Session Report: 18 December 2020

A Very Merry Tsuwamono Christmas

General Summary

In this session of Tsuwamono, the following events transpired:

Shingeki no Santazaemon

1559年12月25日

Hokkaido

Historical Entry: Shingeki no Santazaemon

Against the looming threat of the Unstoppable Holiday Force, Yukijirushi Santazaemon, the brave Cardinal Generals of the Hashinara Clan gathered up their presents and hopped on the Holiday Express heading north. Perhaps in the snowy fields of Hokkaido they could find some peace. But it was not to be. That monstrous champion of Oyamatsumi, Santazaemon, caught up with the speeding train and violently inserted himself into the last car. It was up to the Cardinal Generals and what allies they had been able to gather on such short notice to hold the monster off. If they could just survive until the Christmas Tree at the front of the train gathered enough Holiday Cheer...
It was the last hope they had for a jolly Christmas.
The rearmost train car held an assortment of less-powerful generals. Despite their overall unpreparedness for such a feat, brave Abura Akago, Tarō, and Saburō Shōhei steeled themselves to halt Santazaemon's rampage. Their titanic foe, however, did not hold the same intentions. He muscled through the crowd of tiny generals, making his way to the end of the car and preparing to jump over to the next in line. On his passing, Abura Akago lashed out with her viscous body. Not only did she somehow trap up Santazaemon in her oil, but the lingering molten flames that ran through her form seemed to irritate his skin greatly. Santazaemon turned to face the two generals behind him. His ire had been roused. And yet, weren't there three generals in that car? Indeed, our shinobi hero, Saburō Shōhei, had taken advantage of the distraction to scurry below the train seats. Perhaps he was too small, or perhaps Santazaemon did not see a toy-sized dog as a threat. All true followers of Tsuwamono will know, however, that the real reason was that Shōhei's shinobi skills allowed him to meld with the shadows and dampen his presence more effectively than even the ninja of legend. Regardless, Santazaemon did not notice the pup at all as he stole under the seats and to the gap separating this car from the next. With a noble cause swelling in his heart and dedication in his soulful eyes, Shōhei's jaws clamped around the pin holding both sections together. With an unseen flourish, he pulled it out. The two cars began to separate slowly as this rearmost vessel lost speed. Few noticed yet, for Santazaemon's attention was focused entirely on the target of his rage, but Shōhei had accomplished yet another mission with flair.
Meanwhile, Tarō managed to complete his ritual, invoking a shikigami to transform into "Tamamo-no-Tarō," infused with Tamamo-no-Mae's power. Mystical lightning crackled out from the newly-minted Kitsune, yet grounded itself in Santazaemon's beard harmlessly. Abura Akago, too, even with her elemental advantage, could do little more than singe the monster before her. With deadly intensity, Santazaemon raised his Ō Christmas Tree above his head and swung down. The Akago splattered, losing her form entirely as that dread club wiped her consciousness away in a single drop.
The other two generals could only watch in horror. Now free, Santazaemon turned to resume his journey, only to note with rising fury that the next car was growing more distant by the second. It was all that Tarō could do to interpose before the giant made his next leap. Trusting his instincts, Shōhei understood that there was little his jaws or blades could do against a foe. Instead, he turned to face the widening gap and jumped! The rail pin dropped from his mouth as Shōhei seemed to hang in the air for a moment. It was clear he wouldn't make it. Yet, in that instant when his big soulful eyes passed the window to the next car, Shōhei managed to communicate a message. Tsukuda Katsuo, within the meal car, understood what must be done without a single word being exchanged.
Shōhei dropped then, tragedy rushing to the fore as it seemed he would end up mangled by the rushing tracks below. At the last moment, a light! A hatch at the top of the rearmost car had opened and a dashing young man dropped down from above. His immaculate, white-gloved hand caught Shōhei by the scruff of his ninja neck, saving the brave pooch from certain doom. Kobayakawa "Prince Frederick Charles of Prussia" Hideaki brushed himself down. It was the kind of entrance most gentlemen can only dream of.
All this was possible because Tarō still stood defiantly in the great Santazaemon's path. With magical shield raised, that psuedokitsune braced for impact, seeking to hold back the advancing monster for only a moment longer... And indeed that impact came. The Yukijirushi Ō Christmas Tree arced down with the deadly intent of an executioner's axe. Under its great weight, Tarō's magic shield shattered like a glass bauble. There was little left of the poor creature when Santazaemon stepped forward again. Nothing was left now to stop him from crossing, yet in that interim, the gap between cars had widened to a good twenty feet.
