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66. I am okay
She threw out the newest write up, it was terrible. Scarlet took a moment to center herself, going through breathing exercises. She used this to shove down a memory...
[[[
"What is WRONG with you!?" the woman yelled at the child.
"Mo-mommy I'm sorry...." the slamming of items near her head frightened her and she shrank further.
]]]
Scarlet wiped away her tears as she focused again, thinking hard, redirecting her memories....
[[[
"Cherry-berry? What's wrong?" the star walker asked as she patted her head.
A quiet voice whispered, "I got it wrong again."
"Yes," she paused as she looked at the mess, "I see that. But why are you crying."
Several heartbeats passed before she explained, "....Because I'm a bad child?"
"Cherry, failure is just life. You'll never be good at whatever your doing at the beginning. You just need to keep trying and persevere. Think of failure as a lesson and keep moving forward."
"But... mommy said-"
Sniffles cut her off, "No. You are not a failure. YOU are not wrong or bad. You're just a child and you will fail a lot because YOU ARE A CHILD. As you get older and have more experience you'll fail less. But failure never goes away. We all fail at some point in our lives, the thing you must remember my tiny-berry, is that this is a normal part of life and you need to pick yourself up and try again."
"But... I'm the heir. I'm supposes to be PERFECT."
Sniffles patted her hair and mumbled under her breathe, "I have many things I want to say regarding your mother..." Taking a moment to steady herself she looked lovingly at her and told her, "You are a child and no one is perfect. Remember this, no one is perfect and you have permission to be yourself. I hope one day you feel comfortable just being yourself."
]]]
Her heartbeat had steadied and she became calmer. Looking about she re-centered herself and mumbled, "I'm okay to be myself. I'm okay as I am. I am me, and I don't need to be anyone else...." She tried again, still failing but... she didn't feel so bad about it. This time, when Sniffles looked over it she had less red marked across the paper. Scarlet smiled.... and when she got home, the only thing written in her journal today was, {"I am okay. I am me, and I am okay."}
Continue reading...
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01. Settling in
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02. Fist Fight at a fancy Ball
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03. It's a Lion not a 'Cat'
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04. Patron's tea and dance
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05. The escort job
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06. Update: Today's purchase list
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07. Escort for Bella and the Loot King
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08. Sirens and a chase in town
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09. Got abducted again
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10. Jams and Jellies
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11. New Dog
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12. Guards in the Trees
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13. Temple Visit
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14. New Pup & Outing
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15. Training exercises
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16. Fighting over an idol
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17. Jobs galore
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18. New stationary
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19. A small visit
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20. Slaps and shows
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21. Today's meal
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22. Homesick
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23. Lanterns in the sky
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24. Baby in the park
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25. The Heist
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26. Update: Guild
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27. Mines and Traps
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28. New clothes
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29. I made Journeyer!
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30. Investment shopping
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31. The Pit (fights)
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32. Ghosts of the past
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33. Unexpected ending in a Play
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34. Today's meal
https://www.worldanvil.com/hero/journal/1aa083c5-ae1f-4624-a724-197a3f8704e3/view
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35. Spies and secrets
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36. Wanted: Three Hand Gang (WED)
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37. Well it's official
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38. Hags and stones
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39. Death and visitations
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40. the shell game
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41. Anger and plots
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42. The jobs so far
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43. (Doodles)
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44. Meetings and Partings
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45. Double checking
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46. An office Scene
8/01/2023
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47. An(other) office Scene
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48. Paperwork
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49. Behind the curve
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50. Notes and notation
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51. Cake and notes
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52. Paperwork on the high seas
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53. Pics and notes
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54. A small talk
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55. Small notes
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56. The Dressmaker
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57. (food)
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58. Notes
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59. Putting the clues together
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60. Notes
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61. Tea cakes (& slights)
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62. Updates
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63. Board Meetings during battles
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64. Updates
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65. Field command
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66. I am okay
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67. Mountains of paperwork
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68. Needed Vacation
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70. A note
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71. An update
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72. Dissapointment
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73. Notes
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74. Journal entry
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75. Ledgers
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76. Food
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77. An update
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78. A thought
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79. Basking in Dusk's light
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80. A note
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81. A letter home
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82. A dream/a journal entry
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83. An update
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84. Working long hours
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85. A dream, a memory
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86. A meeting
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87. The ride home
https://www.worldanvil.com/hero/journal/1aa083c5-ae1f-4624-a724-197a3f8704e3/view
8/01/2023
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