Session 27: The Absolute Majesty II

General Summary

  The session began on BriskWind 3, 2597 a bit before midday on The Sarcan, a clipper leaving from port in Skormp along the Silandos River. While the party did their own separate things on the trip, they did encounter a person who looked startlingly like Rodan Spice named Norandit. Rodan Spice didn't care too much though they did discuss using the other man's body parts as a pseudo-ransom to Rodan Spice's father as part of Atticus' ransom scheme. When they reached the sea, they were asked if they wished to go the fast route or the safe route. While the party was split, they flipped a coin to make the decision. The coin decided on the fast route and so the clipper took off into the sea in deeper waters.
  During the second to last evening of their voyage, Alena Birch and Tork were keeping watch when a seaweed covered and feral green dragon attacked the ship. Its breath weapon wiped out the crew (though afterwards they realized two of the crew had gone overboard). With this, the party burst into action to kill the beast. Tork worked on getting in combat range and attacking with melee, Rodan Spice fired a bow from a distance, Atticus attempted to use magic to confuse the beast, Alena Birch fired with her bow and guiding bolt, Wren used a combination of druidic magic and a flaming sword to attack, and Kale took his starry form to attack. The battle was fierce and both Rodan Spice and Tork went down before Alena Birch fired a guiding bolt directly into the creature's mouth and out the back of its head. The creature then fell back into the watery depths below and the members of the party who were down were revived.
  After recovering some of their health, the party surveyed their vessel. Outside of a cracked mast, the ship was in good condition (minus the damage to the deck from the dragon's breath weapon). Rodan Spice assumed the role of Captain while Atticus assumed the role of first mate and Kale navigation officer. The entire party took shifts in controlling the vessel and with Atticus' intentionality on the direction, they made it to the edges of the Ancient Forest of Apuln by the next morning. From there, the party put down anchor 50 yards from shore, leaving their boat with Bull the Oxen floating while they made landfall. With their newly christened "The Absolute Majesty II" behind them, they followed Kale into the woods.
  Wren began making friends with the wildlife starting with a marsupial, trading goodberries for knowledge. They told her of smoke from the center of the forest and angry shouts. The creature promised to spread the word and to bring more information in exchange for more food. With this, the party made camp for the night and went through their watch rotation. The next day's travel mirrored the first and watches were had yet again. On the first watch shift, Kale immediately saw eyes in the forest and heard a voice in his head saying his father wanted to speak with him. Once Alena Birch awoke for the next shift, he said he had to go talk to someone and walked off into the woods.
  Kale found himself escorted to a tent surrounded by tree stumps and scorched earth. His father asked Kale to kill his uncle Barkly and gave him eight copper nails and a copper hammer to accomplish the job. During the conversation, Athelas' disdain for Kale was not masked by his nice pretenses and his scorn was evident even as Kale called out Athelas' hypocrisy. When Athelas revealed that a barrier had been erected around the HeartGrove of the Nwyfre Coven, he also revealed Kale's mother Dewlily was the one who led the splinter of the tribe to protect Barkly and the other elder trees. Kale agreed to talk with his mother and try to gain entrance to the HeartGrove. He returned to his companions and told them what happened with his father as well as his intent to not kill Barkly for his father.
  The next morning the group made for the Coven and Kale went up to the barrier. His mother Dewlily came through it and had a conversation with him after hugging him and being glad to see him. She told how she wanted to let him in, but they just couldn't risk it currently. She told him about the strangeness that had been occupying Barkly and how Kale's name seemed to make it worse. She apologized profusely before going back through the barrier.
  At this, Athelas returned swearing. He went ahead and said there was another dangerous way through the RootWarren Aquifer. The group agreed that evening to make their way down the well, through the Aquifer, and up the well inside the HeartGrove. With this, the party began their descent into the well at dusk on BriskWind 13, 2597, ending the session.  