Despite Saburō Shōhei's valiant efforts, this obstacle offered little difficulty to Santazaemon. Bunching his tree-trunk legs, he leapt with divine accuracy, bursting through the door to the meal car without any apparent exertion of effort. Inside, Elyan, Sugihara Hidemitsu, and Tanefuji Shinryū all scrambled to ready themselves for their role in this chaotic theater. Katsuo, forewarned by Shōhei's soulful gaze, had already been at work. Even as Santazaemon's furred boots touched down in the meal car, Katsuo shattered the pin holding it to the next car. Just as before, their section slowed and began to pull away from the main train and their remaining hope.
Back on the rearmost car, Prince Frederick Charles looked upon the widening gap with growing gentlemanly apprehension. He was an athletic young man. Surely he could make such a leap. First, however, Charles showed remarkable presence of mind by tossing Shōhei into the next car. His aim was true and the pup plopped right into Elyan's surprised arms. Backing away then, Charles secured a running start and then leaped into the air between the two carriages. Although his jump was better than Shōhei's first had been, the cars were further away now, and it was equally clear that Prince Frederick was not going to make it. Unlike Shōhei, no great white-gloved hand reached down to pick the unlucky prince from the air. His handsome, smiling face passed in front of the meal car's rear window for a moment, then his boots snagged on the racing railway below and he was pulled violently down, out of sight and away.
Chaos reigned in the meal car and few saw Prince Frederick's final moments under the imminent threat of Santazaemon. Elyan set his entrusted pup down on the table and made for the next car to warn the heroes who waited there. Hidemitsu gathered his power and Katsuo set about returning to the fray, but it was Tanefuji Shinryu who took on the solemn task of facing Santazaemon. He challenged the giant to a duel. A samurai's showdown. If there was even a shred of honor left in Santazaemon's madness-ravaged soul, he would have to accept such a noble challenge. Indeed, that Yuletide Titan growled his first words since arriving on the Express: an acceptance. Tanefuji would have his duel. Cunning as always, however, the young samurai hero amended his previous challenge. They would not battle with blades and brawn, but in a contest to see who could eat the most. It seemed Saburō Shōhei had already begun in a challenge of his own. The pup had already eaten half of a whole turkey on the feast-laden table. Opting for the next best option, Shinryu grabbed a heaping bowl of mashed potatoes and began shoveling them into his mouth.
The other generals in the car stood by in awe, their own honor preventing them from interfering in such a direct contest of wills. None were prepared for what Santazaemon did next. Placing one immense hand on each side of the long table, the merry monster lifted it up at a sharp angle and let every remaining dish slide at once into his inhumanly-stretched mouth. At the same moment, Shōhei realized his immediate peril. His paws scrabbled on the wood fruitlessly as the small ninja slid with a terrible inevitability toward that pitch-dark maw. As his tiny feet were about to pass Santazaemon's lips, the nearest window shattered to welcome a new messenger. Swinging in on a rope, Ryuhaku scooped Shōhei out of his doomed slide and landed with a swashbuckler's panache on the other side of the table.
Once again, the dog was saved. However, there was no doubt that Santazaemon had won that contest. He crunched forward, turning the table into kindling in his wake, and declared that Shinryu would now endure his "penalty game."
By this point, Elyan had crossed the increasing gap to the next car and alerted the Cardinal Generals to the crisis at hand. Aotsuki Tsukamoto, Fubuki, Hashinara Yoshitakatomo, Maxim, Ryūzaki Sanosuke, and their various sheele readied themselves for an impending challenge. Aotsuki and Maxim took to the front of the car, preparing to stymie Santazaemon's inevitable attempt to jump over. Sanosuke, meanwhile, hopped the gap himself to join in the fray. Elyan moved further up the train to the Christmas Tree itself while Yoshitaktomo called upon a power she* had secured in a similar trial, fusing her* being with that of the powerful Jabberwock and becoming Dragon Queen Alice once again.
It seemed that the Christmas Tree was gathering more power as they participated in traditionally cheerful holiday activities. Shōhei's feast and the eating contest in the meal car, for example, had caused it to flare up with power. Hoping to push this process along, Aotsuki called upon his sheele, Kagami, to conjure an array of light-element orbs which she then placed at the top of each tree in the meal car. The festive glow given off by these makeshift ornaments indeed seemed to hasten their accumulation of power. Even so, it was difficult to say whether they would survive in time to see their gifts delivered.
