Fire and Lightning

Fuck yeah!
Fuck!
Yeah!
 
Wooooooooooo!
 
The folks back home are not going to believe this one. I killed a gods damned dragon! This is the sort of tale that the older timers would prattle on about at the bar just to swindle a free pint out of you; but I've actually done it!
 
---
 
The scaly bugger tried to get the jump on us as we woke from our rest- thank Tymora for spellcasters. Without the quick thinking of Leront and his magic fingers, I doubt we would have given the bastard as thorough of a walloping as we did. A corridor full of web was all we needed to turn the tables on the beast; setting off down the corridor, we, in turn, prepared our own ambush.
 
Oh, Betty. How she did glow. As he stuck his ugly maw around the corner, I lit him up with the light of a thousand suns.
 
Zlap. Zlap! Zlaplap! Zlapzlapzlapzlap!
 
Beam after beam of radiant fire shot forth from Betty's magnificent muzzle. (I lost count after the twentieth).
 
The dragon barely had time to let loose a bolt of lightning. Its death rattle hitting me square in the chest.
 
But I wasn't going to let a bit of static electricity slow me down. Betty seared through the beast's wing with a final burst from deep within her chamber. The dragon was dead before it hit the ground.
 
---
 
Well that is how I remember it at least.
 
The old man never so much as scared off a troll in his prime; but look at me now, dad. I'm about to raid a dragon's hoard. I am about to be quite well off without selling historical relics on the black market.
 
(Maybe I can get Greta and Hugo to finally paint that portrait of me. They'll probably do it if I bring them back something nice.)