Homeward Bound

4/22-- 4 days of mostly uneventful travel have passed. I spent most of my time in the day practicing this new cittern, It is a way for me to momentarily escape my troubled conscience, to focus on something apart from the horrible things we've done and the terrible decisions that we might yet have to face. Yet each night I struggle to fall asleep. I spend somewhere close to an hour begging the Rose for forgiveness before eventually falling into an uncomfortable slumber in my hammock. One night I dreamt I was back on Dolmition's ship, again watching Wolfgar place his flaming hands on the wall holding in the captain and Dolmition's bound guards. I saw the same flames coming from his hands glowing in his eyes, and an insane laugh escape from his mouth before he turned his face to me with that same frenzied look on his face. I awoke in a cold sweat, terrified. And then even when the relief that it was only a dream slowed my racing heart down a bit, that relief was quickly replaced by the sickening dread of remembering that that moment did really happen in actuality. Wolfgar, his reverence, the one who I had come to know as the grumpy but kindhearted priest, used his divinely given magic to destroy humanoid lives in that way. I did not go back to sleep that night at all.
 
I think it was the next day or maybe the day before that dream that Elena, Dirge's owl came back. It lightened my heart to see her. I'm quite fond of that creature. She came back with a segment of the original monster-related documents that Dirge had sent off to his friend Boxer. I think we'll need to spend more time going through them in detail, but one bit of correspondence was mixed in there that no one had caught before... A letter from Vicar Alec Gur to Vicar Dolmitian Delfresco. It was hard to tell the context, but it said, 'it would not be well to succeed where Eldred failed,' and it also revealed he does not have much confidence in our mission of trying to find the four evangelii.
 
We expect to arrive in Matten sometime tomorrow. I'm excited to be back to my own homeland, though from Westport, we will have what may be a dangerous journey across the desert to get there. Great Rose, continue to protect us on our way!