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Sat 3rd Nov 2018 10:46

Fuck Everything

by Seirixori Iscitan

I fucked up again.
 
I saw it, that fucking huge ass thing, and I panicked and instead of asking my water friends to get Danai to safety first I just... reacted and moved the boat.
 
And then I don't see her or Nysa and not a few seconds later that asshole comes exploding out of the water with, according to Ryleigh, a very dead Danai.
 
I don't know what I would have done had Gunnloda not been there.
 
And then I just let her fend for herself and didn't help her out of the water at all.
 
Like I never lived with or befriended a blind person for fucking sixteen years before.
 
I'm so fucking stupid, I could have made it so that flying piece of shit no longer could fly, and did I do that? No of course not, that would have to mean I'm actually a smart person.
 
This whole entire fucking day points to me being abso-fucking-lutely not one.
 
Maybe that's another thing to thank Gunnloda for, Takara or Mielikki can't see that I'm fucking everything up, so at least someone doesn't see it.
 
Also, fuck you Ryleigh. You're going to come over here and start talking to me and I won't stay mad because being mad at you is just like being mad at Gunnloda and that hurts too much and I don't like it, but for at least a few more minutes I'm going to be mad at you.
 
I hope Danai will let me apologize...