Dear Diary: Today

June 20: I know people lie to me. And I pretend they don't. I look for what is good in them and I try so very hard to make them see the good in themselves. But I was not ready for what I heard today. I did not think James would be the one to...
 
There's a cold dark corner
in the back of my room,
it speaks to me
and says I'm coming for you.
 
Suddenly I am sixteen again and my mother has told me I am getting married. Told me I was worth nothing and never would be. Informed me no one would ever love me because I was not worth loving.
 
As I lie on my bed
in the fetal position,
my eyes are closed
hoping and wishing.
 
This is not how the story goes. This wasn't written in any of the books.
 
Maybe that one day
my dreams will come true,
that I don't have to be here
so down and blue.
 
Before six months ago I had never been given a love letter. Never told I was beautiful by someone who wasn't trying to manipulate me.
 
The corner keeps talking
about how I'm going to die,
all I can do
is lie there and cry.
 
Dancing. I asked him to dance. I love to dance, it feels like flying. Like being free. I never thought it would bring us to...this...
 
As the corner gets closer
and takes me in,
my soul starts to burn
as so does my skin.
 
He lied to me. About his past. And his name. He killed so many who didn't deserve it. And what do I do with that?
 
My bones shall lie there
turning to dust,
my bed surrounding
nothing but rust.
 
This is something I can't fix. He is someone I can't heal.