Getting fucked up. And better?

by Cualli Yaotl

Last night was better than the night before. I wasn't intending on going out to at all, but Esi quite rightly pointed out that it wouldnt help me to retreat into myself. Still I found it difficult to really get into the spirit of the evening. But halfway through the evening, i tried to get advice from Ruin on how to deal with my anger. I don't get the sense that what works for her will work for me overall, but she helped me to give myself permission to feel it I guess? My exact memories aren't clear, but I know it must have been what I needed to hear, because I was willing to share Ogorogo with her. Obviously, the stuff they brew here is nothing to the Yamassans, but it probably still was a bad idea to chug an entire bottle at once. Although I think that was the point? Embracing the bad idea, the recklessness of it. That made the prospect of fucking up seem like not the end of the world, maybe that's what I needed after that gremlin fiasco.It certainly helped me get talkative with the others and start enjoying myself.
I'm not fine. I don't think I will be until this threat is dealt with, but I'm going to try and give myself permission to react how I need to, and I'm going to make more of an effort to actually enjoy this opportunity I've been given.

Today was a good start, I attended Strands' Birthday and made friends with her *adorable* Children. I actually told them about the Bee dream, they seem like little secret collectors, and I couldn't help myself they were so cute. They bring out the big brother instincts and I've been wishing I could pick up little Tenoch for the last hour or so. Aside from being adorable, the little ones also told me that Ignaci has been messing about with the nethys head... I wonder if the head would answer If I asked what he's doing, but to be honest I don't feel snoopy enough to do that, nor like I know him well enough to just ask. It's interesting but for now thats all it is. Strands herself I didn't talk as much with. She seems interesting though, very creatively minded.
I suppose I'll get to know them all better soon, now that classes are starting.

Continue reading...

The dream
4719 AR

The entrance exam
Oathday, 1st of Gorzan 4721 AR

New Homes New Faces
Oathday, 1st of Gorzan 4721 AR

A Market Journey
Fireday, 2nd of Gozran 4721

Letters from Cualli
Starday 3rd of Gorzan 4721

Nightmares and Nudity
Moonday 5th gorzan 4721 AR

Weakness and Wounds
Wealday, 7th of Gorzan, 4721

Getting fucked up. And better?
Fireday, 9th of Gorzan 4721

Session 10: Fuck. You. Chizire
Moonday 12th gorzan 4721 AR

Session 12. Suspicions
Wealday, 14th of Gorzan, 4721

Session 14. Library battles
Oathday, 15th of Gorzan 4721 AR

Session 15. Babysitting?
Fireday, 16th of Gorzan 4721

The tournament: session 16
Starday 17th of Gorzan 4721

Masking. Session 18

He's dead. Sessions 19-22
Session 22

The Journal Entry’s title

Never a break Session 23

The Journal Entry’s title

Crushes, Bugs, and Crushing Bugs. session 28

Meeting Jaanatimo

Spiders and snakes
24th March 2024

Onward and upwards
28/4/2024

Speeches, subterfuge and sex offers

Powder plots

Community

Criminal element
28/07/24

Getting fucked up. And better?

Continue reading...

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