A Test of Something I Did Not Have

The monastery gardens were the most beautiful I had ever seen. There was an energy of complete peace in them as I found myself surrounded by the lush green environment and the ever-energetic koi fish. I looked around in wonder, taking in every detail of every aspect of my surroundings. It took me a while to notice the monk smiling at us from atop a massive stone hand. A tree had grown such that the branches appeared to form five rings. I decided to wade through the water, removing my shoes to allow the still, cool water to engulf my feet, allowing my entire body to feel refreshed and calm.
 
As we arrived at the shrine, the monk asked whether we were here for our rings, and I explained that we were actually attending a funeral. He offered to test us for them nonetheless, and I quickly agreed, knowing how proud everyone would be when I succeeded, especially Ojiisan. As more questions were asked, I started to feel increasingly more stupid. These questions didn't seem to have answers. I knew this because I'd always known the answers until then. I suppose there's a difference between knowing everything and how to apply it. These questions seemed to be ones I couldn't find the answers to, as these weren't answers you could find in books, and ultimately I ended up failing the test.
 
The emotions I felt were almost indescribable, I can't put them into a single word. I had just let everyone down. My Headmasters, General Mak, Officer Zhi and most of all... Ojiisan. I had felt so confident I would make him proud and get my ring, but that confidence had been worth nothing. I didn't understand it. I didn't understand any of it. Up until now I thought I'd had a deep connection with the void, with my magic- with my Kami. It seems I was wrong.
 
I was told I need to empty my cup. I understand. I think too much, and when you think too much, you are unable to feel, and to understand the Void, you must understand feelings. I sat there for a while- at the shrine- trying to empty my cup. That first question flooded my mind. That was the first one I was unable to answer. I didn't know. It was such a simple thing, fundamental to my existence, but I didn't know. It's slowly killing me inside.
 
I'll never forget that first question:
Who are you?