Sins, Guilt, and Monstrosities

19th of Solae, 1485
 
Last night was embarrassing. I hope no one mentions it. I don’t remember much, except being very relaxed and having odd thoughts running through my head… something about Elves being related to birds?… I frankly don’t want to relive my thoughts or behavior last night… I hope it wasn’t too embarrassing.
 
We traveled by coach to the Cathedral of Guilt, or Chapel of Guilt, honestly, for once in my life, I cannot be bothered to remember the proper name of somewhere… it must be an effect of this cursed place. I know that I have the potential to learn answers here, but I wish that Filandrel would have told me himself, instead of telling me to go seek out someone I’ve met before at the Chapel of Sins…
 
There was an undead knight standing outside the Church of Guilt. He invited everyone inside to be cleansed of their sins. Invited inside a chapel, or cathedral, that is populated by undead in Loec of all places, to be cleansed of guilt? I wasn’t surprised when Inira entered, but I was a bit more surprised when Dekar, Hasim and Rowan accompanied her. They came out sometime later, their hair dripping with water, and looking in turn, disturbed and relieved. I don’t know what happened in there, but I’m inclined to think that it was a different experience for each one, probably relating to their differing levels of comfort and relationship with undeath.
 
We walked a bit further until we came upon the Chapel of Sins… we all entered this time. I could see a figure sitting at the front of the chapel, by the altar. He looked familiar, yet it took me a minute to place him. Sir Gerard Valerious, the very same paladin whom I traveled with in Crastvongrad… He looked at me as though I was an illusion, until I think he realized that I was indeed the same Inara Edhelhael that he had met and traveled with not too long ago… he was barely recognizable, his armor charred and battered.
 
Instead of greeting me, he looked up and asked if this was a test. I asked him what he meant. He seemed to disbelieve my presence. I informed him that I was told I would find him here.
He asked who told me.
“Filandrel.” I replied.
“The elf.” He spat, the venom in his voice catching my attention.
“Do you not see who stands before you?” I shot back, gesturing at myself.
 
He wasn’t making enough logical sense for me to record his words here… they were random and stilted. The gist of it though, is that he claims Filandrel led him east, convinced him to give his sword to a girl, and the real threat was to the southwest. He lost Viktor, the piece of shit creature who he traveled with as a keeper in Crastvongrad. Damian’s twisted “brother”… who apparently murdered the Runestone empress… Damian’s younger sister.
 
Fuck.
 
Gerard seems to blame Filandrel for this… something that I don’t know if he is simply angry, or if he is telling the truth. Surely, with his sources, Filandrel would know of Gerard’s feelings towards himself, and if so… why would he send me here to talk to Gerard? Why does Filandrel want me to hear from Gerard of Damian’s sister’s murder? Why didn’t he tell me himself?
 
“I was told I would find somebody I know here.” I began.
 
“Who told you such a thing?” Gerard interrupted. “Who TOLD you just a thing?”
 
“Filandrel.”
 
“The elf.” He spat, then sat heavily on the ground, an obviously broken man. “The elf who led me east. Away from that thing.”
 
“What are you…” I tried to ask, but Gerard ignored me, continuing as though I hadn’t spoken.
“The elf who told me to give my sword to that girl. The elf I trusted. He is yours, your master?”
 
“What are you talking about?” I asked.
 
“Do you understand what he is? Do you understand what he orchestrated? Do any of you know?” He was practically shouting at me.
 
“Know what?” I raised my voice to try to get through to him. “He said that you would give me answers, answers he didn’t feel like giving.”
 
He looks at me. “I lost track of the creature and was led east, by the elf. I was told thatI would find a girl, wandering westward and to the north. In our travels, I gave her my sword and my blessing, so that she may be safe from the monstrosity out there, the lich who dwells in the city. By the time I started to turn, I got the news, just last night.”
 
“Turn what?” I interrupted.
 
“Back west. To seek Viktor before it was too late.”
 
“You got what news?” I asked, a knot of dread forming in the pit of my stomach.
 
“The empress is dead.” Gerard stated with self-loathing.
 
“What?”
 
“Killed by the beast that was once under my charge…” Gerard continued.
 
“You let Viktor GO?” I interrupted.
 
“I was led astray by YOUR master! I was told to come East.” He snapped back.
 
I took a deep breath. “Why?”
 
