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Mother Knows Best
[CW: self-harm]
She runs back to the dorm, her heart pounding in her chest, the blood rushing in her ears. Another student walks in front of her; she doesn't notice and runs into them. She tries to apologize. She's not sure any sound comes out. She makes it inside and to the stairs. One foot in front of the other. Two at a time. She stumbles and scrambles up a few more before she gets her footing again. She makes her way to the top and down the hallway.
Some part of her mind remembers that there are other people and she slows her movements and smoothes her dress as she reaches her dorm room. She takes a deep breath and pushes open the door. To her relief, neither Vera not Mira are in the main room. She goes into her room and closes the door behind her.
"...if any of the kids I'm taking care of turn out like you, I'll be beyond proud." She hears Nel's voice echo in her mind. "I'm sorry your mother don't see it in you."
Peg feels tears start to flow down her cheeks and she growls, wiping them away with the back of her hand.
"Tears, Margarete, are for children. Are you a child?" This time it was her mother's voice.
She takes the dagger from the belt and presses the blade against the palm of her hand, focusing on the pain of it biting into her skin until she stops crying. She sits down on her bed, looking across at Dolly.
"I couldn't tell her. She's so nice."
Always pretending to what you are not.
"I'm not. I…"
You will hurt her too. Stop pretending. Let go.
Peg looks down at the dagger in her hands. Her mother was right to keep Deiter far from her. Nel didn't know, she could never understand. But her mother knew. There was no good to come from her, only vain efforts to pretend she was something other than what she is.
Continue reading...
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Who Doesn't Like a Good Soiree?
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Peg's Playlist
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Memories in Rain
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Consequences
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Mother Knows Best
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Always Too Much
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The Early Days
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The Akmon Appreciation Society
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Who Are You Fooling?
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Pretending
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Grim Things
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Childish Make-Believe
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Failure
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Afraid to Die
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Loved Until
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To Trust Yourself
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A Normal Life
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Roses and Thorns
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Through a Glass Darkly, Part One
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A Little Better?
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The Younger Orlov Daughter
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Choices and Actions
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Through a Glass Darkly, Part Two
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Roses and Thorns Revisited
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Adventures in Avalon
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Home
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Eyes
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Of Bravery and Cowardice
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Heroes and Villians
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Scars and Gaping Wounds
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