Kezpudin

God of Construction, Function, and Efficiency

Pronunciation - /KEZ-puh-din/
Kezpudin hates literally everyone and everything as he's in a constant state of dissatisfaction and annoyance. The only few people he tolerates is Shiwa, who even he views as extremely inefficient as she does everything at the last minute. Kezpudin values time and efficiency above all else and views any action taken against those things as not just incredibly bothersome but pitiful. He looks down on those who are inefficient as lesser, as even relaxation times should be scheduled and optimized to maximize destressing.
There are very few times Kezpudin can not be found hard at work, but during those moments he's usually in his Felis form drinking milk and getting massages from the machines he's built for himself. He refuses to indulge in relaxation with other Gods though as he is overall a very solitary and reclusive individual. If he's looking on the Material Realm, he's constantly judging and critiquing the works of those who reside there, even his followers, so he actively attempts avoiding it despite his best efforts and delegates his angels to solve the problems for him.
One of his biggest faults is that he is very prideful of his work ethic to the point of having an inflated ego. Followers are expected to be the most efficient as possible, sacrificing art and beauty for the sake of function. In addition, devout worshipers are acutely aware of Kezpudin's disdain for other individuals as the God would rather off himself than humor giving divine guidance himself. Delegation and efficiency go hand in hand, as no one has really seen him since the one time he's been on the material to his own church to prove his existence, dreading his whole time there, before quickly retreating to get back to work.

Divine Domains

Clerics of Kezpudin only have access to the Forge domain when choosing their path.

Divine Symbols & Sigils

The holy symbol of Kezpudin is a hammer with a cat's eye either carved in or embedded as a gem.

Tenets of Faith

• Build to the highest standards
• Get the specifications. If you don't know why you're building you don't know when you're right.
• Give accurate estimates
• If someone else can do something better, it's their job to do that part.

Physical Description

Facial Features

• Perpetual frown
• Piercing and evaluating glare

Physical quirks

• His nostrils tend to flare when he looks at someone for too long.
• He often appraises things with his arms crossed, and his fingers tap in a random order

Apparel & Accessories

• Always with a tool belt

Mental characteristics

Personal history

Kezpudin is a third-generation god created in order to oversee the palaces and other fantastic structures of the gods' holy realms. However, they quickly learned that while he was the god of construction, it wasn't to the sort of standard that many of them were expecting. Meandering paths, ornate spires... none of that was in the construction plans for Kezpudin's work. Many gods soon realized that they would have to do the work themselves if they wanted such useless fancy things as stained glass in the windows. As a result, Kezpudin was quickly put out of work for his most important purpose. Only Shiwa, who was too lazy to do the work herself, let Kezpudin complete his job and construct her a library where everything was easy to find and there was exactly enough room for everything she needed. She immediately ruined it by organizing nothing and leaving everything wherever she felt like it. Since that time, Kezpudin has withdrawn from both the mortal and divine world, preferring to do things properly where no one is going to change up the requirements to stupid things while he's working.

Gender Identity

• Gender is a construct, and thus should be used for whatever purpose is most efficient.

Sexuality

• Aromantic Demisexual
• Love is wishy-washy, useless, and long-winded
• Sex is useful very occasionally, but only people who aren't going to prove to be insufferable idiots deserve consideration.

Employment

Unemployed, and now is on that grind non-stop to provide meaning to his life.

Accomplishments & Achievements

• Built The Oracle's Archive for Shiwa
• Constructed angels himself, rather than relying on Oum to do it.
• Has one of the most efficiently run religions in Argent, despite his almost zero involvement with the organization.

Failures & Embarrassments

• Laid off from the job that was his entire purpose for being created
• In the antechamber from the front door of his palace into the rest of the building, There is a set of doors of which one is ever so slightly crooked and mishappen. He knows this, but refuses to acknowledge it. It is the only thing imperfect about his entire castle, but he refuses to let anyone know this.
• Once, Akari thought he was a very cute little cat and picked him up, and so help him he purred with satisfaction. He considers himself a very respectable god and has sworn Akari to a very poorly-kept secrecy.

Mental Trauma

• Other gods often patronize him for the efficiency of his designs over the form. They very rarely acknowledge that this trait is anything more than an adorable failing on his part, rather than the divinely considered design it always is.
• Someone once pointed out that cats are some of the most inefficient and purposeless beings, and it occasionally causes him existential dread.

Intellectual Characteristics

• Sees most other beings as uselessly inefficient, which he relates directly to a measure of intelligence. He very much dislikes being around dumb people.
• Can not stop critiquing the design of objects. Often disagrees on the purpose of artistic forms like sculpture, or the design of life forms like various types of tree. (He hates the design of conifers most of all, the spikes aren't even useful, and they're all sappy).

Morality & Philosophy

• Anything you build should be as functionally perfect as you are capable of making. Any mistakes reflect directly on your capability and intelligence, and should be compared as such.
• Morality goes only as far as the designer's control vs the user's. Making a weapon requires the wielder to choose to hurt people, making siege weaponry requires someone to pull the lever. It is not evil of the designer that the weapon is efficient.

Taboos

• Never malign a creation unless you can prove you've done better.

Personality Characteristics

Likes & Dislikes

• Milk
• Massages
• To be left alone

• Peanut gallery comments
• Dumb questions
• Pathetic attempts to impress him

Hygiene

Immaculate. Clean is efficient, and every engineer needs a clean workshop.

Divine Classification

Lesser Deity

Alignment

Lawful Neutral

Species

Felis

Realm

Argent

Circumstances of Birth

Created by Oum to solve the problem of divine holy realms.

Gender

Kezpudin takes a masculine form as it is the most efficient body for work, because a majority of female forms require them to be inefficient once a month for an inconstant number of days.

Eyes

Pale Bronze, Cat Eyes

Quotes & Catchphrases

"Ugh... So Slow..." "Start from scratch"