Rejected Session Names

  • Recording in Progress
  • When I Was a Young Warthog
  • So Anywho, I Bought Some Land, Nothing too Crazy, 10 Acres
  • Having it Farmed
  • A Real Deal
  • Rock Farm
  • Always Something You Can Plant
  • That's Not My Brother I Assume
  • It's Just Genetic
  • Kinda Sent a Ransom Letter to Your Father For You
  • All of This Was to Ransom You
  • Which Of Your Body Parts Would Your Father Recognize
  • If That Guy Looks Like You, We Can Chop Off One Of His Body Parts
  • I Am Capable of Assuming Command of this Vessel
  • Parrot: Yeah, Pretty Much
  • Cute Aggression: Bite It
  • I Only Bite Assholes
  • I've Got to Get This Voice Back Now That There Isn't Chinese In My Mouth
  • Tork Had Beef Once
  • Not Beef of Cattle
  • Drowning, A Pretty Serious Thing
  • We Can Switch This Conversation to Celestial
  • What Happens to MerPeople If They Enter Salt Water?
  • "25 on 7"
  • We Should Make All Our Big Decisions This Way Going Forward
  • Tork Will Not Be Paying for Any Damages
  • That's Not How Boats Work
  • Life Insurance Policy on Rodan Spice
  • If Life Insurance Isn't a Thing, I'm Going to Create It
  • Is He Not Friendly?
  • Too Early for this Shit
  • Wonder If That Is Rodan's Brother...
  • That Was Far Easier Than I Expected - Rodan 18 Seconds Before Being Knocked Unconscious and Bleeding Out
  • Just Beat It
  • Mostly Pride Breaks
  • Hold On a Second
  • I Call That Scale
  • Lot of Nat 20s Today
  • Weighted Dice
  • I'm Going to Have to Take Command
  • Rodan, I Need You On That Helm
  • I'm Going to Take the Helm: No Idea Where I'm Driving
  • Safe Way
  • We've All Almost Died Once Or Twice
  • If We Went the Safe Way, We Wouldn't Have a Boat
  • I've Touched a Steering Wheel Before
  • Which Way to Point the Boat
  • I'm Just Going to Go Left, More Left
  • Falling Off the Face of the Earth
  • The Poles Are Where the Cannister Ends
  • Tork Prefers the Safe Way in the Beginning
  • Dragon, Worth It
  • First Officer, Can You Take the Helm for a Few Minutes
  • 8 Bodies, But 10 Crew
  • Putting on a Captain's Outfit
  • All Pizza Party Fund - 484gp
  • Navigation Officer Kale: Figure Out Where We're Going
  • Need to Figure Out What to Name Our Vessel
  • Human Meat's Not That Great
  • Kale, You Can Eat Human Meat, Now That's Okay
  • A Ceremonial End
  • Pointed in the Intended Direction
  • Thy Who Fucks Themselves Cannot be Fucked By Others
  • Long as We Don't Hit Turbulence
  • Sea Turbulence
  • Land Ho
  • The Captain is Dead, Long Live the New Captain, ATTICUS
  • Would Have Been Cool to Make Dragon's Body Our Anchor
  • Haven't Tried Dragon Meat Yet
  • Always a Chance I Could Become a Dragon
  • Hey Get Off of Me
  • Disrobe in Front of Everyone
  • "Stop Trying to See My Weiner"
  • I Guess Cameel and Bull and Ship Are Waiting on the Ship?
  • Tork Saw Rodan's Package for Nothing
  • The Other Druids: You People
  • Tons of Trees
  • The Captain's Journal
  • Anyone Want Brandy?
  • Part Time Gmail Service in Our Coven
  • Anyone Else Weirded Out by These Trees... Watching, Judging
  • Male Tree is Attracted to Tork.. Sassafras
  • Tork Has a Husband
  • Trees Are Extremely Polygamous
  • What Does the Poly Mean?
  • Trees Don't Take No For An Answer
  • No Consent for Trees
  • Poly-Weapons
  • Distracted Trees
  • These Trees Love Tork
  • One of Those Marsupials
  • This is a Good Berry
  • Sad, The Burning of Trees
  • Third Berry Down
  • Berry Machine
  • If a Tree Falls in the Forest, They Make a Hell of a Sound, They Never Shut Up
  • Did Some of the Senior Druids Set the Trees on Fire Themselves? Hypocrites.
  • Tork Tells Ghost Stories
  • Ghosts Are Real
  • Tork Doesn't Believe in Ghosts
  • Mermaids and Ghosts Are Real
  • The Dragon Technically Almost Killed You
  • The Dinosaurs Weren't Real
  • Kale is Killing Just a Few
  • Sabre Tooth Tigers Are Definitely Druids
  • Poly Means Many, But I Am Only One
  • I Turned Into a Parrot for Myself
  • So Kale is Poly?
  • Does Rodan Spice Know How to Write?
  • Is Rodan Spice Poly?
  • Rodan Spice is Whatever You Want Rodan Spice to Be
  • Wait, You're Married Now? When Did That Happen?
  • You Can't Start Dating People And Call Them Your Husband
  • Tork and Zirk Definitely Fucking Married Minus the Married Part
  • Kale Has the Exact Dimensions of Rodan Spice's Weiner
  • Just Crank It
  • He Wants Me to Kill Uncle Barkley
  • Culling the Trees from Barkley's Influence
  • Who is Right? Uncle Barkley or Your Father?
  • Trees
  • Trees, Maybe 1/16th of a Person, Half a Halfling
  • 1/32 of a Person at Least
  • If They Can Speak Full Sentences, 1/32 of a Person
  • 1/32 of a Genocide
  • Nail Your Uncle
  • I Don't Plan on Doing It
  • Let's Go Crucify Your Uncle
  • Feels Like Home
  • Weird Not Having Trees Talk
  • Uncle Barkley, I've Come!
  • I Say We Crucify Your Father With These Nails
  • Not Extreme Enough
  • Suddenly a Tree Hugger
  • I Just Think Your Father is a Dick
  • I Don't Go Around Nailing Every Tree I See
  • Wren, She's King of Into Animals, and Trees Are Animals
  • Respectfully, I Would
  • Your Dad is a Dick
  • I Can Count the Reasons I Have to Live on One Hand, So I'm Good with Whatever
  • Flip a Coin
  • Druids Don't Believe in Protection
  • Report Date
    27 Jul 2023

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