Session 08 - We're Fucking Drunk

Guard: ...you mean 'her'?

Jalan: No, him. Do you even know the librarian?

Guard: ...yes.

Jalan: We're clearly not talking about the same librarian.

Plot points/Scenes

Post-Heist Celebration

• We are actually drunk IRL (yay South Dakota) and decide to be at a bar, namely the Golden Pipe
  • Jalan takes some drugs - out of three colors, he chooses indigo - he feels nothing until he takes a drink and it’s the best he’s ever had, then he bumps into Drant and feels complete euphoria
    • Embraces Drant and starts dancing with him
      • D: “Hey. What do you want?”
      • J: “I want everything.”
• Random dude (introduces himself as Victor Jackson) comes up and compliments us on our ability to get shit done, then mentions how this place has shitty drinks and that some rich dude’s house uptown has a really good stash of good wines and stuff
  • D: “I fought a snake god dammit”
  • J: “YOU’RE GODDAMN RIGHT YOU DID”
• Some chick who introduces herself as Isabelle is practically assaulted by drunk Jalan and Drant, Fritz puts some gold in her palm and apologizes, she says that if we ever want an employee who’s not a slut (Sylvia? what?) to hit her up
• On the way uptown, come across an officer who asks if we’re drunk
  • We do baaaaad on performance tests, Jalan is clearly rooted out as drunk, they flash some lights in our eyes and one makes a comment about “dirty drow”, Jalan swings at him and hits
  • Turns out Victor Jackson is a high elf
  • Victor makes a comment on how short Fritz is, she hits him in the ankle
• We come up to a really expensive gated house, there’s a couple of guards outside conversing
  • Some more short jokes on the part of Fritz
  • Victor is really good at acting drunk, one of the guards tries to take a swipe at him with his sword but misses and hits the other guy in the neck
  • They run off, Victor follows, Jalan follows, Fritz/Drant follow

The Masquerade

• Turns out this fancy house is hosting a masquerade tonight
  • Jalan swipes a peacock mask off an inebriated woman
  • Victor mentions Fritz and Drant should have masks, before they can get some, Drant is drawing attention - Victor holds him up Lion-King-style and says “THE ENTERTAINMENT!”
    • Turns out Drant is very bad at charisma so he is not very convincing
• We make it to another gate, guards ask what we’re doing here
  • Jalan says we’re delegates of the Volaris Empire, Fritz clarifies that we seem so drunk because we thought we had the night off and got called to deliver an emergency message
  • Once inside, we see that the room is decorated very gaudily, all in gold plate, etc., we’re stopped by someone else
    • J: “We have an emergency message for the librarian. Carry on.”
    • Guard: “Um...what?”
    • J: “Yes, just let us in to see him and carry on…”
    • Guard: “....you mean her?”
    • J: “No, him. Do you even know the librarian?”
    • Guard: “.....yes.”
    • J: “We’re clearly not talking about the same librarian.”
  • Jalan tries to slowly bring out his dart gun, does so too obviously, another guard starts to shoot at Jalan but Drant deflects it, Jalan throat-punches the guy so he doesn’t scream out for help
  • Fritz tries and fails to hammer the dude in the back of the knees, Victor (the apparently drunk-monk) goes karate kid on him and brings him to the brink of unconsciousness, demands to know where the cellar is, and Jalan garrotes him (but he’s drunk so he overdoes it and he’s probably dead now)
  • Get into the cellar, someone there doesn’t ask any questions except complains that everyone that comes down there is drunk and he doesn’t get to have any, we let him have some and he lets us on our merry way
  • On our way out sirens start blaring
  • But we get to a hotel and get rooms, Jalan wakes up cross-faded in an alley

Plot type

Session

Parent Plot

Act 1: Just Your Normal, Everday, Morally Ambiguous Power Company