Thanks Alexei

Life, Identity

Fenneck arrives back from Flottenheim for the new year. He and Natalya catch up about how their relative winters went.

Natalya was reading in the cave. She was trying to distract herself from the fact that Fenneck wasn't back from Flottenheim yet. He was cutting it close. Dimitri would have the next refugees in a couple of days. She had been checking the path to Flottenheim pretty frequently hoping to see his familiar shiny white hair and silky blue tunic on his way into the mountains but she hadn't yet. It was late now, the sun had set hours ago and she changed into a smock and curled up under the furs to get some rest. As she laid her head down she heard what she hoped were Fenneck's foot steps out side of the cave. She instinctively grabbed her bedside dagger. She sighed a sigh of relief when he walked in, covered in snow. "You're cutting it close." She said as he entered. He shook the snow off of himself and smiled at her sarcastically, "Hello! Good to see you too! How was you're winter? I hope you had a lovely time." She rolled her eyes at him, "It was fine." She said scornfully, "How was yours?" He smiled as he took off his cloak and hung it near the entrance. "Wonderful, actually." Natalya was annoyed that he actually seemed to mean that. "What was so wonderful about it?" She asked, picking up her book to look at its pages and tried to ignore the fact that she was indeed happy to see him. "Well, the Winter's Eve festival was lovely. I spent a lot of time with Naertho and Jasna. She says hi by the way and asks that you come visit her soon. Now that we aren't together she says she deserves a shot with you." Fenneck joked. Natalya smiled sadly and felt guilty about not visiting Jasna these last few years. Fenneck continued, "I told her to come up into the mountains herself to come see you but she chickened out. Then I...I caught up with an old friend." Natalya noticed him smile and his demeanor get soft with the memory of it. He finished, "And that was mostly it." He turned and smiled at Natalya, "How about you? Did you see Dimitri?" She tried not to look at him, "Yeah, we met a couple times." "How is he?" Fenneck asked as he changed into some more comfortable clothes for the evening. Natalya forced herself not to look at his muscular back as he took his tunic off but caught herself catch a couple of glimpses. She enjoyed seeing his smooth, shoulders. They were quite muscular from his expertise with a bow. "He's okay. You know, as okay as you can be living in hell." She said coldly. Fenneck didn't put a shirt on as he went to the fire and checked the stew pot. "Sorry, I wasn't expecting you." She said, seeing his disappointment at the empty pot. "That's fine." He said as he plucked an apple from the roof. He sat down next to the fire to warm himself and he started cutting into it with his dagger. He always did that and Natalya hated it. He never just bit into fruit. He always had to cut it up first. Natalya hated it mostly because a part of herself found his tick charming. Sometimes she would eat an apple and bite into it just to see his passive annoyance at it. She was also annoyed that he hadn't put a shirt on. That wasn't a common habit with him and Natalya hoped he wasn't getting that comfortable around her. "So did you fuck in the snow again?" He asked, looking down at his apple. She found his directness odd and out of character, maybe this was Jasna trying to play a trick on her, shapeshifting as Fenneck. "Wouldn't you like to know." She said passively as she turned a page in her book. Pretending to read. "I had sex." He blurted out. He was a little flushed as he looked up at her to see her reaction. She paused and turned to him giving him a stare. He looked nervous and kind of ridiculous as he slowly started turning pink. She started laughing at his ridiculous behavior. "Nice try. I don't buy it." She laughed. "I did." He said, offended that she didn't believe him. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have just blurted that out, but I did. I just...I just thought you should know." She noticed he seemed upset. "We aren't a thing." She said to him, "Fuck whoever you want." She turned back to her book begging herself not to ask him who it was with. Her curiosity got the better of her though. "Who...who was it? Some courtesan friend of Jasna's?" He looked offended at her implication that he would have to hire someone to have sex with him. "No. He was an old friend. We hadn't seen each other in a while." Natalya's heart skipped a beat. He. She had known Fenneck was bi but she never really thought much about it. She thought he'd only ever been with Evelyn. She could tell Fenneck wanted her to ask about it and unfortunately Natalya wanted to know. "What's his name?" She asked. Fenneck smiled nervously, "Alexei. We grew up together. He's a wood-elf." Natalya sat her book down, giving up on holding her grudge against Fenneck for his lateness. He seemed happy talking about Alexei and it made Natalya happy to see him like that. "He's a bar tender in Flottenheim." "Is he as pretty as I am?" Natalya joked. Fenneck smiled at her curiosity and banter. "He's very handsome." He said, avoiding offending anyone. Natalya liked how cute and excited he was to tell her this. "He has black hair and darker features. He's very..." Fenneck was blushing and absentmindedly messing with the fur he was sitting on. Natalya stood, still wrapped in her fur so that Fenneck couldn't see she was just wearing a smock and she went and sat across from him on the other side of the fire. "Is this weird? Talking about this sort of thing?" He asked. "You ask me about Dimitri all the time." She said, enjoying the idea that their friendship might actually be at this point. Fenneck sighed, "I feel bad. I just...It had been so long and I just..." He paused and thought for a moment, "I just wanted to do something a little crazy. I thought it would be weird because of...well...this." He motioned to himself and Natalya. "But...it wasn't. I think I've been a bit hard on myself about this sort of thing for a while." He seemed very thoughtful. "Maybe at first I wanted to do it because I have been a bit hurt by you and Dimitri. The fact that you two have each other." He paused for a moment. "It's weird...even when I was with Alexei I...I didn't feel like I was...betraying you?" He struggles to explain his thoughts. Natalya understood what her meant. She felt that way with Dimitri. Even laying romantically in Dimitri's arms with him inside her she felt Fenneck's presence. It did take some getting used to but eventually Natalya decided to just embrace it. It tended to make the moment more intimate in a way. She didn't dare tell Dimitri this though. "I know what you mean. The whole...not missing each other thing. Like we're always together." He nodded, "I thought it would make it...difficult...to have sex with someone else that is." He paused, "Is it weird that I enjoyed it?" He looked up at her nervously, "Feeling...your presence?" Natalya felt herself blush, she rested her chin on her knees and avoided Fenneck's eyes, "I feel that way...when I'm with Dimitri. I don't tell him that though. I think it would upset him." Fenneck looked relieved. "I'm glad it's not just me then." Natalya thought for a moment. "Before, back when theramin was more common...Did people who share that connection sleep with other people?" Fenneck shrugged, "I have no idea. I don't think my parents ever did." Natalya thought about this for a moment before asking, "So other than that, I mean, a hundred years is a long time. Was it as good as you remember? Sex, I mean." Fenneck thought for a moment and smiled, "Yeah, I think so. It was refreshing. I feel like I can relax a bit now. I feel like my prudishness was a bit of a hindrance these last few years." "That's the biggest understatement of the era." Natalya smiled at him. Fenneck smiled back, "You're probably right. It was nice, to open myself up again. It's been a long time since I've allowed myself to do that." Natalya felt guilt rise up in her at these words. "Besides you of course. But I think with you I forced myself to open up too much." Fenneck assured her, "I think I'm starting to learn there's a balance to be struck." He said thoughtfully. Natalya was happy to see Fenneck like this. He did seem to be a bit softer around the edges. Less uptight. Natalya considered sending Alexei a gift bag to thank him. They chatted for a little while about Flottenheim and other stories and things Fenneck had to share with Natalya before they decided to get some rest. Natalya enjoyed Fenneck's presence in the cave and had a good nights rest for the first time in weeks.