11. The Phantom Door
Show, Don't Tell:
Emotions: We are told characters are scared or happy, but it would be more impactful to see their actions and expressions that reveal these emotions. For example, instead of saying "tears tracked down his cheeks" describe Bazel wiping his eyes or his voice cracking.
The Portal: Instead of directly describing the portal, use details of what Bazel sees through it to create a more chilling image.
Raise the Stakes
Family History: What is the family secret? Hinting at the parents' past and why they fear "Luminal Arcana" would raise the stakes and make the reader more invested.Deepen the Characters
Constania's Motivation: We learn she feels a pull to the basement, but why? Is it curiosity or something more? The Parents: They feel one-dimensional. Give them a few more personality traits or a scene that reveals their desperation or fear.Themes
- Family Secrets
- Disobedience and its Consequences
- Temptation and Manipulation
- Sibling Bond
- The Unknown
Structure
Exposition
Bazel Weller comes home to an empty house. Parents are at work and his twin sister, Constania Weller didn't ride the bus home with him.
Conflict
While doing his homework, he is interrupted by Constania Weller, who's finally home from the public library. She's unwilling to talk to him.
Rising Action
Climax
The Phantom Door opens to reveal a ghostly world to Bazel Weller but one of wonders to Constania Weller.
Falling Action
Resolution
Scarlett Forge and Larry Weller come home. They rescue Bazel Weller from the basement. And Bazel Weller sees who his mother really is for the first time. Scarlett Forge says they have to move and adds Constania Weller to her doll collection.
Date:
20 Harvestide 1985 IE
20 Harvestide 1985 IE
Plot type
Chapter/Short Story
Parent Plot
Related Characters
Related Organizations
Related Locations
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