Tanefuji Shinryu was painting a different picture. Twice he had faced the fury of Santazaemon's Ō Christmas Tree and twice he had rebuffed it with a skillful parry. Calling upon all his skill as a samurai, Shinryu held the monster off with only minor injuries while Hidemitsu, Katsuo, and Ryuhaku all attempted to wear him down. Santazaemon was sporting several wounds of his own at this point, but he seemed immune to pain and fatigue as he kept swinging that great treelike club with increasing fury. Katsuo's attempts to break his weapon and Ryuhaku's to disarm him, likewise, failed to have any impact on the tremendous Holiday Force which was slowly wearing Shinryu down.
When Tanefuji's death came, it was not at the hands of Santazaemon. Hovering above the front car, Dragon Queen Alice enjoyed a comprehensive view of the battle as it played out. With a deep, ominous breath, she released a deadly burst of black Jabberwock fire down upon Santazaemon. The burbleflare singed his beard and burnt his flesh, but did not damage him nearly so much as those around him. Hidemitsu was incinerated instantly, while Shinryu and Ryuhaku were knocked out by the pain of the hellish explosion. Although he teleported at the last moment, replaced by a decoy block of wood in the ninja style, Tsukuda Katsuo fared no better. When he reappeared in the branches of the nearest tree, it was as a lifeless corpse once again. Aotsuki, Maxim, and Sanosuke, just out of range of the blast, looked on in horror while Dragon Queen Alice tittered in delight.
Meanwhile, in the very frontmost car with the Christmas Tree, Elyan remained blissfully unaware of the carnage unfolding in the meal carriage. He had discovered a heaping display of presents here, some of them glowing as the tree sparkled dully. In an attempt to hasten their Cheer Accumulation, he reached out to the gifts nearest him and infused them with a burst of ki. These didn't glow or show any other sign of change as the life energy entered their wrappers. The Christmas Tree seemed to appreciate his spirited attempt, at least, and shone just a bit brighter.
As Santazaemon prepared to leap the now twenty-foot gap to the next car, Ryūzaki Sanosuke decided that he'd had enough. He first gathered up the bodies of Katsuo, Shinryu, Ryuhaku, and the still-kicking Shōhei, then tossed them across the gap to Aotsuki and Maxim. Then, he jumped to the front of the car and, grabbing its side with both hands, kicked his feet into the rails below. Sanosuke's strength was on par with that displayed by Santazaemon, and so the carriage screeched to a halt. Caught up in chains cast by Fubuki, Santazaemon was unable to move to stop him as Sansouke lifted the train car and began spinning it around, building force. As the Silver General released his grip, however, Santazaemon stomped down with godlike force of his own. The car still flew, but only a thousand feet or so rather than the several miles Sanosuke might have otherwise expected. He dashed back onto the main train, but felt sure that his plot hadn't been as final as he'd hoped.
Indeed, Santazaemon returned less than a minute later. Clutching to the side of the train car like an immense, horrid bug, he began to pull back layers of metal to force his way inside. With the Christmas Tree at only half capacity, things were beginning to look grim for the Cardinal Generals. The sound of sleigh bells, in the distance for some time now, grew louder as a new figure skidded alongside the train. Shirtless and just as big as Santazaemon, this Shin Santa Claus laughed through his big white beard and congratulated the heroes on a job well done. As if in reaction to this magnificent presence, the Christmas Tree lit up all at once. Santa's jolly laugh rang out over the snowy hills as, like an immense hand formed of pure Christmas Cheer, the light of the tree reached out and grabbed Santazaemon. Hurled straight upward, the unfortunate champion of madness had time only for a stifled roar before he vanished into the twinkling sky above. The stars shone all the harder down upon them as Shin Santa Claus gave a last nod before turning his sleigh aside and vanishing into the snow.
Sensing that they'd just been a part of something magical, the heroes of the Hashinara Clan looked up at the stars glittering down above. They'd done it. Christmas was saved

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Rewards Granted

• Gnosis +5 Ticket x5
• 1 Platinum Kuma Coin

Missions/Quests Completed

• Christmas 2020

Character(s) interacted with

• Abura Akago
• Elyan
• The Gronch
• Kobayakawa "Prince Frederic Charles of Prussia" Hideaki
• Ryuhaku
• Saburō Shōhei
• Shin Santa Claus
• Sugihara Hidemitsu
• Tanefuji Shinryū
• Tarō
• Tsukuda Katsuo
• Yukijirushi no Santazaemon

Created Content

• Yukijirushi no Santazaemon

Report Date

18 Dec 2020

Primary Location

Hokkaido