Homesick

Well, we finally had the chance to visit the magic shop today. It was pretty incredible, and I had the chance to pick up some of that awesome wizard spray. Though to be completely honest, I was a little disappointed that Wilmanric wasn’t there. Obviously it was pretty presumptuous of me to assume that he would be, he must be very busy, but I was kind of hoping that I’d get to meet him. I mean, magic items are cool and all, but nothing compared to an actual for real wizard. Also there was a glass staff there which is… a little suspicious. Hopefully Wilmanric will be able to meet with us and he can help us get to the bottom of it.
 
Other than that, pretty boring day. Sent some letters, did some shopping, carried a cart around. Adabra seemed to forgive us (more or less), so that’s good. The tension between Flicker and Eethyl keeps on escalating, I should probably try to ease that somehow. Add it to the list of things I need to do but don’t have the first clue about how to accomplish. (Stop a dracolich, kill a dragon, fuck over a god, end an interpersonal conflict. All equally daunting.) And Wolf seemed okayish today, but I should probably try to check in with him at some point too.
 
Leaving Sef behind doesn’t sit super great with me, but I guess she knows where we’re headed so maybe she can catch up. And if not... well she could probably use some rest after all that happened. Sister Garaele is probably the best person to comfort her and explain things and everything anyways. Still felt kind of like we were abandoning her, I hope that isn't how she sees it.
 
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It’s nice to know where the Barrow is and have some idea of the dangers there so that we can be a bit more prepared on the way back. Horse guy was kind of a creep (let’s get some stepped up personal space up in this place), but all of his family and friends were just murdered so I’ll give him a pass. He did also give us a lot of information that will be super helpful. And obviously Flicker can handle herself. Still though… who just goes and… propositions a person they just met like that. Not a classy move horse guy.
 
Those orc camps in the woods sound pretty ominous. Just one more reason for everyone I meet to assume that I’m evil. It could be worse; at least these orcs are spellcasters so people won’t assume that I’m evil and stupid. I wonder if… no, that’s dumb, you have enough going on already without wasting time thinking about that. It’s not like you would even be able to tell. Or like it would matter.
 
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We were close enough to Neverwinter today that I was able to just barely catch a glimpse of the towers. It’s left me feeling surprisingly homesick. I mean, I spent most of my time there being so angsty and dejected that it never really felt like I belonged. But now, looking back on it… I miss my time in Neverwinter. I had a good life there. A little lonely, but that was my own fault. And I had my books and Breena and work. Everything just used to be so… simple. No hard decisions, no constant peril, no friends dying or… worse.
 
Could I even go back to that life now? Now that I know there are evils in the world like dracolichs and lightning pigs and I know I have the ability to stop them could I ever choose to ignore it? Just go back to living a boring, peaceful, simple life? I’m… not sure. Definitely not right now, we are responsible for fixing the Ebondeath situation, but even after that… Is this the life I want? Constantly running from crisis to crisis, never getting the chance to take a breath? That sounds like an exhausting life. And a short one. Is that what Mom would want for me? Is that what it means to be good? I’m… just not sure.