“I wonder that too. I broke EVERY OATH I HAD to chase that beast. I have nothing.
The Empress lies dead.” Pain and guilt were warring on his face.
 
“Damian’s sister?” I asked quietly.
“Yes.” Gerard’s tone was finally more measured. “The creature escaped. The archlecter of the church exposed as a great dragon. Half of the imperial fleet, broken. All in one night.”
 
“What? What happened?”
 
“We were deceived. Your master had some hand in it, I know it. I’m sorry to tell you this way. I don’t know what he intends to orchestrate, or why he did what he did, but that girl did not have to die at the hands of that creature. I failed.” He sounded lost. I couldn’t blame him for that. “So, I came here, in hopes of some form of redemption…”
 
“What of Damian?” I asked. Please don’t tell me that Damian is dead…
 
“Wounded but alive.” Gerard reassured me.
 
“Was anyone else there?”
 
“The others I hear, your master, other figures… those who were around during the declaration of war by the dragon.” He explained.
 
“What declaration of war?” Filandrel mentioned that a war was likely incoming… he didn’t mention anything about this dragon, or any open declaration of war having already happened…
 
“War against elves, mutants, and the rest.”
 
Fuck. “What happened to the dragon?”
 
“He was exposed. The imperial dragon has returned once more. The first born of Tiamat and Bahamut himself.”
 
“Who else was there?” I asked. “And how do you know Filandrel had anything to do with it?”
 
“I am familiar with your master’s spells. His serpent was there.”
 
I sighed. “That’s just a conjuration…”
 
“Conjured by your master!” Gerard huffed.
 
“Anybody can conjure it.” I felt like I was trying to explain conjuration to a child.
 
“Not that elemental.” He insisted. “It answers only to your master. A snake, over a hundred feet long made of stone. Petr Pogojuwitz, your master, the assassination of the empress… it was all to coincidental.”
 
“When?” I asked, still not entirely sure he hadn’t lost his mind of something.of the like.
 
Gerard went on to explain that a few remaining members of his order gave him the news. He explained that the girl he had given his blessing and his sword to, apparently at Filandrel’s behest, had been there as well, leading two score ships from the campaign in the north. My mind was elsewhere as he talked, until three words snapped me back to the present.
 
“Gaius is dead.”
 
I found myself laughing, only paused by Gerard’s shocked and hurt expression. “I’m sorry. On so many levels. I am truly sorry for your loss.”
 
“He might have been a fool at times, but the man was useful for all of us.” Gerard was offended.
 
“Gaius was a coward.”
 
“I have seen him charge into a group of fifty men.” He defended.
 
“I have seen him leave an army to die.”
 
“You realize who made that choice? You speak of the second fight at the Twin Rivers?” I nodded and he continued in his insistence that Gaius was blameless. “The choice wasn’t the Union’s, it was the dwarves’.”

“I saw Gaius…” I began, only to be interrupted once again.
 
“The line was broken, they rallied eastward, leaving the flank exposed.” Gerard explained. “The elves came through the Diluvian, and the dwarves wandered away, chasing their axe and their glory.”
 
“And I saw Gaius fly overhead, look down at us, and continue flying.” I didn’t bother to try hiding my condemnation.
 
“To mitigate a greater loss. Do you know what was at the other side? Why Gaius…”
 
"I was currently trying to not die.” I interrupted harshly.
 
“Wyverns. Hundreds of them. Led by drow. I was there too, you know… If there’s anyone to blame, it’s the dwarves. Gaius did everything he had to do.” I never realized that Gerard was so very fond of Gaius…
 
“I am sorry for your loss.” I said quietly.
 
“Either way, the empress lies dead.” Said the defeated Gerard. “The throne is broken, the empire is on the verge of civil war, and war has been declared against anything that isn’t a man.”
 
“As the declaration was made by a dragon… wouldn’t he be declaring war on himself?” Inira asked. To be honest, I had forgotten that the rest of the party was standing not far away.
 
“The dragon pact means that the imperial family has to answer.” Gerard explained. “Once the throne answers, it will be a civil war. Houses will rally with them and houses will rally against them. The dragon signifies the strength of the Three, as the dragon was blessed by the Three himself. The victory at the Red Valley was at the hands of this dragon, after all, you see.”
 
“So he fought on your side?” Inira asked.
 
