkling clean at all times. This caused growing frustration, to the point that Goro was threatening to burn the boat, one of the senior crew brought Goro to the side of the boat, and directed him to a creature swiming about nearby. Goro helped them kill a massive, 8-meter long fish of about 5-6 tons. When they hauled it aboard they told Goro he was welcome to come kill these large fish anytime he might wish to. They also explained that the fish were poison. The mouthparts of the creature were very similar to those of a leech, and they latched on to the barge, slowing it and damaging the ship. The crew fought a constant effort to keep them off the barge, and Goro's help to kill the beasts would be most appreciated. They asked if Goro would like to cut it to bits, and Goro just tore into it with his sword, including carving Jeeves ' face into the flesh before cutting through the creature. The remains were used to chum the waters, and a dozen more of the creatures attacked the meat offered. It turned out the poison in the creatures was just as dangerous for their own kind as to humanoids, but the creatures could not resist eating the toxic chum. Goro spent a bit of each day in this violent form of therapy, which calmed his demeanor quite effectively. This continued for the first week, until they approached the edge of the Sudarnen Badlands.

Notes

As an interesting side note, the GM consistently misjudged their own homebrew magic item, constantly surprised at the actual characteristics of the Paper Hand, despite having designed it themselves. Even the best GM's sometimes get it wrong in the most ironic way.

Also, when the GM mentioned, in response to talk of a Halfling throwing contest, that throwing Roisin would be like throwing a 20 Kg kettle bell, Goro's player ran out, grabbed a 15Kg kettle bell, rushed outside in the cold, and threw the kettle bell as far as he could, which turned out not even a small fraction of the 30 meters intended (about 3 meters). This was at approximately midnight local time.