Loved Until

"You're amazing and I love you."
 
 
The words rang in her ears as she all but ran from the park. The words a full and beautiful sentence. Except it wasn't complete. That was never the end. It's always the same…I love you until.
 
"I can't do this, meet with you, no more."
 
"Being close to me, trying to save me, is going to ruin your life."
 
"Please stay away from her."
 
I love you until you say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing, think the wrong thing. I love you until you go too far, won't just stop, want too much.
 
You'll ruin your reputation, have nothing left to work with. How can you make a difference if you destroy your good name?
 
I love you until you're too controversial, too headstrong, dream too big.
 
You can't handle the demands of life. You'll end up with nothing.
 
I love you until you want different things than I do, have your own thoughts, want to fulfill your own desires.
 
Vera loved her…until.
Her father loved her…until.
Nel…she thought Nel saw her…understood her...but she had her limits too. She loved her…until.
 
She didn't know how she got back to her family's estate. She couldn't recall the trip. But the wrought iron gate and the heavy wooden door made her heart feel light for just a moment. Familiarity and clarity took the place of fear and the pain of disappointing someone else she loved.
 
Her mother's face had a moment of surprise, breaking her cold mask, when Peg told her she'd come to make peace.
 
"You've been talking to your father." Her mother's voice sounded smug, awaiting an apology Peg knew she'd never accept. She didn't even try to stop the grin when she told her mother "let me tell you of my sins to put it all behind us." She knew her mother knew in that moment she hadn't come to make peace. She'd never come to make peace. But this was a pain she knew how to handle…a mother's disappointment that broke skin, broke bones, but left her heart intact.
 
Half the words she told were true, the other half embellishments on embellishments. Neither of them cared. They both knew how this story went. Her mother promised that she'd break her. Peg dared her to do her best.
 
Only then her mother…didn't. She just sat there smirking. Smug.
 
"Little girl, begging to be punished. Pathetic." Her mother gave her that smile that said she knew she'd won. Peg's cheeks flushed with heat, her mother's eyes icy cold.
 
"You aren't even worth my time." It was that that finally pushed her over the edge. She screamed, sending an ice knife into the door as her mother turned to go. It exploded, sending shards of ice into her mother's arms. And then Peg knew that she had won. Her mother's icy mask broke and the force of her hand sent Peg reeling backward. Their familiar story again being told.
 
By the time the chapter finished, she'd been turned back out in the cold…black and blue…fingers shattered…one eye swollen shut. The footman at the carriage couldn't meet her gaze as he told her Baroness Jaeger wouldn't let him drive her back. She smiled softly at him and began the long walk…home. Where she'd have to face the harder pain again…of seeing people that she loved, love her…until.