“He fought on all our sides. Why he chooses to wage war against Elves, and everything else, I don’t know. Or why he shows up now. I don’t understand it either.”
 
I do… I thought to myself, thinking back to my conversation with Filandrel… the dragon fears us, fears the potential of our blood, whatever that means exactly I’m not sure, and I hope that I’m never placed in a position to find out…
 
“Why are you all here?” Gerard asked.
 
“Trying to kill a different dragon in the east.” Inira replied.
 
This can’t be a coincidence.
 
They began talking about the “bath” they took in the cathedral earlier. Then, Gerard revealed that he accepted a pact with Secilia’s patron… he claims that he didn’t have a choice. What is it with men and claiming they don’t have a choice, as if free will is something that they only acknowledge whenever it is most convenient for them, and not when the right choice is one that will make their existence harder?
 
After introductions were given to the rest of the party, Gerard agreed to meet up with us later at the Inn of Ill Omen.
 
Not long after, we arrived outside the Mother of Churches. A bloody man was standing in the courtyard, bearing a sign stapled to his flesh. He told Inira and Secilia that if we wanted to speak with the Oracle, then we would need to bring bones from the Hill of Suicides. Something about laying them to rest.
 
We went to this hill. It was very disturbing, the sheer number of skeletons. Why would so many people choose to throw their lives away in this manner? Human lives are fleeting as it is… why shorten them further? Then, I saw the children… bones of two young children, their legs broken from where they jumped to their death, arms entwined about each other as if they sought comfort from the other as they plunged to their deaths. The skeleton of a woman, cradling that of a babe in her arms…
 
Memories swept in, unbidden and unwanted. A mother in tears, both her and her children covered in the black oozing substance that would slowly mutate them into beasts. The look in her eyes as she pleaded with me, begged me to do something to save her children, even if it was too late for her. They clung to her skirt, crying. There was nothing to be done. Then entire village would mutate soon. She would turn on her children, or they on her, and there was only one way to stop it…
 
I didn’t care so much for humans then… not as I do now. But that family… it haunted me the way they burned to ash. The mother’s face when I looked into her eyes and said “I am so sorry.”, before I unleashed the flames, ending their life in the quickest and most painless way that I knew how. Instant incineration.
 
I can still hear Damian screaming at us to stop, as he was flailing around blindly that night. Damian cried, as the rest of us killed the entire village. Every man, woman, and child. They were all corrupted, or were covered in the substance from which there was no cure. I hate to think of what would have happened if we had listened to Damian, moved on and let them live… how many more villages would be dead now? Torn to pieces, unspeakable horrors done to them?
 
I don’t regret what we did. But that mother and her children still haunt me… and when I looked upon the bones of the children holding each other, and that of the woman and her babe… I couldn’t help but see the face of the mother and hear her pleas, right before I killed them. I tell myself that at least it was quick, as painless as I could make it, and they died together… but sometimes, when I am faced with something like this… I wonder…
 
I pulled out the black floating disc from my bag, and we loaded up some of the skeletons. I made sure that the ones grabbed were those of the children and the mother and her babe. If no one else gets to be at peace, I at least wanted it to be the children.
 
As we moved to leave the hill, three ghostly women appeared. Inira and Secilia talked with them, I was ready to be done with this whole place. I don’t know who attacked whom, but a fight broke out. We were all fighting, except Dekar. Dekar just stood there and did nothing! He didn’t say anything and he didn’t do anything! I turned and shouted at him to do something, and he didn’t. He just impassively stood there and did NOTHING.
 
After defeating the spectres, we headed for the Mother of Churches. I kept glancing over at Dekar, but he wouldn’t look at me, he was just brooding and sullen. Did he freeze up? I’ve never seen him hesitate in a fight before… normally he does the polar opposite…
 
Anyway, what we found in the Mother of Churches was a monstrosity. Not that I found that surprising in the least… apparently this creature was once a woman, a saint, they say. She said her name is Aya, and she is one who broke the wall… so, I’m not entirely sure if she should be a saint or condemned, but it seems like she was condemned for it… and is bound to this place, in this form. To be perfectly honest, I stopped paying much attention when she was talking to Secilia about three humiliations that she will encounter… my mind was focused more on Dekar, and his complete inaction on the hill.
 
After a time, we made our way back to the inn. Gerard is here, and soon we will be setting out for his encampment…