Golden Slumber Fills Your Eyes

The soft snores and deep breathing of her companions did nothing to lull Kick to sleep as she clutched at her Mother’s great axe while hidden away in her bedroll. The axe hadn’t changed but somehow after feeling the rush of hatred and power the cursed weapon had given her; this unenchanted axe felt both more study and weaker just that morning. The silent tears that spilled passed the sides of her any along her cheeks didn’t stop, even though she willed them to. It was obvious that her tears bothered her party, and even with their easy acceptance of her apologies it did nothing to calm her. Normally her sister would be screaming at her for giving up such a powerful weapon just as she was getting in touch with her barbarian troupe’s ways; but the guilt she felt somehow kept her sister’s spirit and voice away.
 
 
 
She knew that the ability to sleep would not come easily that night. Perhaps the best thing she could do is leave the party that night. If she couldn’t rage in fear of hurting her companions and could only cry at cutting down their enemies, what use would she be to her or her herd?
 
 
 
A butterfly, so strange to see during the day and even stranger at night, fluttered to her axe and rested there. Kick watched it, wings glowing florescent in low light of the campfire. She watched it just for a moment, but that moment stopped her tears. When she turned her head to look away the butterfly lifted and begin to fly away. Weaving slowly at first, enough to get back into line of sight, before lifting up and flying away again.
 
 
 
She bit her lip and slowly crawled out of her bedroll. Kick got to her feet and looked towards each member sadly. Sleepy tiny Monkey, the first full halfling she ever got to be friendly with and fight along side of. The memory of the dragon they attacked together flashed in her mind and she smiled. Maybe her dad was as tiny and brave as he.
 
 
 
Looking towards Caryn Kick’s smile grew proud. She was a wizard of few words but many fireballs. Somehow that unsure nature fed into her magical ability instead of taking away from it. That was ability Kick could only dream of having.
 
 
 
Finally, she looked at Night, and the lump in her throat grew to choke her. She remembered every coin of gold, every bit of healing and every small way their leader had strengthened her. They had been adventurers together, and even despite Kick’s attack on her she hadn’t tried to get revenge like her mother or sister would. Night just patted her shoulder and went back to looting as if she had known all along Kick wasn’t at fault.
 
 
 
She could feel Leosin glancing at her while he took his watch over the party members. Before he could say anything, Kick mumbled about having the call of nature and took off. In her dust she left all of her goods behind, including her mother’s oldest weapon. It wasn’t much, but she hoped they could put it to good use.
 
As she ran from them the cool night wind dried her face. The need to be strong to rejoin her tribe and to get over her weakness had been her overwhelming goal. Now that she had a taste of that; the taste was surprisingly bitter and ashy in her mouth. Beating a fellow. Being the strongest in the group didn’t make her feel better.
 
 
 
You can’t run from me…
 
 
 
“Yes I can.” Kick spoke between harsh breaths.
 
 
 
There was no joy in being strong after the rush of bloodlust and adrenaline was going. Her bare feet caught the dirt and rocks as she increased her pace. Kick was exhausted but the fact that her goal wasn’t what she wanted made her push through that.
 
 
 
This is the sort of dominance our family has. Go and get back that axe. Learn to wield it. Come for me and mother. Show us how strong you because.
 
 
 
Her blood began to rush and she let her body twist and jump from rock to tree. She swung on branches. She rolled and bounced back to her feet. The breeze felt like it was spurring her own as she ran to her realization. Her sister sounded quieter somehow. Not as strong and willful like she use to.
 
 
 
“I didn’t like that power.” Kick’s sweat dripped from her forehead as she responded to the darkness. Instead of growing weaker, she felt her chest swell just a little with assurance. “I won’t fight those I’m closest to just to gain it.”
 
 
 
The moon’s light reflected on her sweat and gave her a glow that almost felt like sunshine. She leapt over a fallen log and caught her foot on an especially large mushroom. She tumbled off balance and fell back first into a small pond. Or an overly large sludge puddle.
 
 
 
Stupid girl…
 
 
 
“Probably…” Kick laughed, looking up at the sky while lying in the mud. It was a tired sort of laugh, mixed with a kind of self-assuredness and peace she hadn’t felt before. That run had taken any last bit of strength she had stored. Or maybe it was contradicting her sister for the first time and truly meaning it.
 
 
 
The ripple of water flowed around her, rippling her clothes and hair around her. She squelched her fingers into the mud as if holding a warm blanket. It was surprisingly nice, and Kick finally felt a strange source of peace as water lilies, frogs, owls and other night sounds came to drown out her doubting mind.
 
 
 
Probably not.
 
 
 
“Thank you, Mr. Mud.” Kick yawned, exhausted. Her eyes fluttered closed, unsure of where the voice came from and too tired to care. “But now what?”
 
 
 
Just sleep my child. Return to your friends tomorrow and I will talk to you again.