Gifts for the Weak

I'm not good at saving my wealth and would much rather spend it than have it sitting in my pockets for someone to steal. It would certainly be much more difficult for someone to steal my weapon than pickpocket some coins.
 
Over the past several weeks since arriving in Greyhawk, I've been doing one job after another. The pay has been good, and the treasures found from raiding crypts and taking from slain enemies has been even better. I've found some pretty cool stuff so far! Some of it I've been able to sell, and I'm keeping some for myself - like the really fancy drinking horn I found in that Wind Duke's crypt. He definitely doesn't need it anymore. I've also been collecting teeth, claws, fangs and other fierce trophies from slain foes that I intend to make a necklace out of. I'm still working on that.
 
Well, we are back in the big city again. I still don't like being around so many people and in such claustrophobic areas as this. Give me a vast empty plain over a bustling city any day of the week. I've grown used to the stares of common people who can't get over my size, skin or eyes - but it still never sits well. I hear the whispers behind my back, but rarely does anyone have the guts to say anything to my face. Those are the most fun...
The only good thing about these big cities is that there are plenty of places to spend all my collected monies and treasures. I decided to take advantage of that during this trip, because gods know when I'll be back again and I sure don't want to keep lugging around all these weighty coins. As if my stature wasn't enough, I'm sure all the jingling in my pockets causes plenty more stares, and usually from those wanting to take it. Let them try!
 
Anyways... I decided to do some shopping. I got a few things for myself of course. As an old acquaintance of mine named Tommy Haverford used to be fond of saying, "Treat Yo' Self!" It's always great fun to visit the weapon shops to see all the wonderful new ways to kill things. In the spirit of Tommy, I did get myself an amazing new quiver that holds WAY more than it should. That's the best use of magic I can think of. Then I got lot of new weapons to fill it with, and I'm extremely excited to have a whole arsenal at my disposal! I also got several things I intend to use with the owlbear when I get back to Diamond Lake and visit it at Smenk's place where I left it. Oh my gods, my belt! I almost forgot about it! I found this amazing belt at a pawn shop of all places... whoever let this thing go is an idiot. As soon as I tried it on, not only did it look amazing above my new loincloth, but I immediately felt hardier. I also overheard a couple dwarves near me speaking in their native tongue, and I understood them! I said something to them in Dwarvish and it was like we were fast old friends. I knew I had to have it and try it out on Doc, so I bought it.
 
Once Doc crossed my mind, I wanted to get him something. Maybe it was the belt that made me want to get him a gift - that's not a normal thought for me. It felt strange... Definitely must have been the belt. Oh well, the belt is too good to pass so I'll keep it, regardless of this horrible feeling. I was thinking of what he might could use to be stronger in battle, and of course I figured he needed a shield. That guy is always getting a beating. Kudos to him though for taking it all - those stouty little folk sure can take a hit. But, a shield would still help him from getting pummeled so bad. In talking to my new dwarven kin around town, it was clear they all adored some guy named Moradin. I think he's a celebrity or something. I've also heard Doc mention his name a few times, so I found a shield that had his symbol on it. That way Doc can keep up with the latest fashion trend this Moradin fellow is setting. Oh! I also found a helm that will make his eyes glow just like mine do! In all my travels I've never seen anyone else that can do that, and seeing that Doc and I are basically brothers now, I thought it would be perfect if he could do it too. Hopefully he likes it.
 
Since I got Doc something, I again had this really gross feeling that I should get something for all those people hanging around me. I seriously don't like this feeling! I don't know where it keeps coming from, but I want it gone. Note to self, I need to find a temple or healer that can exorcise this from me.
 
Against my better judgement, I got everyone else stuff too. Even the elves. Ugh. They all better like this stuff and use it or else I'm gonna be pissed.
 
It was horrible, but in order to find useful things for Armando, I had to go to one of the magic shops. I hated every minute being in that gods awful store. The inventory was lame, the other shoppers were stupid, and the shop owner was especially testing my patience. I just told him to give me whatever will help make a magic user stronger in battle, and he ended up giving me a bag of crap that was super expensive! It was mostly just parchment scrolls and a ridiculous looking hat. Actually, I really like the hat - it's going to look so stupid on him! I ran by a tailor really fast to have them embroider his name on the brim so he can't sell it or give it away and he HAS to wear it! I can't wait to see how lame he's going to look!
 
I literally had no idea what to get the new guy that just showed up, but I figured I might as well get him something so he doesn't get all jealous and try to stab the others and take their stuff. He said he was a monk, and the only other monk I really knew anything about was Alduin, and Alduin always drank tea for some reason. So, I got the new elf some tea. As a monk, he doesn't seem to wear anything fancy, and seeing how fancy Lhoris always dresses, I got the monk some new clothes so they could match and look stupid together. The tailor said these clothes were magic and could always mend themselves, but whatever, I didn't care. I just wanted to get out of that shop as quick as I could. I basically grabbed whatever was on the nearest shelf, paid for it and left. Good riddance to that fancy pants shop.
 
Speaking of Lhoris, I got him some really amazing gag gifts! Well, he can still use them, so it's not like I'm just throwing my gold away. Although I totally would just for the satisfaction of punking him. I got that elf some tools that will let him craft and make his own girly jewelry. Now he can make as many dainty bracelets and necklaces as he wants. No doubt he'll try and make friendship bracelets for everyone... HA! The next gift I got him was truly amazing. I saw it in a window of some shop while passing by. It had a display of flowers all around it, and I knew it would be perfect for him. I'm totally going to set it up like I got him this super powerful and awesome weapon, and then when he goes to try it out.... haha, I can't wait to see the look on his stupid face when his dangerously powerful warstaff only creates flowers! Knowing him, I'm sure he'll figure out some other lame use for it though.
 
Oh right, Kit. I don't know why, but I actually felt a little good about getting her gifts. She's sweet, and even though she's an elf, I don't feel right making fun of her. Maybe because the few times she's talked about her past, it made me remember mine and how crappy it was. She should consider herself lucky she at least had one parent that loved her. She's spoken a few times about smells reminding her of her childhood, and I had heard from a very charismatic bard sailor I met some time ago named Tristan, about a magic spice pouch. He had a pet monkey that had one and would run around throwing pepper in people's eyes that he didn't like. It was hilarious! Oh man, that guy sure was cool. He also told me they used the spice pouch a bunch when making a huge pumpkin pie after coming across and ungodly amount of smashed pumpkin. Anyways, I was able to find one of those spice pouches here in town, and I thought that Kit could use it to have the smells she remembered so fondly. She also has a pet mouse. Well, had. I guess this was the ninth one? That's just weird. Just thinking about having a pet of my very own, and then thinking about my baby owlbear that was stripped so cruel and maliciously from my grasp - multiple times! - made me really, really sad. I decided to stop by a pet shop and see if they had anything that could help fill that deep, dark hole in my wounded heart, but nothing can take its place. I did find some replacement pets for Kit though. I had no idea what she'd want, but I definitely didn't want to get her mouse #10. I ended up finding 3 animals I think she'll like, but I fully don't intend on her keeping all three. I'm sure she'll take the one she likes most and just let the others go, which I'm totally fine with. How on Oerth will she carry all 3 of those with her on our travels anyways!?
 
That's it. I'm actually a little excited to see how they all react when I give them this stuff. Again, these new feelings are really weird to me. Maybe I'm just feeling extra good because of last night at the brothel. Boy, that blonde was something else! Definitely worth the 3000 gold coins I got for the bow off Alduin's corpse.