Processing Change

by Flicker Greenridge

Venomfang is dead.

Had I been less cautious -

Had I told them -

Reidoth is dead.

Had I been less suspicious -

Had I asked him -

They were brothers.

This line of thinking goes nowhere.

It goes in circles.
Circles are somewhere.
Somewhere where the end is the beginning.
The beginning of something better.
Better for me and my future and my path.
My path leads me somewhere new.
New meaning and new goals.
Goals to rid the world of destructive evils.
Evils like anchorites and ebondeath and dragons.
Dragons like Cryovain and Claugiyliamatar and Venomfang.

Venomfang is dead.

----

Flicker felt like she was floating after she shut Reidoth's eyelids. Her mind knew it wasn't her old mystic but her skin prickled as she looked at the lifeless look-a-like in front of her. Her head was cloudy and her thoughts seemed to loop in on themselves.

Not long after Argus left she went looking for him. He had told her that his work with her was finished for now, that she needed to find her own way on the path. She was stubborn. She was lonely. She went looking for him, at first in earnest and then in passing as she perched other goals above him. As the months became years, slowly, Flicker came to accept that he was gone. It was easier to think him dead than think herself so unable to find trace of someone she thought she knew well.

She trusted the vision to be a dream outside Axeholm. It was soft and comforting.

This was thorny. A tangled thicket of briars and vines.

She should have known better when she was called by her first birth name. When she overheard the orcs speak of the dying. When there would be no way for -him- to be so near and her not catch wind.

Still. This alternate taught her now too. And gave her directions. Lifted her confidence. Gave her reasons to go and do.

The warm words of her dream rang in the distance as she sat with the body. "Be grateful for the time you had."

And so she could be. She would be. As soon as she came down from this weightless feeling of displacement. No longer was she seeking the green Venomfang. No longer did she believe her people would be avenged at Thundertree. No longer was the quest to defeat Gorthok in service to Keth, nor the defeat of Cryovain in service to Phandalin. Now her purpose was tacked on, laid out before her.

In one night, everything changed then changed again.

There's much to process.

Continue reading...

Every Time
Marpenoth 29, 1492

Poor Judgement
Marpenoth 30, 1492

Second Thoughts
Uktar 1, 1492

Being Present
Uktar 2, 1492 - day

Getting Through
Uktar 2, 1492 - night

Organizing Ideas
Uktar 3, 1492 - part 1

Strange Happenings
Uktar 3, 1492 - part 2

More Surprises
Uktar 3, 1492 - part 3

Shell Games
Uktar 3, 1492 - part 4

Clipped Notes
Uktar 4-6, 1492

Logging Camp
Uktar 6, 1492

Years Ago
Years Ago

During Watch
Uktar 7, 1492

The Band
Marpenoth 2, 1492

Of Apples
Uktar 8, 1492

In Town
Uktar 9-11, 1492

Meeting Falcon
Night of Uktar 11 - Night of Uktar 14

Woodland Walk
Uktar 15-16, 1492

Mad Manse
Uktar 16, 1492

Still Up
Night of Uktar 16, 1492

Processing Change
Late Uktar 16/early Uktar 17, 1492

Three Down
Uktar 17, 1492

New Debt
Uktar 18, 1492

To Return
Uktar 19-20, 1492

Kindling Papers
Morning of Uktar 21, 1492

Light(ning) House
Uktar 21, 1492

Cloudy Mind
Morning of Uktar 23, 1492

Pip Stonehill
Uktar 24 1492

Herbal Teas
Marpenoth 10, 1485

Ice Wall
Uktar 26, 1492

Going Back
Uktar 28, 1492

An Ending
Feast of the Moon, 1492

Processing Change

Continue reading...

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