Session 37: I Graduated To Saying "No Condoms"

General Summary

  The session began on HearthWarmth 10, 2597 with the party making plans outside of the temple of Artemis in the God's Footstool in Skormp. They made a quest log of possible courses of action and came up with a list of five possibilities. From these, they decided to first pursue the beast beneath the city and its prize of 10,000gp/an audience with King Jorip. Heading over to the Ward of Nobility, they met Guardmaster Sukas, head of security for the district, who gave them them information about how the guard could be joined (6 months of training, deployments in the military, and eventually a posting to a city guard) as well as where they could find the beast and information about it. With some convincing they managed to get the guard to offer 11,000gp for the head of the beast and a writ that would allow Tork to become a guard with a brief training if he ever so chose.
  The party then headed to an abandoned estate within the Ward of Nobility. From here they descended into the ruins of the city prior, going through a tunnel, down a stairwell, and eventually finding themselves on the bank of one of the city's rivers underneath the city. As they traveled they came upon an opening in the wall with firelight coming through, a piece of the tunnel collapsed into a room that was on the other side. Upon entering, a half snake, half humanoid creature fell from the ceiling into a fountain in the center of the room, extended six arms with swords, and extinguished all the lights in the room.
  When all the dust settled, everyone had managed to get a hit in on the creature with Alena Birch dealing the killing blow with a blast of radiant energy. Tork was hurt a bit, but even taking most of the damage, he was still not too bad off. The party took the creature's head, searched the other bodies that were littered in the rooms (the missing guards and adventurers sent to find the fiendly creature), and took back off to the surface. When they reemerged, they decided to call it a night and Tork went home while the rest of the party went back to their room at the Cloud and Stars Inn. Tork discussed with Zirk Zirk coming aboard the ship to work as security on the boat; Zirk said he would consider.
  Early the next morning, on HearthWarmth 11, 2597, Kale caught up with Cameel about how well he was being pampered in the stables - fed well, lots of cleaning and trimming, beautiful. Then the party met up in their rented room (on the tab of Roland Spice) at the Cloud and Stars Inn where they prepared to ask questions to the head of the fiend. Atticus cast tongues on the creature, disguised himself as another creature like the one they killed, and had everyone else obscure themselves. With this, Alena Birch cast Speak with Dead on the head where Atticus asked five questions:
1. What is your name? Brezu 2. What were you doing down there? Following orders 3. What were your orders explicitly? To kill 4. What was the name of the person who gave you orders? Eldar 5. Were you the only one in the Fisk Empire? I only knew of my mission
  As satisfied as they could be, the group took the head back to Sukas who had it inspected by an odd fellow wearing guards armor with a cloak. The inspector was able to confirm the head was what was expected, and generally was not concerned about more of them, even at Atticus' urging to do so. Before things could escalate further, Sukas cut off the conversation by giving the party their 11,000gp (which they distributed among one another) and the promise of a meeting with King Jorip in the next two days (word would be sent to the Cloud and Stars Inn). With this Join Operations, LLC went on their way towards the Absolute Majesty II.
  When cutting through an alley, a circle of blinding light appeared on the ground in front of Tork leaving behind a piece of parchment. When he unrolled it three metal spikes fell to the ground and he read his Binding Magical Contract I. There were a mix of reactions in the party to this contract, possible loopholes, and some excitement. They decided to tackle it a bit later and focus on the immediate for the moment. Arriving at the Absolute Majesty II, Atticus gave Jandar 400gp to secure his future loyalty while Alena Birch gave him some leather armor. The party then decided to pursue varying tasks that afternoon and Rodan Spice declared he was going to head out to search out Cesantar Spice's return to the city and where he was staying and going. With that, the session ended around 10AM on HearthWarmth 11, 2597 on the deck of the Absolute Majesty II docked in Skormp.
 

Rejected Session Names

  • Tweezer Size
  • That Was Like Hanukah
  • New Bulb, Who Dis?
  • Teflon
  • Here Physically, But Not Here
  • Horny, Horny, & Horny
  • White & Black Snow
  • Just the White, Not the Black
  • Quest Log Updates
  • Beast Under the City
  • Tork Would Like to Kill
  • If My Dad Called me During D&D I'm Not Answering That
  • Ian Would Have to Call Me 4x In a Row
  • Missing an Eye and a Hand
  • 10k Gold, Barely Enough to Care About
  • Anchor Zirk Revisited
  • Rodan Spice, Functional Alcoholic
  • Its Vampires
  • Why Are We Involving Tork
  • Really Doubling Down on this Vampire Thing
  • Have My Dice in a Certain Order
  • Get to Meet the King, Get a Picture
  • Lynch Mob the Necromancer
  • "gibe blood " shirt
  • He Wants It
  • Halo Tork
  • Storking
  • Vampires Don't Like Running Water
  • Loot Bodies Afterwards
  • Skin Vampires Here Too
  • Minotaurs Can't Do It
  • Torch in my Mouth
  • Allowed to hold it in your mouth
  • I'll try to actually hit it
  • Dragon Starry Form
  • Good Try Bud
  • Does she look like a hoe?
  • Little bad for Tork
  • Rodan the Reliable
  • try to pass it off as a vampire
  • Cast "Slap Attaboy"
  • Rodan "Healed" Tork
  • Rodan Mentally Heals by Drinking
  • Sippy Cup Size
  • What the Fuck Was This Thing Doing Down Here
  • Natural At All?
  • Hey Alena!
  • Head Matters the Most
  • Gotta AT LEAST Have the Head
  • Let Them Get Their Own Dead
  • Hauling Scrap
  • On My Body
  • Head Under My Cloak
  • In the Bag
  • Cum in My Mouth
  • Keep It PG13 for the KIDS
  • Snow is New to Alena
  • Talk With Guards? Or Talk With Dead?
  • Rodan Is Going to Get Wasted for a Couple of Hours Before Going to Bed
  • Doesn't Say Deckhand
  • Getting a Shit Ton of Meat
  • Does the Head Know What Happens to it After It Was Already Dead
  • Parrot Kale!
  • Tork Is the Head Holder
  • Reverse Grapple
  • Touch the Head
  • I Remind Everyone This is a Vampire
  • The Queen Vampire Was a Real Bitch
  • 11k Gold
  • Putting Jandar Into Indentured Servitude
  • Trust Fund for Jandar
  • Randomly Showed Back Up, Gave the Kid a Gun
  • The WORST Parents
  • Gold Talks
  • Loyalty Is Tied to Gold
  • Loyalty Is Bought By Gold Or
  • Keep Telling You Zirk Will Betray You Someday
  • Tork, Start Spending More Money on Zirk
  • Tork Can Read
  • Pitons?
  • Look Me In the Eyes Tork
  • Do You Have Any Living Family Members?
  • Don't Care About Family?
  • Not Quite the Fanatic
  • Kill the Gods to Help The Poor
  • Why Do We Need These Big Temples
  • Mine's Not Big... Okay... Weird Flex...
  • A God Is Worth 30,000gp
  • Healthy Obsession With Deicide
  • Making Deicide a Hobby
  • Cesentar Spice
  • Better Not Be Polishing a Gun in the Captain's Quarters
  • Buffing the Maul
  • Token Of Our Gratitude
  • Confidentiality
  • We Will Hunt You To the Ends of the Earth
  • Haunt You as a Living Person, Then Kill Him
  • Will They "Get Along?"
  • Is Jandar Legal?
  • 17? That's Legal In This State?
  • Zuk-Dal Just Gives Really Good Quests
  • Report Date
    12 Oct 2023

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